Why do girls dump nice guys and go for the jerks? (185)

1 Name: Lloyd : 2006-11-22 07:40 ID:Ba6WKIYP

This is the ultimate law... Girls always whine about they want a nice guy who cares for them. But when it comes to choose their boyfriend they always fell for the jerk who treats them like shit. Why does it have to be like this? Why don't girls like nice guys? It's just not logical...
What do jerks have that nice guys don't? And why isn't niceness and calm personality appealing to girls?
I just don't get it... I'm romantic, calm, and nice to everybody. I can talk with girls, and can be friends with anybody... but nothing more. They tell me that I'm nice, cute and so, and they just don't get why can't I find somebody.
But it seems like girls don't see nice guys as a possible boyfriend...
What can a nice guy do?

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-22 09:06 ID:cFL+N4Wn

Guys to the exact same thing to nice girls, they dump them for the nagging, gold digging bitch who is completely insensitive to his needs.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-22 10:32 ID:2UMEEjzA

Confidence, ego, a bit of raw masculine oomph. Girls want a guy who can make them tingle, they want emotion. Be that sadness or joy, that's what they like. A 'nice guy' doesn't give them that. You don't have to be a jerk, you just have to make sure that nobody ever calls you "nice".

4 Name: Lloyd : 2006-11-22 12:08 ID:Ba6WKIYP

If they'd want emotion, then I wouldn't be alone...

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-22 13:30 ID:GF1UrWOM

>>3
Yeah, this is true. I make no secret of the fact that I'm an arrogant self absorbed asshole, and I don't really have a problem with girls. A lot of it is confidence, which is very important, and also the fact that a jerk will usually make a move when a nice guy wouldn't. They make more opportunities for themselves to get girls.

To be fair though, jerks are more likely to have short meaningless relationships or veeery long and bitter ones. The nice guys will have the decent relationships. At least, that's what I've always seen, and experienced myself. Hell, one of my friends had a great relationship (I mean, it changed his life) with a girl that I'd insensitively gotten rid of.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-22 21:23 ID:neT42myX

>>4

Yeah nice guys are more likely to have long stable relationships. But if you can't get the girl in the first place there is no point. A balance is need to found between the jerk and nice guy.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-22 22:28 ID:/cAfkpCE

>>1

If you have to ask, you'll never know.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-22 23:01 ID:5HBUJJRI

>>1

Women are just bitches. That's all. When you realize that, you can plan and act accordingly.

Besides "Nice guys" are usually creepy.

Most women(who are bitches) would rather go out with a guy who hits her, gets drunk, and is a complete ass than go out with a guy who is creepy.

People are more apt to put up with abusive and rude than they are creepy. Creepy is scary because there's no real way to deal with creepy. Abusive and rude is usually just leave the SOB when he's at work or fucking around.

CREEPY guys are like herpes they show up at your work, at your parents house, they go around telling people you are still together and possibly getting married...SOON. They start wanting to name kids in the middle of the first date.

Actually...shit -I- would rather go out with an abusive asshole than a creepy "nice guy" myself.

I'm not really creepy, I'm more eccentric and bizarre. If done right that can be sexy.

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-23 18:18 ID:WCehRkjE

>Besides "Nice guys" are usually creepy.

so true. creepy isn't just a stumbling point for love relationships, it's a stumbling point for getting to know ANYBODY because nobody wants to hang with the guy that unsettles everybody. and there isn't really a cure for creepy except for seeing that shit in yourself and trying to fix it. like, say, not declaring your eternal and undying love to girls you don't know (from one frequent /love/ example).

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-23 19:50 ID:zY9cglOR

Stop being so nice, end of story.

That's not going to get you anywhere. Don't go out of your way to help a girl when you're in the middle of an Escaflowne episode. Stop being so considerate, if you want to say something, say it, regardless if it offends her or not. Don't spend all day talking on the phone with her, you got shit to do. Don't give all of your time to her, have a life of your own. This will let her know you are off doing your own thing instead of sitting around and catering to a girl, which you should never do.

Girls see nice and sensitive guys as just friends. I'm not saying you have to be a complete asshole, but you have to let the girl know that you won't always be available, and once she becomes annoying you're moving on to the next one.

11 Name: James : 2006-11-23 19:58 ID:5NwPy+87

hi, i have a problem, this girl and i went to the same school till grade 12 and now i am in a different city then she is. i have liked her since grade 10, thats when i moved to her city but i was afraid to tell her anything, now that i am here in a different city, i have really started to miss her. it is a little bit hard to say if she likes me or not, everytime i am in her town and give her a call, she would invite me over to her place and stuff. we really haven't hung out at all. i just dont know where to start. heard that messenger is the worst way of talking, so i have actually quit using my aim. if anyone of you can help me with this. would be greatly appriciated. and yeh another thing is, i would like her to be my soul mate for the rest of my life. i know this sounds creepy too but thats what i feel about her. please help.
thank you

12 Name: James : 2006-11-23 20:00 ID:5NwPy+87

hi, i have a problem, this girl and i went to the same school till grade 12 and now i am in a different city then she is. i have liked her since grade 10, thats when i moved to her city but i was afraid to tell her anything, now that i am here in a different city, i have really started to miss her. it is a little bit hard to say if she likes me or not, everytime i am in her town and give her a call, she would invite me over to her place and stuff. we really haven't hung out at all. i just dont know where to start. heard that messenger is the worst way of talking, so i have actually quit using my aim. if anyone of you can help me with this. would be greatly appriciated. and yeh another thing is, i would like her to be my soul mate for the rest of my life. i know this sounds creepy too but thats what i feel about her. please help.
thank you

13 Name: James : 2006-11-23 20:00 ID:5NwPy+87

hi, i have a problem, this girl and i went to the same school till grade 12 and now i am in a different city then she is. i have liked her since grade 10, thats when i moved to her city but i was afraid to tell her anything, now that i am here in a different city, i have really started to miss her. it is a little bit hard to say if she likes me or not, everytime i am in her town and give her a call, she would invite me over to her place and stuff. we really haven't hung out at all. i just dont know where to start. heard that messenger is the worst way of talking, so i have actually quit using my aim. if anyone of you can help me with this. would be greatly appriciated. and yeh another thing is, i would like her to be my soul mate for the rest of my life. i know this sounds creepy too but thats what i feel about her. please help.
thank you

14 Name: James : 2006-11-23 20:03 ID:5NwPy+87

sorry about that. i am not sure why it posted three times.. no idea..

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-23 20:14 ID:zY9cglOR

Shit man, you guys are in a different city which makes things really difficult. I would try calling her a bit, ask her how her life's going and just try to become friends again. If you're in a different city chances are you two have grown apart and not as close as you were. If the conversation is good, just keep calling her, but not too often, maybe once a week. Then she'll probably start calling you and tell her how her life is going, which would be very good.

I wouldn't recommend using messenger at all. It's pretty gay.

Don't tell her you love her or anything shit like that. That will creep her out.

