[Part 3] ( LƒÖ`) Grandpa [Legendary] (1000)

1 Name: Captain Obvious 1993-09-4517 09:29 [no]

( LƒÖ`) hello kids!

851 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4591 23:57

( LƒÖ`) You worry too much about details. You'll be my grandpa at this rate.

852 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 03:47

( ß ƒŽß)@Omedetto!
( ß -ß)@...
( ß -ß)@Oh, is that riff over already? Sorry.

853 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 07:15

(EÍE) Grandpa >>847, what do you think about black people and other minorities?

854 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 08:58

( LƒÖ`) you're all pork to me, Junior.

855 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 09:03

(EÍE) Although it may be a health hazard in hundreds of ways, I like chicken much more.

856 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 09:27

( LƒÖ`) I once killed a man who came between me and my meal of pigeon; but that's a story for another time.

857 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 13:52

(EÍE) Grandpa, I recently read Papillon, which leads me to ask you this critical question: What's the most creative way you've come up with to hide money?

858 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 14:21

( LƒÖ`) Savings account.

859 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 15:00

( E[Ej I have a swiss bank account, but don't tell anyone!

860 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 16:57

( ß -ß) Is that your cash card?

(@ß ƒŽß)@Yoink!
@¼œc

(ß ƒŽß )@See ya later!!

861 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 17:10

ƒ°(LƒÖ` ) Come back here! Where's my share?!

862 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4592 19:47

( E[Ej $10 down the drain...

863 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4593 01:43

( LƒÖ`) You could buy a luxurious dinner with that money! And dessert! And some fine wine along with that! And still have money for more!

( LƒÖ`) Dagnabbit, if only I didn't drop my beatin' stick..

(EÍE) It's about 4 inches from your left han-

( LƒÖ`) Too damn far!

864 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4593 12:45

( ß -ß) ...
( ß -ß) I felt guilty so I brought it back.

(@ß ƒŽß) Wanna see my new rhinestone-studded mittens?

865 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4593 18:25

(EÍE) Grandpa! Welcome to the "Actor's Studio" with me, your humble host, Junior. Thank you for joining me.

(EÍE) Grandpa, we've enjoyed you in such magnificent films as "Nevada Carries a Blade," "Internet: Serious Business," and in the classic "4chan is down." However, what is your favorite film?

866 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4593 19:00

( LƒÖ`) Passion of the Seven Dwarves

867 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4594 14:32

i*`యLjA CHALLENGER APPEARS

868 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4594 15:07

(EÍE) That mask isn't scary AT ALL, Grandpa!

869 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4594 17:30

( LƒÖ`) It made you pee in your pants when you were a little squirt. You know, Junior, you're not cute anymore.

870 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4594 18:10

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) Hey dad, what's up?

871 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4594 19:26

( LƒÖ`) I told you I disowned you, damnit!

872 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4594 21:59

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) In that case, I'm going to stop paying your old folks home bills. Have fun on the street, pops!

873 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4594 23:21

( LƒÖ`)I've made enough off the sale of mittens to live comfortably for the next fifty years.

( LƒÖ`)Incidently, I still have what you did with yours on video, you naughty fatman.

874 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 03:56

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) So I'm still in the will, right?

875 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 07:47

( LƒÖ`)....

( LƒÖ`)....

( LƒÖ`) you have the same place in the will that you had before this conversation, if that's what you mean.

876 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 09:00

(EÍE) Grandpa, but didn't you...
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1118254935/51-52

877 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 09:05

(;ß -ß) ...

( ß ƒŽß) Fuckmittens!

878 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 11:38

( E[Ej ...I have a brother?

879 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 13:23

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) I'm your dad, you uneducated doof.

880 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 14:10

(EÍE) They told me you ran off with a truckdriving man years ago. Mom cried about it all the time.

881 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 14:53

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) Hey, I was young and I needed the money!

882 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 15:27

( E[Ej ...a brother?

883 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 15:39

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) Nope. Didn't need a brother.

884 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 16:53

( L௰`j ...

