I´m not able to ask her for a date. I don´t have much to offer her. (15)

1 Name: Cobremont : 2006-09-03 16:37 ID:szIEozXi

Hello, mates.
I will tell you what my story is about. I´m looking for advice.
It all started in October last year. I was working with quite an unstable type of contract that meant that I should get fired and rehired every two weeks and get paid by check every two wekks(that improved now, now I have a permanent contract and get paid directly to my account). This was making me to go to my bank´s branch with the check every two weeks to get it earned.
One day I went into the branch and found that a new cashier had been hired. She was so beauty! I remember I was late for something and that means I wanted to be given a fast and reliable service, but the girl was new and had no clue on how to pay me the check. She spent some time trying to find it out and finally had to ask for help, leading to further delays.
I usually would get annoyed by it, but this time was different. I thought that was cute or something. I did´t matter at all that waiting. I left the branch smiling, so happy.
During the next months I did a lot of visits to the branch because of the checks. I even stopped using the cash machine to get into the branch in order to see her. She was a disaster, she would forget to give me receipts, she would spend time thinking how that was to be done... I usually get annoyed by this things. In this cases I didn´t.
I liked her, but I didn´t take it too seriously, I didn´t realice it. I just started thinking: oh well, maybe some day I can ask her for a coffee.
It´s changed now. Now I know I´m in love. Now I want to ask her. Here´s when the problems arise.
During this time I have seen her, not only in the branch, but a couple of times walking to a bar for breakfast with his boss. I think that maybe they were going out with each other, but some months ago the personnel of the branch was changed and the man dissapeared.
When I go to the branch I feel she is allways very kind to me, she calls me for my name and, well I don´t know to to explain it, I feel that that kindness is far more than the usual kindness you give to a normal client.
I´ve never been on any relationship, somehow I have allways been waiting to find the perfect woman. I know she is no perfect (I´m aware she is really far from that), bUt I really like her anyways. I´m too shy too, have no real contact with women since five years ago. I´ve been living just for my studies and my job.
I´ve had her a couple of times alone in the branch, the perfect oportunity to ask her but I couldn´t. So after that I thought that I could get to the place where she has breakfast and ask her there, but I just found she meets there with some friends. Some really nice looking friends. They are succesful people with probably a great paid, a BMW and they get home at night fresh and smelling well.
I´m the opposite. I could have had all that things but I had a lot of problems three years ago and now I have little money, a monthly underground pass and smell sweat when I get home tired and dirty after work.
I feel she is like a princess and is sorrounded by all that beautifull people, that I could do nothing to get her. I can´t compete. I´ve been trying to see her in the street in her way to breakfast and ask her, but time after time I think I cannot do it. I´m afraid of been rejected and seem ridicolous. I fear also, if she accepts to go with me for some coffee, to not to be able to be what she looks for and fall short of her expectatives.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-03 16:40 ID:EtOsQE3C

all the answers to all of the threads in this forum are the same.

just ask her. see what happens, take the chance. no one is as perfect as they seem.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-03 20:55 ID:Heaven

>>2
!!

agreed.. everyone is having difficulties with asking..

just FORCE yourself to.
if you won't do it you'll be wandering with this forever!
and with waiting.. she might just be dissapeared at a day...
keep that in mind. that's mayb the last time ever u see her because she's leaving. that will bring up enough courage I hope ^^

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-04 02:21 ID:r0sL5x8E

>I feel she is like a princess and is sorrounded by all that beautifull people, that I could do nothing to get her. I can´t compete.

BIG MISTAKE. You are putting her on a pedestal, that is probably the worst thing you can ever do. Think about it she is a cashier at a bank and she is having trouble there. Let's just say she isn't the brightest person in the world. So she has sucessful friends, who cares. You are a hard worker; in college and you have a job, you will probably be better off than they will in 5 years.

Next time you go to the bank, just ask her out for some coffee. After you finish with your business just say ask her, and be real casual about it too. If you are calm, you will appear calm. Also don't worry about her expectations, just be yourself. Goodluck.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-04 04:38 ID:5YfnOTk3

Women are meant to be conquered

They already know this and you still have yet to learn.

They won't say it, they may even deny it, but women are like philly mustangs in the wild.

They have to be tamed and dominated.

That doesn't mean call her bitch. That doesn't mean hit her. It doesn't mean insult her or take advantage of her.

It means she wants a man to come along, take her, and choose her.

There are no princesses. There are no queens. When you act like women are better than you, then you will find yourself very unsuccessful. If you put her on a pedestal you will undermine yourself every time.

You are basing your expectations on what TV and Movies think love is. That's a false exaggeration of reality. Here is how it happens. You see something you like, you go talk to her, if you still remain interested after actually talking to her, continue. Don't be needy, don't be possessive. You like what you see. You are doing your job. Her job was to be attractive.

You are the bee, she is the flower. It is up to you to fly over and pollinate.

It doesn't get that much simpler than that. If you want to give up, fine.

I've done both. I've had relationships with women. All of them I liked, none of them I "loved" i.e. wanted to base my whole life around. I've also withdrawn from society and bought an almost 8 grand Hotaru Real Doll. It was fun for a while. Iraq really did mess me up more than I thought and I really didn't think that it did. It wasn't so much "the field" or anything. I think I did it to compensate for something else in life. I went over pissed, came back pissed. Had the money for something real(i.e. an awesome Barrett) sulked and bought a doll that take s up space. Accepted Jesus. No use for it. It's a neat little thing I guess, and I Love Hotaru. But for like, 30 dollars I could have just gotten a little Model Kit and put on my desk or something.

I digress. You have to really have confidence in yourself. If not yourself, then your abilities. It's a constant battle.

Whether you get the girl or not. Whether you end up liking her or not. It's important to do this for at least yourself.

As long as you are above ground, alive, and thinking. You still have time. With time, comes everything.

Remember that.

6 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-09-04 05:42 ID:ptDfhK5s

Well if you think your in love go for it. But I would suggest you "ACTUALLY" get to know her better! For all you know she could be a stupid skank that uses people! Believe me, I know.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-04 05:52 ID:K0nsMiXe

>>5
it's good to see you again, favorite 4-ch poster

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-04 05:57 ID:66wtueiE

JEWS

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-04 05:57 ID:66wtueiE

JEWS

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-04 05:57 ID:66wtueiE

JEWS

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-05 07:07 ID:Dajhx3uZ

There ought to be more men like >>5

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-05 09:24 ID:/S9g5B4c

Juice!

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-05 16:54 ID:JHAS0UJO

>>5

Very materialistic point of view.
I'd stay away from it.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-05 18:40 ID:UHrAuD9O

>>5

Very realistic point of view
I'd would heed it.

15 Name: Agro_dka : 2006-09-05 20:47 ID:1vfVjVR1

That's bullshit.

If you are interested in her, and you think that she might be interested in you, then go for it. If not, move on. There's probably someone out there waiting for you, and you are stuck on someone who may not reciprocate.

Do it, or move on.

This thread has been closed. You cannot post in this thread any longer.