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-23 20:57 ID:w1VqMaGo

the whole thing makes me sick. so much of a bother, we got better things to do. just dont lose sleep over these things, if theres anything you should be losing sleep over, you should be losing it over where youre going in life. in total that is

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-23 20:58 ID:neT42myX

I would say you try to maintain a friendship, even if it is a weak one. But I don't expect anything to happen, since the distance will be a huge factor.

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-23 22:57 ID:/eTf49pw

Loud jerks don't scare girls, nice, quiet guys do.

D:

19 Name: James : 2006-11-24 14:21 ID:5NwPy+87

i see what you mean.. another thing i was wondering too, i have heard that relationship with her parents is very crucial.. is that correct?.

20 Name: yuka : 2006-11-24 14:37 ID:qOQE0kFd

>>18 That's not true! I'm a girl and loud jerks scare me! I actually prefer the nice, and quiet type of guy.

21 Name: James : 2006-11-24 15:16 ID:5NwPy+87

i hope that the girl i like thinks like you do.. would make life that much easier.

22 Name: yuka : 2006-11-24 15:20 ID:qOQE0kFd

>>21
well, there are some girls that are like that, and we can't avoid it, can we?

most girls are not like me though.

23 Name: James : 2006-11-24 15:37 ID:5NwPy+87

well you are a girl... what do girls like the most about guys?

what do girls usually want from guys?

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-24 15:47 ID:3iuI07aI

Girls really don't know what they want, this is why the nice guys get to listen the the girls who like "funny, kind, sensitive guys" compain about their crude, violent, manly man when he's a jerk to her.

25 Name: yuka : 2006-11-24 15:58 ID:qOQE0kFd

Well, some girls want love from guys. I wouldn't know, really. I don't even know how I got together with my boyfriend! Although, I did complain to him about my ex when we got together..

We girls want attention, I guess. I'm not sure myself. (x_x)

26 Name: James : 2006-11-24 16:16 ID:5NwPy+87

see i am willing to give attention too but then if you give too much attention, then girls freak out and think we are all creepy .

27 Name: yuka : 2006-11-24 16:17 ID:qOQE0kFd

Not unless the girl is interested in you

28 Name: James : 2006-11-24 16:21 ID:5NwPy+87

true.. see she has never told me that at all but then last time i talked to her was like atleast 3 - 4 months ago. and i dont know how to start a conversation after such a long period of time.

29 Name: yuka : 2006-11-24 16:22 ID:qOQE0kFd

You can start by asking how she is. Like a simple, 'How are you? It's been a long time since we last talked to one another.'

Something simple like this can work.

30 Name: James : 2006-11-24 16:48 ID:5NwPy+87

i see. as i dont know her as much i dont know what i should be talking about. so sometimes there is silence which makes me really nervous.

31 Name: Strawberry Cake : 2006-11-24 19:01 ID:/Y/6BRzm

Girls don't really go for jerk guys... at least I don't. Just a few of the guys I've dated have been rather jerkish to other people.. and when they've been jerkish to me, I've tossed them to the side.

Confidence has something to do with it. And you don't have be to a jerk to have confidence. And while you don't have to spend every waking moment on the girl, giving her some attention doesn't hurt. Otherwise why bother with a girlfriend, huh?

The type of guys I like are the geeky ones.. who're nice and fun to talk to.

32 Name: yuka : 2006-11-25 00:06 ID:JzvLOK5q

>>31 We have the same taste in guys

>>30 Why don't you ask people about this girl?

33 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-25 01:12 ID:LG5asc4v

Being a nice guy won't get you anywhere. This is coming from an ex nice guy.

You're caught in the mindset that if you're nice to people, they'll like you. The nicer you are, the more they'll like you. Are they being mean? Well shit, you're just not being nice enough then!

This is wrong. So very wrong. It's usually an excuse to avoid conflict, either the guilt of being mean, or the fear of someone possibly being mean to you in return.

If you're nice to everyone, they'll just walk all over you. Male, female, irrelivant.

If you don't learn how to be mean within context, and to stand up for yourself, you're just going to be weak for the rest of your life. You'll never get anything you really want.

If you're nice to everyone, and you have a girlfriend, then she's probably just as pathetic as you are. You'll end up satiating each others existance, and neither of you will grow.

Girls want to attach themselves to someone who can provide, someone who (they see) is strong, and can deal with things so they don't have to. They can argue this point ad infinitum, but human basic instinct/primal drive will always win out in the end. Guys will always initially favour the pretty girl.

Learn this, the modify it to fit your own behavour. The more you cry about hopelessness, the closer it gets.

34 Name: yuka : 2006-11-25 01:32 ID:JzvLOK5q

>>33 you're very right about that. But don't forget that there are nice people who don't use other nice people too.

35 Name: Hanyuu : 2006-11-25 10:03 ID:sQ0cx1fa

>>33
Agreed. Totally agreed. If your personality is to be nice, that's great and all, but when it comes down to it, standing up for someone (including yourself, or others) requires you to be "nice" to one side. Basically, you pick and choose, and frankly, one shouldn't choose the jerk over the nice guy (though there are times when you wouldn't pick either >_>;;).

36 Name: James : 2006-11-25 15:53 ID:5NwPy+87

yeh i see what you mean. i am planning to give her a call tonight.. one thing i was wondering.. i got in a car accident last tuesday, we hit a transport tractor. my whole life flashed upon my eyes. i dont have anyone in my life, like no parents or siblings, and only thought about her all that time i was in the hospital. should i be telling her all that or is that too creepy..

37 Name: yuka : 2006-11-25 16:38 ID:ehTyDR/A

Well, I wouldn't be freaked out if I was the girl. In fact, I'd be worried sick! But think of it this way. If you do call her and tell her that you were thinking about her the whole time you were in the hospital, don't you think you're already confessing your love to her?

I know it's what you want, but think about it too.

(I'm not making any sense at all.)

38 Name: Neko : 2006-11-25 16:48 ID:HhJCV1ZT

Call her now!! Tell her everything..

39 Name: yuka : 2006-11-25 16:52 ID:ehTyDR/A

>>38 YES!!!

(Augh it's almost 1am and I'm so tireeeeeed~)

40 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-25 16:52 ID:mWuI3Wl2

>>36
Don't lay all that on her. You are putting her in a tough situation telling her you don't have anyone else, almost like you're forcing her to be with you. Wait until you get back on your feet and than try to talk with her.

41 Name: Neko : 2006-11-25 16:57 ID:HhJCV1ZT

It not forcing people. It just a phone call to express his feeling to her!!

42 Name: James : 2006-11-25 17:00 ID:5NwPy+87

yeh i dont want her to feel obligated to talk to me or be with me.. so i guess i will call her but i will not tell her what i felt when i was in the hospital.. is it a good idea to tell her that she can come over to my place whenever she wishes to?.

43 Name: Neko : 2006-11-25 17:04 ID:HhJCV1ZT

Ok with me. It your choice.