885 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4595 21:06

@,¤Q,¤
@‚Œ ß(¥)ßj@d00d, your nose...
@l‚ÂÞ"/)
@.l/),,j

886 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 00:04

(EÍE) Uncle, what was life like after leaving Grandpa?

887 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 01:00

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) I'm your DAD you moron. You must have gotten your intelligence from my sister's side of the family.

888 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 01:07

(EÍE) YOU'RE NOT MY FATHER!!!!

889 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 01:11

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) And you missed a perfectly good 888get. I'm so disappointed in you, son.

890 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 01:13

( E[Ej ...I have a sister?

891 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 01:34

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) Your sister, my ex-wife, your mom. All the same person.

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) We have a very close family.

892 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 05:20

                             ( LƒÖ`)
                       The world is vieled in
                       darkness.  The wind stops,
                            the sea is wild,
                      and the earth begins to rot.
                             The people wait,
                      their only hope, a prophecy....
                     " When the world is in darkness
                        Four Warriors will come...."
                        After a long journey, four
                          young warriors arrive,
                           each holding an ORB.

893 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 05:36

(@¥ิƒÖ¥ิ) I'll be Chaos.

894 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 06:49

(EÍE) I, Junior, will knock you all down!

895 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 15:48

( ß ƒŽß) I'll be a white mage! Here everyone, wear these mittens!

( LƒÖ`) I guess I'll be a fighter. Sure takes me back.

(@MƒnLjI'm making a guest appearance here just to be your black mage!

( E[EjI'll be a thief.

(;LƒÖ`)(;ß -ß)(;EÍE)(;¥ิƒÖ¥ิ)( EƒÖE) But they suck!

( E[EjOh okay, black belt then.

( LƒÖ`)( ß ƒŽß)( E[E)(@MƒnLj*And so, the four ..well, not really so young warriors begin their journey as they enter Corne-*

|E_E| I WILL BE WARMECH. NUCLEAR.

GAME OVER

896 Name: MODD!5JrU4QOlH6 : 1993-09-4596 16:31

>>895 has been banned because: No mages.

897 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 16:53

(EÍE) Grandpa, why is Gau so obnoxious? I mean, it takes forever to learn all those different abilities.

898 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 19:27

>>895

( LƒÖ`) gtfo mod impersonator

>>896

( LƒÖ`) i dunno, lol

( LƒÖ`) am i cool yet?

899 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 19:29

( LƒÖ`) add +1 to numbers on >>898 orz

900 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 20:19

900GET!

901 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 22:12

(EÍE) Grandpa, it isn't like you to make such huge mistakes... who are you REALLY?

902 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 22:32

>>901
( LƒÖ`) They call me....zabadab

903 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4596 23:23

(EÍE) Wut? What did you do with my grandpa?

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904 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4597 00:08

( LƒÖ`) I created Grandpa; 4-ch copied me.

905 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4597 05:51

(EÍE) Grandpa, that FF1 thing was interesting. I think that's what we need in this thread - a little adventure, don't you think?

906 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4597 21:28

( LƒÖ`) My life IS...well, used to be full of adventure.

( LƒÖ`) Are you trying to tell me you're uninterested in listening to my adventures?

907 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4597 23:29

(EÍE) ... Okay, I'll listen. Just a minute.

@@@@@@@@ Ć^R-A_Q_@@All right, I'm ready.
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908 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4598 00:02

( LƒÖ`) Well, it all started out when-

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( LƒÖ`) Boobs.

(EÍE) !?!?

( LƒÖ`) Gotcha!

909 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 00:08

(EÍE) Is it true that boobs are very soft to touch?

910 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 01:46

( LƒÖ`) A woman's breast is the hardest rock the Almighty put on this earth.

911 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 06:55

( EÍE)‚Â(E(E You lied, grandpa. They ARE soft.

912 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 10:09

( ß oß) Junior? What did I tell you about ever touching my breasts again???

913 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 11:41

( LƒÖ`)‚Â(E(E Junior, don't ever touch them again!

914 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 13:41

( ß Eß) eeeeeek!

