I'm looking for only the highest quality copypasta. I want to laugh, I want to cry. I want to listen to Bel-Air.

Day 1

Mommy, I am only 8 inches long, but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it, I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

Day 2

Mommy, today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me, you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.

Day 3

You know what Mommy, I'm a girl!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too, and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.

Day 4

Mommy, my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine, but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes, and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.

Day 5

You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?

Day 6

I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy!! HELP me!! No . . .

Day 7

Mommy, I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. he is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me Mommy? Were you scared? You could have just sent me to live with my auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.

Day 8

I pulled up to a house about seven or eight, and I yelled to the cabby "yo, homes, smell you later" Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To settle my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.

Omg hai ^___^ I’m Ai-san and I absolutely luuuv @_____@ anime <3 and my fav is naurto!!! Okies so anyways, im going to tell you about the BEST day of my life when I met my hot husband sasuke!! <333333333 OMFGZ HE WAS SOOOOO FREAKIN KAWAII IN PERSON!!! Supa kawaii desu!!!!!!!! ^______________________________________^

When I walked onto Tokyo street =^____^=I looked up and saw…SASUKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333!!!!
“ KONNICHIWA OMGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ SUPA SUPA SUPA KAWAII SASUKE-SAMA!!!!!” I yelled n____n then he turned chibi then un-chibi!!
he looked at me [O.O;;;;;;;;;;;] and then he saw how hot I am *___* he grabbed my hand and winked ~^ then pulled me behind a pocky shop o_o and started to kiss me!!!!!! [OMG!!! HIS TOUNGE TASTED LIKE RAMEN!!! RLY!! >.> <.< >.< *(^O^)* *(^O^)* *(^O^)*] then I saw some baka fat bitch watching us and I could tell she was undressing him with her eyes!!!!!!! [ -_____________-;;;;; OMG I COULDN’T BELIEVE IT EITHER!!! (òó) (òó) (òó)] so I yelled “UH UH BAKA NEKO THAT’S MY MAN WHY DON’T YOU GO HOOK UP WITH NARUTO CAUSE SASUKE-SAMA LOVES ME!!! (ò_ó)” then sasuke held me close =^____^= and said he would only ever love me and kissed me again!!!!!!! ** (O)/ then we went to his apartment and banged all night long and made 42 babies and they all became ninjas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nyaaaaa!!! (^________<) ^_________________^;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Hai =^_____^= AI-SAN heeeeeerrreee!! <3 <3 ^__<

I am SUPA SUPA HAppy today!! >____^ <333333333333333333 SASUKE IS HAPPY TOO!! OMG SUPA SUPA KAWAII ~DESU ~DESU Yay! <3 ^_^

Chances are you will see it again >.< <.< <333333333333 (^o^) because I LOOOOOOVVVVEEEE telling everybody about my HUBBYZZ SAKUKE! ((<<)- OMG! I LOVE HIM SO MUCHEEEZZ. he is so KAAAWWWAAAIIIII!!!!! ^.^ <33333333 ~desu ~desu
...
OMG! SASUKE CAME HOOMMMEE! hes home everyone !!!^^. look look, hes home ^^ <333333333333 @_@@@@@@@ ''''____-;;;;;;;;

@@ OH MY GODZZZ SASUKE IS KISSING ME ON THE NECK!!! (@@ (òó) (òó) (òó)>>) he wants to make love to me 0.0. OMG! my heart is racing a million miles an hour <333333333 Supa kawaii desu!!!!!!!! YAYYYY!! ZZZZ NYAAAA!! ^^

Bai Everyone... ME AND SASUKE ARE OFF TO MAKE MORE BABIES.. Yay Yay!!! bumpy bumpy time! Hours of fun time IN SASUKES BED..... NAKED!! OMGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ SUPA SUPA SUPA KAWAII SASUKE-SAMA!!!!! <33333333333 [O.O;;;;;;;;;;;] LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE! >__** ** (O)/ YAY! Yay! happy happy haaaaapppppppppppyyyyyy!! NEKO NEKO KAWAII SUPA supa SUPA KAWAII DESU DESU ; ) "",.._____^^ (--(

NYAAA! ^_^

Last tuesday, some time around 8:30 pm. I was in a coffee shop listening to the smooth sounds of beatnik jazz in the background while sipping a tall latte.

A girl walked in and sat at the counter and ordered a regular coffee. She looked very cute so I decided to go up and talk to her. I introduced myself to her and asked if I could sit down with her.

She looked at me puzzled for a momment. A small gust of wind passed us by and filled our silent momment.