44 Name: Mikhail : 2006-11-25 17:10 ID:qSOcWf5Q

This is how it is yo

You just gotta give it to her straight up, say listen, I'm crazy about you, we've known each other for a long time, I don't know if you're interested in me like that or not, but I've really missed you and feel like you're a big part of my life. Just let it come from the heart. If you read all these posts and shit and try to base all your decisions on like a million diff opinions its gonna make you more frustrated. Life's too short to live in fear of rejection all the damn time.

Don't come off all desperate and shit, just give it out plain vanilla, man. Ladies appreciate you being straight up with em.

45 Name: Neko : 2006-11-25 17:15 ID:HhJCV1ZT

Are you sure bout it?

46 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-11-25 17:26 ID:ATRjDnJd

>>42
Don't you think it would be nicer to ask her out?

But inviting her to your place is fine too. Clean up your place when she does come over.

47 Name: James : 2006-11-25 18:31 ID:5NwPy+87

i see.. well i am at work right now..lol.. i'll call her when i get home i think.. the only thing that scares me is if we start going out and then break up.. that will shatter me really bad.. thats what scares me.. especially because of the distance..

48 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-25 19:16 ID:ATRjDnJd

>>47

It's too early to think about that, don't you think?

49 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-25 19:22 ID:neT42myX

>>47

You are afraid of her breaking up with you and you don't even have her as a girlfriend. Hey stupid, go some balls, ask her out and build a relationship and then worry about losing her.

50 Name: James : 2006-11-25 19:48 ID:5NwPy+87

lol.. cool.. my birthday is coming soon.. is there any action i should do for that

51 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-25 20:20 ID:ATRjDnJd

>>50

I think the answer is too obvious.

HINT: Birthday party.
HINT2: Invitations
HINT3: HER.

And how soon is soon? A 1-2 weeks, or a few months?

52 Name: James : 2006-11-25 20:43 ID:5NwPy+87

its on december 4th, so like a week.

53 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-26 00:16 ID:2UMEEjzA

>>36 Saying something like "I have nobody" puts her in a really awkward situation, like when someone says "....my cat died." and they aren't quite sure what to say to try and cheer you up. I wouldn't bring it up if I were you, near death experiences aren't exactly fun to hear about.

54 Name: yuka : 2006-11-26 02:47 ID:yV2MGX9R

>>51

That's right! That's right! Invite her to your party and tell her your feelings!!!

>>53

But if he says his near death experience to her, don't you think she would say something like "I'm glad you didn't die", "I'm glad you're safe.", etc etc~ Don't you think?

55 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-26 21:50 ID:mVzzZ5mu

>>54 Maybe, but we aren't trying to get him to feel all warm and fuzzy, we want her to be attracted by him. I just can't see "I almost died" being a turn on for most people.

Of course, I'm just imagining myself in that situation, and I'm no girl. So who knows.

56 Name: James : 2006-11-27 14:05 ID:5NwPy+87

yeh i see, well i think its kinda stupid to say that i almost died but it might not be a bad idea to tell her that i got in a crash and was literaly under the trailer. i dont think i should tell her about me being all by myself and stuff yet.. i will called her sunday, she was not home. i didnt try calling again because it was kinda too late. i will try calling tonight after work to see if i can get a hold of her.. should i say something like " i was planning to come over to (her town) and pay you a visit but i was in an accident and havent felt great since to be leaving my place for a long drive." do you guys think that would be okay or is that kinda stupid. and then we can talk about other stuff as well and tell her i got my new place and stuff like that.

57 Name: James : 2006-11-27 14:10 ID:5NwPy+87

i just read my last message and i wrote " I WILL CALLED HER SUNDAY". sorry i meant " I called her sunday "

58 Name: yuka : 2006-11-28 06:48 ID:FWDPLVNz

Okay! Be sure to tell us what happens okay? We'll be waiting for an answer!

59 Name: James : 2006-11-28 14:00 ID:5NwPy+87

i called last night.. her dad answered.. her parents know me pretty well.. they asked how i was and stuff. i didnt tell them about the accident. i didnt know if i should... she wasnt home again. she was at her friends studying for her test.. so told them to tell her i called to see how she was..

60 Name: James : 2006-11-28 20:14 ID:5NwPy+87

hey another thing i was wondering, she does not have my new phone number.. should i just give it to her saying that hey, i got my new place and here is my phone # or what is the best way of giving it.. or should i not even bother..

61 Name: BS : 2006-11-29 01:06 ID:9nnfDK3f

I think you should give it to her.

BTW, if OP is still here, do you happen to play D2?

62 Name: yuka : 2006-11-29 11:33 ID:BJygEcBF

>>61 yes you should. :3 your way of telling her your phone number works too.

63 Name: James : 2006-11-29 13:53 ID:5NwPy+87

k i called her last night again and there was no answer again.. should i call tonight as well or should i give it a break and call her on the weekend?

64 Name: yuka : 2006-11-29 14:29 ID:BJygEcBF

Weekend is good. At least the both of you will be free!

65 Name: James : 2006-11-29 15:01 ID:5NwPy+87

it is so tempting to call her like tonight again but i will wait till the weekend..

66 Name: bellaluna : 2006-11-30 10:45 ID:zVgKf7HB

girls like "jerks" so to speak - cuz they usually have a lot of charisma and a "take her or leave her" attitude. Girls like the challenge of someone who is "hard to get". Nice guys are always there waiting desperately for a girl to notice them. She knows you are calling her and meh whatever.

67 Name: James : 2006-11-30 13:53 ID:5NwPy+87

right... should i be calling her on her cell or her home phone?.. which one is preferable?

68 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-11-30 16:45 ID:3+yng497

>>67
*slaps forehead

69 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-11-30 17:54 ID:Vhd/sVqv

How about both if you can't reach her?

70 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-01 11:43 ID:j0BXuQu5

HERE IS THE REAL TRUTH AS TO WHY GIRLS LIKE JERKS.

Truth: girls want jerks for early, short term relationships. They want to marry and grow old with nice guys. What this means is, their impulse is to date jerks, but their logical mind if they are planning for the rest of their life is to date nice guys

WHY IS THIS YOU ASK?

Truth: Because it is an evolutionary mechanism built in to women. Genetically speaking, girls want the strongest, fittest male to impregnant them. This will give their genes the greatest chance of passing on and surviving when the child is born and ages. (Face it, in the world humans came from, the jerks would survive better than the nice guys, generally).

However, girls don't JUST want strong jerks, because they would make terrible fathers. They would be more likely to neglect the child, to cheat, and to hurt the mother. Because of THIS, having a jerk raise your kid is a bad idea, so women look for the nice guy to live with and raise their kids. Ideally from an evolutionary standpoint, a women is impregnated a few times by jerks, then she marries a nice guy who raises the kids with care and attention. Thus the kids get the best of both worlds.

This is shown without question with testing. Women are much more likely to pick a 'jerk' over a 'nice guy' during the days of a month they are fertile, for example. Women pick different men for one night stands and short term relationships than they do for long term ones. They have tested brain waves in different situations to back this up, and there are many more experiments of the like. Heck, this exact behavior is very well tested and documented in lower intelligence life forms.

But hey, while you just have countless eons of evolution working against you, at least humans are smart enough to make rational choices not based on genetic makeup and some women will make better choices because of it.

