How can I avoid being seen as just a friend or a brother by a girl?
It has happened to me before that I like this girl and then she tells me that she loves me as just a brother. :\
You're too nice. Watch anime with incest innuendo together then make your move. If it fails, become another girl's brother and try again. Rinse, repeat. It's bound to work eventually.
Girls will consider you as a friend or brother because you are simply 'nice' with them. What they want is for you to have something more than that, something they can't find in others.
>>2 lol
>>1
You can't provide what those girls are looking for. Maybe you're shallow in your own choices.
I am starting to think maybe >>5 is right. Maybe all this stuff about being too nice isn't really true. it's not that we're too nice, it's just we don't have whatever it is they're looking for. the two nice thing is just something we're telling ourselves to keep our egos somewhat intact. there is no law of equal trade in life. life isn't fair. maybe we're not so much too nice as just losers.
>>6
Actually, you are both. However, there are a lot of losers with girlfriends while the number of guys that are too nice with girlfriends are far fewer. True story.
Don't be friends with someone you want to be more than friends with. That's plain dishonest.
>>8
Therein lies the problem of friendzone. Girls think its possible to be just friends with guys, and in their own ignorance hurt them because they think the guy thinks like them. Almost every guy on the planet seeks more than just being friends with any girl. It all comes down to a fundamental mistake both sides make: they think that the opposite sex thinks like them. A lot of it comes down to the girls playing with men's hearts without even knowing it. And there are plenty of clever ones (attention whores) who know exactly whats up, but keep playing the game for their own amusement.
My advice is keep looking, you'll find someone more compatible some day. You shouldn't have to change who you are or how you act just to get a girl, unless you've got some REAL issues (aka don't be like densha otoko)
Maybe I'm special or some shit, but I have several female friends none of whom I have ever liked "that way". That doesn't prevent me from having occasionally involving them in my masturbation fantasies when my gf is out of the country working, however.
>>11
Not disturbing, I do that too. With basically all of my female friends. I don't think I'd ever lay them IRL.
>>10 A chill went up my spine when I read that.
>>13 same here. It is disrespectful to them even though you only use your own images of them. Plus, who's to say it won't affect the way you look at them negatively
I guess they'd never know anyways
>>1
Dude I'd love to know, I'm always ending up in the dreaded friend zone myself.
>>10
Ditto
>>15
I think it's complimentary to their sexual attractiveness. We'd be pretty sad to look at them negatively since it would be our own base urges so we should only look negatively at ourselves.
>>9
It's ok to change, the reason many of us here are single is our reluctance to change and take chances. Apparently guys with scraggy beards and hair like myself are just not what women are looking for...who knew!!!
>are just not what women are looking for
Just like all Germans eat sausage.
>>9
can someone actually support this?
guys and girls can just be friends right? at least that's what it seems like from a girl's perpective. do guys really look for more than friendship when they befriend a girl??
A guy can only be "just" friends with a girl when he doesn't find her attractive - that is at least my case. Some guys try to get friendly with a girl before they dare anything further like asking for a date or tell her that they like her etc.
>>19 I'm sure it differs from guy to guy. If the guy is particularly desperate for a relationship, that may very well be the case. Some guys will want to date a girl just because she's pretty, or sometimes just because she pays attention to him, but there are also guys who are smarter (and/or pickier) who will only date girls who are their "type." I have many female friends who I have never considered dating even though I am sexually attracted to them, because we have nothing in common and it simply wouldn't work.
But "do guys really look for more than friendship when they befriend a girl??" Some do, some don't, some befriend girls to see if they should look for more than friendship when they get to know you better.
>>1
Short answer: Be an asshole.
Long answer: http://www.laddertheory.com/
>>23
ladder theory is for misogynist losers who just can't get laid
simple answer: When you go out with a girl, make it damn clear it's to go out on a date.
>>25
And get her out on a date before you get to know her well; use the dating to get to know one another. If you're realising you want a serious relationship with someone and you haven't even been on a date with them yet, you're doing it wrong.
If from the dating you realise you're incompatible (it only takes one of you to realise this), it's easy to back off and become good friends. But if you've already been good friends and you try to upgrade, you're unlikely to get a shot at being friends again if it doesn't work out.
The idea that girls can't be just friends with guys is total bullshit. I have more guy friends than I have female friends and at most there are 2 who I am capable of thinking of as more than just friends. I don't even masturbate thinking about the good looking ones or anything like that.
>>27
Here's a fun experiment to try: sometime late at night, give your guy friends a ring and say that you are unbearably horny and ask if they'll bang you. Make it clear that you are going to get the cock from somebody no matter what, even if they decline. You will find that the only ones that wouldn't say yes are either gay, too afraid of screwing up a relationship they're in, or think you're ugly. No exceptions.
Do a Barrel Roll.
OK NOOB,
You have to learn to be strait forward with women. They like to play the games, they don't like YOU to play the games on them. You must show her exactly how you feel in a pseudo-machismo/emotional way (depending on her mood.) You need to take a gdamned risk. Girls like it when you stick your neck out on the line for them. Lay it out on the table with confidence. Find a way to gear yourself up so you can be confident. Think of the bigger picture of life, and how your life does not end no matter what the outcome.!
>>30
True story. Challenge to any girls here: Try this and report back. If you find even one exception to the rule I'll suck your cock.
>>34
I see what you did there
>>10
Dude, one time I was hanging out with some female friends and they asked me if I beat off while thinking about any of them. I told them honestly that I did, and they ate it up... and 2 admitted that they fapped while thinking of me before...
So, it all works out.