===>foom<

( EAE) You just CAN'T control yourself, can you, Grampa?

915 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 13:45

( LƒÖ`) you started it.

916 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 19:05

(EÍE) I was just curious because you've lied to me before gramps.

917 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4599 19:18

( LƒÖ`) Lies are more interesting some times, Junior. Besides, weren't you the one that started all that leprechaun talk?

918 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 00:06

( LƒÖ`) Besides, I'm old. I haven't gotten any since...

( LƒÖ`) ...Long enough!

919 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 03:57

(EÍE) Grandpa, why does Squeek's thread sucks dick like the rest of those wannabe "Lets get to 1000 by".

920 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 13:15

( LƒÖ`) It may appear that way to you, Junior, but it is well on its way to becoming "Legendary". On the day that a Junior thread gets to 1000 on its own merits is the day that you can mock Squeeks.

921 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 19:40

(EÍE) Grandpa, is it true that it's not the size of the dog in the fight, but the dog that's fighting....

(EÍE) It's the dog fight is the size of... wait a minute....

(EÍE) Dogs are in a fight larger than they appear or something....

922 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 20:43

( LƒÖ`) Junior, how many times have I told you to stay away from japanese porn?

923 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 20:47

(EÍE) But this is German!

924 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 21:49

( LƒÖ`) I can see how you'd be confused by the scat; but none the less, 'auschwitz scheisten meisters' is japanese.

925 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 21:50

( LƒÖ`) I can tell by ss uniforms

926 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4600 21:51

( LƒÖ`) and having seen many japanese scat films in my day

927 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 00:21

(EÍE)Grandpa! Why don't we ever see grandma?

928 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 01:07

( LƒÖ`) ...

( LƒÖ`) Can you keep a secret?

929 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 01:11

(EÍE) I haven't told anybody about ther grab-the-worm game we used to play, have I?

930 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 01:14

( LƒÖ`) Well, ok. Remember the burgers you ate yesterday?

( LƒÖ`) ...

( LƒÖ`) They're made from your grandma.

931 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 01:18

(EÍE)Grandma was made out of tofu?

932 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 01:40

( LƒÖ`) Sure was! And your mom is made from pure gluten!

933 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 01:45

( LƒÖ`) No, but her finger got caught in the grinder.

934 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 01:54

(EÍE) Grandpa! Why can't I put it in her pooper?

935 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 04:16

( LƒÖ`) Hang on a moment, Junior. I contradicted myself and now my brain hurts.

936 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 04:19

( EƒÖE) And that's how it happened.

937 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 09:03

(EÍE) Grandpa! What will happen when this thread reaches 1000? I'm scared...

938 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 09:21

( LƒÖ`) >>1001 will make a new thread, Junior; now go put on unsoiled pants.

( LƒÖ`) ...

( LƒÖ`) You can leave that pair here

939 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 10:20

(EÍE) Why? What are you going to do with it?

940 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 10:23

( LƒÖ`) Cleanse them with an all-consuming fire of purification

941 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 10:33

( LƒÖ`) after I sniff every little morsel clinging to them.

942 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 11:25

( L3`) Grandpa... You love me, i know that.

943 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 12:56

( LƒÖ`) It's getting darker now... Junior, I'm beginning to sense that we're in the final days, and the remaining posts grow fewer each day. Tell me now, what have you learned from Part3 that made it all worthwhile to you?

944 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 18:22

(EÍE) I didn't learn anything but it was all enjoyable. Thanks for the bread.

945 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 18:51

( LƒÖ`) ....

( LƒÖ`) that's not bread; now i have to buy more sponges.

946 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 19:31

(EÍE) Ha ha ha, Grandpa. Next you're going to try to tell me that this isn't Jesus' blood!

947 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4601 19:50

( LƒÖ`) It is, and that's the last time I'll hire a mexican prep cook.

948 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4602 11:31

('=_=) Gradpa, may i show you my underwear?

949 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4602 13:08

( LƒÖ`) .... Depends.

950 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4602 14:47

( '*_*) for what?...

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