71 Name: James : 2006-12-01 14:46 ID:5NwPy+87

interesting... well the girl i am after then probably does want a jerk as we both are in our teenage... could it be like i pretend to be a jerk but when she grows out of being with a jerk i could show her who i really am and have a chance of having long-term relationship with her..?

72 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-01 15:17 ID:j0BXuQu5

>>71
Don't be so quick, although girls do have a natural urge to follow the above mentioned formula, there is still a ton of varience among them as you might expect. The best bet is to be self-confident, cocky, but understanding and honest. Living a lie won't help in the long run, and probably won't work either.

I can't tell you how often one of my friends has come up with the plan "I don't really want to date this girl anymore or have her be attached to me, so I'm just going to pretend they are one of the guys and talk about all that rape, racism, illegal stuff around her like I do when she isn't around" only to have the girl fall totally in love with them because of it.

Well, it's been at least two or three times. But point being, be honest, cocky, and totally self confident in your attitude. That doesn't mean be a jerk.

73 Name: James : 2006-12-01 15:26 ID:5NwPy+87

i think i am starting to understand more stuff now.. basically, show her that she does mean a lot to me but i dont need her to live my life..

74 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-01 20:28 ID:j0BXuQu5

It's the best you can do. If you stop to think about it, it's exactly the truth also

75 Name: James : 2006-12-02 15:39 ID:5NwPy+87

called her last night again... no answer...

76 Name: James : 2006-12-04 14:36 ID:5NwPy+87

is it better to call her later in the night time or in the evening.. she does go to college.. i have been calling her around 9:00 pm - 10:00pm.. and i am wondering if that is too late.. should i call her as soon as i get home which is around 6:00pm..

77 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-12-04 17:30 ID:Vhd/sVqv

>>76

Happy birthday Sunderland.

Anyway, maybe yeah, it is kinda too late. Try to call her around seven or eight.

78 Name: James : 2006-12-04 17:57 ID:5NwPy+87

Thank you.. i turned 19..lol.. i am kinda excited but scared too..lol.. last year of teenage.. yeh i will try calling her around seven.. do you think it is a good idea to tell her that it is my birthday and i am coming to her town to hang around with my friends, and ask her if she would like to come along.. or is it kinda too early to ask her to go anywhere with me at this point.

79 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-12-04 18:01 ID:Vhd/sVqv

>>78

Christ ask her out already. I mean you have been planning this for like FOREVER. This is ofcourse that she answers the phone.

80 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-05 02:41 ID:Heaven

19...eh? are you in college?

81 Name: James : 2006-12-05 13:35 ID:5NwPy+87

no actually, i work for apple.. i am just trying to save up some money to go to college next year..
by the way.. i called last night again, her mom answered. she wasnt home again, i left my new phone number and her mom said she will let her daughter know. her mom and i talked for like 15 mins. i asked her how everyone was and stuff, she said everyone was fine.. she asked me what i am doing now adays. told her where i work and stuff.. she sounded like she was "happy to hear my voice" maybe.. i just felt very welcomed by her... so i dont know..

82 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-05 19:09 ID:PbJMy0v9

You called her many times and she hasn't picked up. I think she maybe trying to avoid you. Or she doesn't live at home because she goes to college.

83 Name: James : 2006-12-05 19:20 ID:5NwPy+87

well i talked to her mom and she said she lives there still.. maybe she is trying to avoid me.. but then again.. everytime i am in here town.. she tells me to go over to her place for a coffee.. i am so confused

84 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-05 22:12 ID:j0BXuQu5

>>83

Don't assume anything by how often someone answers their phone or is at home. If she doesn't want to talk to you, let her say it herself, but if she wants you to go to her place for a coffee, then unless something happened she isn't trying to avoid you.

85 Name: James : 2006-12-06 14:13 ID:5NwPy+87

thats what i thought.. if she was avoiding me, then she would not be so nice and invite me over all the time.. i will call her tonight again.. man i have so bad luck. first i was in a car accident..yesterday, while changing my tire, my jack broke and the car fell on my hand.. lol.. its like i am cursed by the car...

86 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-06 19:28 ID:Heaven

stop calling her every night. wait for a few weeks and then give her a call.

87 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-06 19:43 ID:Seu08Y0I

James, how many times have you attempted to call her so far?

Also, how's your hand? That accident with your hand sounds pretty serious.

88 Name: James : 2006-12-06 19:59 ID:5NwPy+87

um i have called her around 4 - 5 times..

hand is okay.. i broke my wrist and crushed me fingers.. lol.. not that bad i guess.. as i said.. cursed by the car...lol

89 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-06 20:03 ID:PbJMy0v9

sell that piece of shit.

90 Name: James : 2006-12-06 20:04 ID:5NwPy+87

lol i thought about it but its the nicest car i've had..

91 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-06 21:03 ID:j0BXuQu5

4-5 times in how many days?

92 Name: James : 2006-12-06 21:22 ID:5NwPy+87

like 3 weeks...

93 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-06 22:27 ID:Heaven

around 2-3 weeks

94 Name: James : 2006-12-06 22:44 ID:5NwPy+87

yep..

95 Name: yuka : 2006-12-07 01:27 ID:5pjh++QF

at least you're making progress! :D

96 Name: James : 2006-12-07 13:59 ID:5NwPy+87

lol... i havent called in like 3 days now so i think i might call tonight..

97 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-07 17:53 ID:Heaven

ah...desperation

98 Name: James : 2006-12-07 18:42 ID:5NwPy+87

if i tell her about what happened to my hand, she might think that i have the worst luck and might not want to be with me.

99 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-07 21:31 ID:Heaven

well if she is that dumb, are you sure you want to be with her?

100 Name: strong guy : 2006-12-08 14:06 ID:5/Ducw8L

jerks are more better in expressing themselves

101 Name: James : 2006-12-08 14:18 ID:5NwPy+87

well i called her last night, she picked up but did not response very well.she did not answer very well.. i asked how she was and she asked who i was... i told her my name and she said she doesn't know me.. she did not say anything else at all and her friend came on the phone and told me to buy her a pizza and then hung up.. now in the background i could hear her saying "no, dont hang up" to this other friend of hers... i just dont know what to do...

102 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-08 16:25 ID:oVfESJ2I

what rotten luck, guess you're better off seeing her in person.. perhaps she was a bit sleepy and stuff and lost focus. you should get to the bottom of it all or you'll just prolong the agony of uncertainty.

103 Name: James : 2006-12-08 16:32 ID:5NwPy+87

perhaps i should...

