Post your fail stories and most embarassing moment in your life for everyone to read. I will post my story tommorow since its late.
I'm actually waiting for >>1.
One time at PE someone dropped my pants without me noticing.
That was embarassing. And somewhat erotic at the same time..
I sometimes pee in the bath.
I'm addicted to sugar and can't stay on a diet.
The only woman I've ever touched in a romantic way was 6 years old.
But she was playing hard to get and I didn't even get to first base with her.
Top that.
I needed to piss bad. The feeling of my full bladder bypassed some circuit in my mind, causing me to piss my pants even though I was in front of the urinal.
this thread is a failure, ironically
The ironing is delicious
One time in primary school (I think I was in 1st grade) we had the option of going to camp for a couple of days or so. I decided to go. On the first night, I couldn't find my underwear. I was standing in the room (with the door open) wearing only a shirt, crying and yelling out to the teacher because I couldn't find my underwear. Then these two older girls came to the door to see what was going on and starting laughing and pointing at my penis. I don't remember what happened after that, but it was an unpleasant trip.
The most embarassing moment in my life was in eighth grade science class. We were studying physics and the teacher asked the class for examples of an object that was very dense. I saw an opportunity to crack a joke, but he headed it off by adding, "...and not the name of someone in the room." Crud.
So a few students raised their hands and presented non-joke examples of actual dense objects. Then our teacher proposed that someone give an example of an object that wasn't dense. The wheels of wit started turning in my head. If someone else in the room is very dense, and we want an object that isn't dense, then... I can invert the joke and say myself.
I raised my hand. The teacher called on me. I realized the joke was stupid and didn't work. I realized I had already started saying it. I stuttered, then finished. "M... m... me?"
Oh, how I wanted to be swallowed by the earth. I was clearly the dumbest person in the room at this moment. Boasting facetiously about my intellect might have been one thing, but telling a room full of my peers that I'm "not dense"? It reeks of something only a mentally challenged individual would do.
There was an awkward silence. For a second or two. Then our teacher said, "Uh... anyone else?"
I couldn't redeem myself after that, so I stayed silent for the rest of the class -- maybe the rest of the year -- and prayed everyone was too asleep to remember later what a fool I'd made of myself.
The worst part is that nobody who was in the room ever commented on the event. They must have just understood I was fucking retarded and that it was better they not give me trouble about it.
One time, my girlfriend told me that my penis smelled funny.
My kitten gets more booty than me :(