She then kicked me in da ballz 9 millionzz times with steel plated shoes and bashed me in da skulzz with a dildo. She then cut off my ballz with hedge clippers and removed my brain and threw away my brain and put my balls in my head so I has ballz in my brain. OMG after that she took me to da gay bar and poured Gay Fuel down my neck and shoved beer bottles up my ass which was oh so Very Very Hard. She then want all Chibi and then unChibi and shouted "MUDA DA...Muda Muda Muda Muda Muda!!!
ZA WARUDO" She then threw a steamroller on me and went "WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" >: D

After that she then called Drew Pickles on her mobile phone and he apeared out of nowhere and RAPED IN IN DA AZZ 999 MILLION TIMES with his monster size peniz and made mega sploogeez all over my body. Drew Then crushed me with his monster size peniz and then Cock Mongler appeared and MONGLED MY COCK >: (

After that she made another call on her mobile and said "YOU'RE MOV'IN WITH YOUR AUNTIE AND UNCLE IN BEL-AIR" and tied me up and whistled for a taxi and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror
if anything I could say that this cab was rare but I thought man forget it yo homes to Bel-Air
I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie yo homes smell ya later
Looked at my kingdom I was finally there to sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel-Air.

After that she blowed up my kingdom and shoved more dildos up my azz and dragged me down to the local swimming pool and made me drink all the water in the pool which was mostly child pee >_<. The owners then had to close the pool with a large "POOL'S CLOSED" sign at the front and then lots of Nigra's in black suits came in and blocked me and pooped all over me.

She then took me back to where it all started and chopped off my penis and ate it with fried curry. The football team then came and beat me up and then pooped all over me and then they climbed up into my ass looking for gold and they found gold so 99 million gold minors started mining up my ass for hours and hours and hours.

She then ripped off all my skin and wrapped it over her body like a blanket and then she threw up everywhere uncontrolably and threw up my ballzz all over my face. She walked away while I lay on the ground with a large smile across her face. Then Drew Pickles appeared again and RAPED ME SOME MOOOOAAAARR!!!

>; 0..... IT HURT SO SWELL!! ^O^

I never wen't back to the coffee shop since >_<

Muda da!

MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDAA!

ZA WARUDO!!!!!!!

Toki wo Tomare!

Soshite toki ga ugoki desu! Rodo Rora da!

WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!

>: )

-proper version-

My goodness, hello there. I feel extremely pleased today. But, besides that, my name is Miss Ai, and I garner immense pleasure from the viewing of animated features originating from Japan. Enough to make me dizzy, even. Currently, the best series I have ever seen is a so-called "Lucky Star". If you don't mind listening, I'm going to recall the most wonderful day in my life - that is, when I met the most gorgeous woman in the entire world, my new wife, Konata. I love her so much. Goodness me, she was unbelievably cute in person. I can barely express her cuteness, even in a different language. She makes me so happy.

Well, anyway. Firstly, I took my first steps along the crowded streets of Tokyo, feeling almost kitten-like in excitement due to the experience. Then, all of a sudden, I looked up, and my eyes met the most wonderful sight in the world: Konata.
I do believe my heart nearly exploded from my chest at the sight.
"Good afternoon. My, my, my, you have to be the most visually appealing thing I have ever witnessed, little miss Konata," I said in my outside voice, smiling pleasantly. Before my eyes she appeared to shrink to an almost comical size, leading me to assume she was embarassed. But, never fear, she soon jumped up again.
She looked over to me, brightly beaming her trademark grin, and I imagine she must have seen something appealing in yours truly - though I could not be so narcissistic so as to suggest what! Stars were in my eyes as she slipped her hand into mine, winking with an almost sultry expression. Next - though it may have been a mite too forward - we found ourselves in a closed-off space behind a sweetened foods store, as odd as it may sound. But, then, suddenly, she put her lips to mine, and all misbegivings were lost. (Oh ho, though it may seem strange or unbelievable, her mouth still possessed the lingering taste of chocolate-flavoured ice cream. An exciting tid bit, is it not?)

My girlfriend gave me a very interesting gift to me for our anniversary. Although I do have a slight problem with it ^_^

My girlfriend called me into the bedroom on our anniversary and presented me with a small box. She was very excited as she kissed me on the cheek and urged me to open it.

I opened the box and found that it was full of PORNO!!! of my girlfriend!!!. It appears she had a little photography session by herself ; )

"Wow" I replyed in amazment. I also got an erection just from the sight of it.

But unfortuantly this was no ordinary erection... IT WAS A DREW PICKLES ERECTION!!??!!!?!?

my cock would not stop growing. It kept getting bigger and bigger until I had to open a window to let it out of the house.

My cock is now farther than my eyes can see. NASA called me on the telephone to tell me that they can see it from space and also told me...

ITS OVER NINE THOOOOUUUUUUSSSAAAAANNNNNDDDDD!!?!!?!??!!?!!

........
My girlfriend is actually a little pleased by the whole situation X D