104 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-08 16:34 ID:PbJMy0v9

or you can just give up

i mean, it sounds like she doesnt like you. if she did she would have be anxious for your calls. but no, she said she doesnt know you. she probably had some interest in you in the past but it sounded like little interest. she did invite you to events but she invited you knowing you cant make it. it makes her sleep better at night knowing she was kind of enough to invite you. but in reality she didnt want you there. not to mention you phone stalked her (yes stalked. calling her every day is stalking) and that probably creeped her out. at least now she has a name to put on that restraining order.

look your chance ended when she moved away. but rather than being a man and moved on you acted like a child and refused to accept that she was gone. you were living the illusion that you had a chance with her and obviously that is not the fact. my advice is to give up on her, take some time to focus on your needs and then try the dating pool again, except this time you will have dating book as a guide and an infinite amount of girls to chose from.

oh if she ever calls back, but i doubt she will, to apologize, go ahead and talk to her but dont expect anything out of it. she probably has trouble sleeping or needs a good laugh.

105 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-08 16:40 ID:2s3e0Ccs

Yeah man it sucks, but she doesn't like you. Have some self respect and don't let a girl who doesn't give a fuck about you play with your emotions, because that is what's going to happen if you continue to pursue her. Use this as a learning experience and move on to the next girl. Believe me, there are too many bitches in this world for you to not find one that you like and one that likes you back.

106 Name: James : 2006-12-08 17:13 ID:5NwPy+87

right.. understandable.. i really did like her from deep down in my heart but oh well stuff happens.. thanks a lot guys.. you've been a great help

107 Name: James : 2006-12-08 17:38 ID:5NwPy+87

i really didnt stalk her.. i called her like every 3 - 4 days..

108 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-12-09 18:17 ID:wkz9zEyK

>>104
God, that was tough.

Anyway, Sunderland, good luck with the next girl.
4-ch is always here to give some e-advice.

109 Name: James : 2006-12-09 19:12 ID:5NwPy+87

it is going to be hard to forget her.. maybe you can advise me on how to forget thinking about her.. i am starting to havedreams about her now.. after she told me that.. one thing i would say.. when she acts wierd she is around her friends.. when shes alone, she is fine.. which is still rude and ignorant.. and she should not do that infront of her friends.. another thing.. her mom called me yesterday and asked how my nose was from the car accident and invited me over for christmass supper.. i told her that i am not sure if i can come cuz i might have to work.. i m not gonna bother.. i found that very rude how she acted infront of her friends.. i need some help forgetting about her.. and that should be all..

110 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-12-09 19:28 ID:lVZ7K3cH

My suggestion would be to travel some where far off, Somewhere you'll be able to have fun. Bring some friends along so you'll forget about it fast. I'd say you should go to China, Europe, Fiji, Hawaii, or best of all Japan.

111 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-12-09 19:28 ID:lVZ7K3cH

My suggestion would be to travel some where far off, Somewhere you'll be able to have fun. Bring some friends along so you'll forget about it fast. I'd say you should go to China, Europe, Fiji, Hawaii, or best of all Japan.

112 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-09 19:59 ID:wkz9zEyK

It seriously seems that this girl simply doesn't want to meet you.
But then again, you could go to that supper if you have some free time.

Then you can meet her. Perhaps she simply doesn't remember your name, but she does remember your face.

But if she doesn't remember your face, then... Excuse yourself and leave. Then that case is closed forever.

But how to forget her: find a better hobby.

113 Name: James : 2006-12-09 22:05 ID:5NwPy+87

yeh i am not going to bother with her anymore.. if she calls then fine.. i did mention to her if she needs anything give me a call and i'll do whatever is in my reach to help... so yeh.. not going over or anything.. i am just gonna move on..

114 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-10 02:16 ID:81KLZvvv

Yeah, moving on is the only way to go. I'm going to be honest with you, for the next few weeks it's going to SUCK. You're going to think about her all the time and want to go back on your decision, but DON'T, because wait a few more weeks and you won't think about her at all, if ever.

Now is a good time to get your life together. Get some hobbies, make some friends, hang out with them more, try new things, make sure the next time you see a girl you have the hots for, you are truly ready to go and take her. I've been through this before, and it may feel like the end of the world, but believe me man, it's not. Like someone said above, there are so many girls in this world it's ridiculous.

And one more thing, just to throw it out there, don't base your life around a girl. Make sure before you go for another girl, you have a life of your own and you are simply inviting her into it, instead of making her your life.

115 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-10 04:24 ID:PbJMy0v9

>>114 speaks the truth

>i did mention to her if she needs anything give me a call and i'll do whatever is in my reach to help

if she calls dont bother talking to her. if you pick up the phone and she is on the other end, just say you are in a hurry and cant talk and you will call back some other time. but dont call her back. it is best to end it cold turkey and treat her as a bad dream. and of course dont go and visit her, enjoy christmas dinner with your family.

116 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-10 05:00 ID:j0BXuQu5

>>115

Or, you could solve the problem without being an ass in return.

Look, do whatever you want, there are a billion ways to solve the problem. There are any number of ways to 'forget about her', and it's totally up to you how you respond if she calls you. Just don't stress out about it, it'll sort itself out in time and you'll be fine, not to mention a tad wiser because of whatever happens

117 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-10 05:10 ID:i7r6ZXGV

How is not wanting to talk to someone being an ass? He's not obligated to.

118 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-10 05:30 ID:PbJMy0v9

>>117

No...telling her to eat shit and die is being an ass.

119 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-10 09:48 ID:Jy55QeII

A more general reply, more to the title question.

Sometimes girls can't tell the guy is a jerk, he's probably confusing her.
If he's a jackass, he's a complete jackass, and he's not going to let her know that.

And nice guys ought to help a girl out. I remember a few instances where a good guy friend made all the difference.

120 Name: yuka : 2006-12-10 12:11 ID:CICIxAQ8

You tried, James. You tried.

121 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-11 04:27 ID:gA/dOLxf

God what a bunch of fucking weirdos.

Dude....seriously you are the creepy sort we were talking about.

Either a girl will like you or she won't.

122 Name: iori : 2006-12-11 07:06 ID:zLBBkI7k

Meh, most girls have a "bad boy" fetish.

123 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-11 09:41 ID:N77gS4oQ

>>122
and then they wonder why they're suddenly pregnant and single.

124 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-11 09:59 ID:gTgZ8fZH

>>121 is right
cmon, be a graceful loser. girls reject you, don't blame it on them, they just didn't like you, but you did. which sucks, but thats how it is...

125 Name: yuka : 2006-12-11 15:37 ID:1ti5l/Qs

>>123 nice one. ;D

126 Name: James : 2006-12-11 16:01 ID:5NwPy+87

i am not going to kill myself for it.. just a little shook up how she used to react when i was around and how she reacted now.. just a little upset but i think i am strong enough to take it.. if she thinks she is too good for me then oh well, her loss, all i wanted to give her and make her feel like she was out of this world, some other girl, who cares about me as much as i care about her, would be getting all that.. i am fine with that..

127 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-12-11 16:37 ID:wkz9zEyK

>>126
Good luck James.

Do what I did. Join a band.

128 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-12 13:41 ID:YrJkzXS7

Or do what im doing and get a phd, girls cant resist doctors :)

129 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-12 13:41 ID:YrJkzXS7

Or do what im doing and get a phd, girls cant resist doctors :)

130 Name: James : 2006-12-12 14:04 ID:5NwPy+87

i want to do my Aviation course next year so i am kinda looking forward to that..

