Start your online petitions here (30)

1 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5142 14:26

I petition that the Anime board be changed to the Japanimation board and the words "baka," otaku," and "pocky" be filtered to "numbnuts," "hopeless virgin," and "it's just fucking pretzels," respectively.

2 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5142 17:23

I petition that Squeeks ban >>1 for making this very stupid thread.

3 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5142 18:42

Who's Squeeks?

4 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5142 23:17

I petition that >>1 ban >>2 for not making a very stupid thread.

5 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5142 23:31

I petition, as I have before in the past, that "General" be renamed to "DQN Lite."

6 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5143 00:52

I petition that "DQN" be renamed to "General Plus."

7 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5143 03:05

I petition we partition.

8 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5143 08:57

I petition that we salute the General.

9 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5143 10:33

>>7

I petition that partition is achieved via nuclear fission.

10 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5147 00:22

I petition that, from this day forward,
Football will be officially and unofficially referred to as 'Soccer' in all contexts,
and that American Football will be referred to as 'Gridiron' in all contexts.
Usage of the word Football shall be punishable under international law.
Referring to this banned phrase in legal texts and criminal court will be avoided by calling it "the F-word".
I envision a future free from all confusion and conflict in the international lexicon.

11 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5160 01:57

I petition China to stop fucking up the environment with stuff that has been proven by repeatable experiment to be bad for us all.

12 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5160 02:00

I petition for my flying car by the year 2000

13 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5160 05:18

I petition for >>12 to quit creating temporal rifts

14 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5160 06:07

I petition to have an option added to tax forms to receive any tax returns in the form of unsalted cashews.

15 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5160 06:23

>>14

I petition for a tick-box on tax forms which completes the rest of the form with one tick.

16 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5160 09:55

Emergency being attached, doubt?

As for die gambling problem similar to a certain fair company, concerning these emergencies which are the company?
To that, is rise course of compilation order attacked because of Thursday Buddha created?
Therefore problem of the young dementia patient where me and to the storm and the market it is the bankrupt where the same company is large should be expressed.
These individual strengthening points are the same.
I am Thursday.

Am I Thursday?

17 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5161 02:49

I petition that we declare >>16 Tuesday, just to get it over with.

18 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5161 04:43

I petition for universal health care, but we shouldn't have to pay taxes to support it. Instead, the government should just pay for it for us.

19 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5161 21:03

I petition that people think up funnier stuff than actual petitions before posting to this thread.

20 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5161 21:27

I petition that politics stay in /politics/.
Also, cocks.

21 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5161 21:34

I petition that cocks stay in /asses/.

22 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5162 00:17

>>20
I petition that people get the joke in >>18. (Unfortunately, a woman actually said that to my mom, and she was dead serious.)

23 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5162 00:47

I petition anyone using "epic" to describe anything that isn't an obscenely long poem be kicked in the nuts.

24 Name: 　 : 1993-09-5162 01:41

I petition that any one that uses "epic" for an obscenely long poem that is not in some form mythology be kicked in the nuts.

25 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5162 02:41

I petition my body to produce more testosterone.

26 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5162 02:55

I petition my body to seduce more lolis.

27 Name: Not in employment, education or training. : 1993-09-5162 15:12

I petition that everyone needs their own personal million dollars, to do with what they want.

28 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5162 15:51

I petition against the massive inflation that >>27 is advocating.

29 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5162 17:29

I petition the Lord with prayer.

30 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5166 22:16

I petition that there should be color-coded warnings that advise users on the likelihood of using the emergency mittens button.

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