131 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-12 16:28 ID:PbJMy0v9

>>129

they cant resist MD doctors not phd doctors

132 Name: James : 2006-12-12 16:44 ID:5NwPy+87

the girl i was talking to you guys about.. she actually told me that she would want to get married to a fire fighter..

133 Name: James : 2006-12-12 16:45 ID:5NwPy+87

i didnt want to be a firefighter anyways so it was a good thing it didnt work out for us..

134 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-12 16:47 ID:PbJMy0v9

why are you thinking about marriage at this age, especially with a girl you are not dating or even have a relationship with?

135 Name: James : 2006-12-12 16:52 ID:5NwPy+87

it wasnt me.. it was her.. and that was like long time ago when she told me that..

136 Name: WeirdBlackTea : 2006-12-13 07:33 ID:8A42nIoo

Not all 'hot' girls are like that....Sorry to say, but that girl you dig sounds pretty shallow....or she simply has some certain preferences up in her mind.
I'm quite a physically attarctive girl myself, and I don't discriminate guys on exteriors. Probably it ahs something to do with the way you'r reared as a child.
My advice: Just eb yourself. Never be superficial. If that girl still can't see your genuinity, yeah....Time to move on I guess.

137 Name: yuka : 2006-12-17 07:25 ID:L69gnN1Y

>>133 Firefighter? o_O;; Good thing you're not a firefighter.

138 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-17 07:33 ID:K3SzdVQn

>>136
I have living proof of this. my girlfriend is extremely attractive, even if it is me that says it, and yet she still goes out with me. I am to say the least, not very attractive at all.
Although she at least says that her friends find me attractive (but they could be lying.) So maybe it does depend on the situation you were raised in?

139 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-17 16:23 ID:MhP6Pdw3

>>138
Signed. The man I'm dating certainly isn't the most conventionally attractive (blond haired, blue eyed, and hugely muscular) I've ever laid eyes on (although I'd say he is damn fine-looking!) but is the nicest and most considerate. And, you're right. The thing that draws me most is his eagerness to learn and try new things and, YES, genuinity. If a girl doesn't appreciate that, the relationship isn't going to last otherwise.

140 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-26 01:31 ID:cwgkfW3B

>>139
Seconded. I ditched a good looking jerk for a plain looking but wonderful, nice and sweet guy - though I would have dumped the jerk even had I not had my eyes set on anyone else. Genuinity, an open mind, curiousity, and honesty are vital to me. And easily I find my by now fiance, after all these years, a lot more attractive than anyone physically better looking, thanks to how he is and behaves.

141 Name: James : 2006-12-27 14:13 ID:5NwPy+87

hi everyone,
i was in her town yesterday(Boxing Day shopping) and we met in the mall, i noticed her in a store but never went over, she came over herself and said hi, we started a conversation, she asked me why i didnt go for christmass supper, and i told her that i was working, she said that we were waiting for you, anyways we talked for about 15 mins and then she said i should go to her place for new years eve atleast. i said i'll try but i cant promise, she told me to give her a call.. i just dont know if i am gonna do that.. anyways.. big thing is. right now i live about 1 hour away from her town, i am moving this coming friday and the place i am moving now would be like 5 hours away from her town.. so yeh.. thats about it.. if there is anything i should do.. let me know but i am thinking i should just forget about her and leave..

142 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-28 09:59 ID:duvYKvMc

well it an easy question. girls want good "guys", not good "people" u know what i mean? if u understand the difference btw 2, u will be able to get a good "woman"

143 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-29 05:29 ID:Heaven

>>142
Some do want good "people". And there are also girls that want good girls, but those aren't relevant to this thread, I think.

144 Name: fart man : 2006-12-29 12:20 ID:duvYKvMc

>>143
are they?? i guess they r quite relevant. well like u say, some girls want good people rather than good guys, but the fact is that much more girls want good guys, i believe..

145 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-29 14:52 ID:Heaven

>>143

Please don't feed the troll, he'll leave when he doesn't get any attention here, just like all those losers do.

146 Name: Rob : 2007-10-31 00:32 ID:I4hH3HT7

I've been dating a girl in england for almost three years, she called me this morning and told me she loved me, then tonight she called and dumped my ass. I've made a huge mistake and put everything into the little bitch and I'm practically fucked in the heart right now. I'm in Texas myself and I know that the distance is fucking harsh, but I've been making arrangements to go over there and be with her, her explanation for dumping me was that she "needed" someone now. I think the bitch was just horny and "needed" to be "filled". Any advice on how to get over the cunt, or get her back before she goes and gets "filled" too many times to count would be awesome. Peace.

147 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-31 03:15 ID:RnmLpVBX

>>146

Don't quite know why you dragged an ancient thread up for this. But anyway... I personally would say there's not much you can do while you are over in America and she is over here in the UK. It might not be that she wants to be "filled" (as you so lovingly put it) but she probably wants somebody physically there to hold. Can you blame her? I personally see internet relationships as good for first time romances but once you have physically been with somebody (who obviously lives near to you) then internet romances dont compare. Even if it's not the sex, people feel the need to be physically near other people - whether its through hugging and kissing or just talking to each other in person (hearing different intonations etc rather than just typed words)

In light of your penultimate sentance; if you want to get over her then you should find somebody that actually lives near you and see about dating them. If you want to get her back you need to see her in person or talk to her on the phone regularly, even then it's not very likely to work.

148 Name: Default : 2007-11-01 02:31 ID:S+zpOipv

>>33
Well, I gave myself a good look, and I can say I'm kinda geeky (not WoW geeky, I mean bookworm and heavy computer user geeky)...But, I'm nice, have a CRAPLOAD of confidence (until it comes to sports...) and I can provide. It's more out of introversion, I think, in my case...

>>39
You seem oddly familiar somehow... Your name, your reaction...
TIP: The dumbest question one could ask on an anonymous board is "Do I know you?
>>70
Hmmm... that's food for thought... It makes sense. I DO have a bit of a jerk in me, I kinda... well, he's for handling money and business got it from my mom LOL

>>123
I lol'ed at this.

149 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-11-01 14:18 ID:aYcJygq6

being nice just isnt enough. pets are nice.

150 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-11-01 20:08 ID:Heaven

qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq

151 Name: Assp : 2009-10-05 01:31 ID:5Gpq16aI

Personally i prefer the jerks that are sensitive inside but don't let ppl see that. In other words sure they are jerks, you can have a fun time talking to them, and you know you can trust. Their nice mysterious but to a limit they aren't too nice. Honestly it depends on the person

152 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-05 03:53 ID:HwNFDWYI

In my experience, >>151 speaks the truth. Most girls want someone like Han Solo, not Luke Skywalker.

153 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-05 04:34 ID:iRTH6KTY

What does not kill you makes you stronger.

Grow Stronger. I have no time for asian women, or these lame mall chicks. Only a Valkyrie is meet for me.

154 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-05 04:37 ID:iRTH6KTY

I MEAN LOOK AT YOU!

Most of these girls are communists or hippies anyways.

It's not that women like jerks, it's that most women are bitches.
It's a communist conspiracy to throw it all into general disarray.

Go to Church or a College Republicans meeting. Go run around the block. Take up a hobby. A real hobby. Start looking down on people. Meet them on your own terms.

There are only two colors in the world. Black and White. No grey, never interlacing. If a girl doesn't like you, she is most likely a communist conspirator.

155 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-05 13:36 ID:uSXPWP+9

>>154

Dude, seriously, are you in drugs?

156 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-05 17:37 ID:kXZpR/vS

>>155

No...
I'm painfully sober. But still, most women are bitches. Quit putting it on a pedestal.

157 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-05 21:39 ID:J+Yup5GU

>>156
Delusional hypocrite.
Just because you had your ass dumped a couple of times, doesn't mean half the human population is against you.

Stay off the drugs.

158 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-05 22:40 ID:Heaven

Way to bump a two years old thread for crap.

159 Name: yellow : 2009-10-14 11:27 ID:o+Jq8RAn

Ok.. this thread is so old.
In any case, I have some ideas about this that I would like to share.
Firstly, think of the human being of the present. Now take all his/her clothes, money, tools, car, house, job, commodities, food, etc. Everything. And what do you have? A person that resembles a primitive human. All right, let's move onto the important bit.

What is the difference between the primitive man and the modern man? It is the ability to handle complex information and to coexist in complex environments with other humans and objects, as well as the ability to express ideas in many other ways other than speech and writing. Pretty much, although that was a very bland description of such difference. The modern man however still runs upon the same naturally built-in rules that the DNA and our instinct define. It is not to say that we are animals, but that people, despite being in a modernized, technological world, still have some primitive aspects to their behaviour, and everybody does it. It's just that our surroundings and our society have changed so much.

When it comes to relationships and meeting new people, why the hell do guys tend to stare at a girl's breasts or why do girls seem to like loud jerks? Firstly, it's all from what is visible. Whenever we meet people we find attractive, the very little information we have about them at the start is visual, and from that our mind elaborates ideas, feelings and goals, all done to satisfy the universal rule of evolution and the sharing of genes. To explain, boobs and curves represent fertility for guys, for girls jerks represent security and the possibility of giving strong and healthy children just like the jerk himself. It all runs upon nature and evolution, the strongest shall prevail and the weakest die off from natural selection.

But,HOWEVER, when you really get to know people, when you can see all their colors, that's when the conscientious and analytical mind in all of us kicks in and takes over our primitive nature. We of course do not run entirely by our instincts, we all think. And so the idea that everything works from our animal-like nature is only background activity in our minds, it just happens naturally, we don't really think about it. When we actually make the decision to act upon our instinct is a different story.

Ok, that was pathetic. But you know what? Having this functional/structuralist/square/whateveryouwant point of view of relationships and sex has given me the foulest of years of complete solitude. I've been too serious all my life, and I'm only fucking 20. Fuck.My.Life. What do you guys think? I think it's about time I stopped caring so pedantically and lived life like everyone else (or so i think???).

160 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-14 12:49 ID:Heaven

>>159 I laughed at your entry...

The best attitude is to realize that women are interested in men that show off themselves. And in this game, the nice(transparent) guy is even worse off than the jerk. But the jerk himself is left in the dust by the engaging and outgoing guy.

The tragedy of nice(transparent) guys, is that they try to fight with the jerks for the leftovers.

161 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-15 00:07 ID:/naxH+d6

Because self-labeled 'nice guys' tend to be annoying clingy jerks.

162 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-16 13:23 ID:Ef9KygLS

It is simple, women like to be put down and controlled, they will say it's not true, they will say they are a liberated woman, they will say they are independant, but they want to be controlled, put in their place, and let the man do all the real work.

163 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-16 21:07 ID:vQbntAwC

>>157

I haven't been dumped. I can't help it that women are bitches.

Bitches and assholes go together. Either be an asshole or quit bitching.

And while half the world's population isn't against me....I am personally against all of the world's population.

You see..I won't lie and say that women can't be amusing but at the end of the day they still shit, piss, smell bad on occasion, and hit you up for money. Just like everyone else in the world.

I mean they can't ALL be raven haired, pallid lasses with shockingly black hair and want to stay home and guard your stuff and then go to work when you come home and want to sleep to earn their keep. They can't all be nihilistic loners with thousand yard stares who live life on the edge. In fact most are boring, stupid, lame or fat. I mean like these mall girls.

They seem cute at first...and really...sex becomes boring. It's nothing more than assisted full body masturbation. They have nothing in common to discuss. They all wish to discuss their wearing t-shirts and being into bleachers and their heroin.

I'm wanting to discuss Colt, benzos, and morphine. I mean...
You find me a girl that can have a cogent and coherent discussion with me about Colt, benzos, and morphine...won't hit me up for money...has her own job, and like...should I decide to lay with her won't patronize me my squealing and yelping and saying "oh yeah fuck me just like that". It is patronizing. I like the cold, eye contact missionary sex that says "I understand perfectly." with no talking....and upon climax there is no yelping. Just a clench..a slight grunt. Like the beasts do...like people used to do centuries ago.

I mean...younger people worry about sex. And once you've done all of your fucking....it's boring. It becomes WORK.

I won't lie and say I don't mind busting a nut into a girl's insides from time to time...but I'd sooner have a nice young lady who is nihilistic and slightly deranged who wishes to discuss Colt, benzos, and Morphine.

164 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-17 00:25 ID:Heaven

>It's nothing more than assisted full body masturbation

I'm starting to think you lack some hormones, buddy.

And you probably won't find what you're searching for because it wouldn't want the bitter psychopath you are. And this comes from a somewhat bitter and not totally stable dude. Damn, I wanted to ignore the thread so it could sink down again. Oh well, I'll sage and hope you'll sage your barking as well if you decide to answer.

165 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-17 00:48 ID:0sWuWiN2

>>164

I am not your buddy, pal.

I'm just saying that most if not all women these days are sad failures of disappointments.

Paula Cole once lamented "where have all the cowboys gone?"

I lament "Where have all the Valkyries gone?" I want a lithe and bitter woman with sharp features and long black wild hair, blue-violet eyes and pale skin who is harsh and cruel. I'm talking Jenny Schecter with balls man. In another time she would have stood high atop a mountain wrapped in wolf's furs and carring a broadsword. Perhaps in more contemporary times she would have been wearing jackboots and carrying a Browning Hi Power when others were toting overrated Walther PPs and PPKs helping make the undermen into lampshades.

A knight errant. I'm not delusional to think that some chick is going to come rolling up in an uparmored Crown Victoria or Hemicuda wearing ripped tight blue jeans and wearing a Slayer shirt and saying "You look like a man who enjoys Colts, benzos, and Morphine. Let's have a heartfelt discussion on aforementioned subject matter. Then we will have efficient, commiserate German sex." When the time comes for her to bear children she will not go to pre-natal care, whine to her parents, or go to the hospital.

She will go off to the woods and do her woman's work. Then come back with a howling young buck of a male baby whose lungs sear with the brisk winter air as he laments his birth into a harsh world where one must become stronger or break.

You people are stuck on lite, non-threatening pop rock

I'm down here wanting to listen satanic, fascist heavy metal. You all are full of shit wanting to be pussy whipped by some stupid bitch. They are all stupid and vapid. Once you've fucked one they just become cum receptacles that talk and beg for money and blow up your cell phone with inane texts like 'lol omg wut r u duing lol???????"

NAY! I want an Aryan goddess of the Master Race who will clean house, work a job and put my needs before her own because she sees me as an investment. She is my tool. I am hers.

And when my foes come for me....and should they succeed. She will cut her womanly long black hair into a short bob and avenge me with a bayonetted AK-103 and a flamethrower. And as she stands triumphant amongst the dead. She lets out a primal roar of quenched vengeance. She may even cut into her chest with a benchmade Nimravus in triumph like the Native American dude from Predator 1.

See....THAT is a woman. What you have is a sad imitation.

166 Name: 157 : 2009-10-17 01:48 ID:Heaven

> Bitches and assholes go together. Either be an asshole or quit bitching.

Alright, so you come off as being an asshole, but at the same time you're bitching about how you can't get a girl that fits your ridiculous fantasies. So either you're well suited to mall bitches, or you should take your own advice and stop ranting about your single life.

> I want an Aryan goddess of the Master Race who will clean house
> See....THAT is a woman.

Seriously, I can't see how what you're doing now is any different from the rest single guys in this thread. Yet, you label them as weak, just because you think that your ignorantly concocted fantasies are more "superior".

I don't see how talking about drugs is any less boring than talking about clothes. Once you're forced to learn about their biochemistry in a pharmaceutical lecture, that shit gets old.

167 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-17 17:33 ID:Heaven

>>166
No, actually he's probably right that drugs are more interesing that clothes (even if benzos and morphine probably aren't the most fascinating).

Still, >>165, you sound like a very delusional guy.

>You people are stuck on lite, non-threatening pop rock. I'm down here wanting to listen satanic, fascist heavy metal.

Er, no. There is more to music than these two boring genres.

>You all are full of shit wanting to be pussy whipped by some stupid bitch.

Eh, no. I'm busy having fun with chill girls (yes, they exist). You're the one whining about how you can't have your own imaginary pet valkyrie.

Also,

>I am not your buddy, pal.

I'm not your pal, friend.

That said I like your style.

168 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-17 17:33 ID:Heaven

>>165

That was beautiful, man...

169 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-21 17:50 ID:rSFD4WK7

This made my day...I want a woman to kick ass, take names and cook me dinner. That is what a woman should be, not a self-absorbed, materialistic hose bag.

170 Name: LT : 2009-11-03 07:18 ID:+pwKQOkI

the basic issue is that niceness does not equal attractiveness. the two are separate and distint. people respond sexually to what they find attractive, not who will logically treat them the best and/or theoretically be a good long term relationship partner. this works female-to-male and vice versa (like secret admirer said, guys are guilty of the same).

the question you are probably asking is why niceness does not make a man more attractive. its evolutionary. women are programmed to be attracted to the "strong" man who demonstrates masculinity and dominance over other men. niceness is often interpreted (rightly or wrongly) as meekness/weakness which is not attractive to women.

the said strength/dominance can be a number of traits - height, athleticism, wealth, fame, social status, good looks, intelligence, artistic ability, and basically success/competence in any endeavour - particularly ones that our culture holds in high esteem (such as musicans, actors, or professional athletes).

it can also be conveyed through general personality traits; all else held constant, confidence boardering on arrogance, along with a consideration of self above others, generally communicates subliminaly high status and dominence to woman more than consideraton of others/humility does (rightly or wrongly). the behaviour is also self-fulfilling - a high status guy who scores a lot of chicks will probably naturally become more confident and arrogant over time & hence this creates something of a self-fulfilling prophesy.

hate to say it, but i think that's the cold hard truth. women are just like guys in being slaves to their base instincts (i have female friends who sometimes say they wish they were attracted to a particular "nice" guy but they just arent't).

cheers,
LT

171 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-11-03 12:46 ID:/J6Y/2GO

why do losers call winners jerks?

172 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-11-03 12:58 ID:Heaven

>>171
2/10

173 Name: W-roar man : 2009-11-11 05:41 ID:u0yCA/oI

>>171
plz ignore this if you weren't serious.
I find it to be a few reasons that in turn branch out:
1)jealousy, be it for women, the hightening of social status, or they're just debbie-downers >8[
2) they winner is just a total ass-wipe jerk, which is quite possible nowadays
you can probably find a whole bunch of other reasons, but I think these are the main two.

174 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-11-12 00:53 ID:Heaven

Women don't dump nice guys for jerks. They never bother with nice guys in the first place and go straight for the jerk.

175 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-11-14 15:46 ID:Cy2Nw7nT

You want to know why "women only like jerks?" It's because some of these "nice guys" are just jerks in disguise.

Most women hate it when you hang around and act all nice just for the purpose of getting pussy, which is what most self-professed "nice guys" do. Sorry, we don't owe you anything. We don't owe you our bodies, we don't owe you our lives, just because you're "nice" to us. Some guys do think that, and some guys have called me personally a "bitch" because I wouldn't put out, and it's sickening and really annoying.

If you're actually a nice person, not a Nice Guy, you probably just haven't met the right woman yet. Everyone has their preferences, and tbh maybe some women really aren't attracted to nice people. Don't tar all women with the same brush, though. :3

176 Name: Crysto : 2009-11-14 18:01 ID:cye1opQp

was in a relationship for 8 years spent most of that time being a dad to my ex girlfriends daughter from her previous marriage. Being a goddamn home maker. Fuck i tried i really did i never strayed once. What the hell did i do wrong all of a sudden she just tells me that her feelings arnte the same anynore that its over that i should leave. That was 2 years ago and im still fucking confused. But what is really getting to me i mean really grinding me is that i was and still am a nice guy. Yet my bud is a real jack ass to his girl friend treats her like shit puts his football dogs porn and social life above her and the kids is loud and abusive when he goes on one smashes things shit like that. Storms off gets me in shit by hiding round my place so i end up looking like im in on it. His GF is so sweet and kind she is so devoted to him i simply cant get my fucking head round it. I mean the other week i siad to him that he should stop complaining id trade places with him any day. The jerk siad that'd be fine by me yet on the night he siad if they split and she got a nu boyfriend he's beat them silly????????????? Worse still now i think that i am becoming attreacted to her yet she wouldnt even look my way not when she has her jackass blue eyed action man. I depressing myself

So LOYD heres how it is nice guys like us finish last cuz we are at the bottom of the pecking order where only there to comfort them when they fuck up and need a shoulder to cry on to support em anything else we just dont cut it. Sad fucking fact of life but its true. You either have to have something they need (ie money) or be some yob with little intelegence and a huge attitude problem to attract a girl and its not just hot chicks that do this believe me iv been through this shit.

177 Name: crysto : 2009-11-14 18:06 ID:cye1opQp

Oh and secret ad please fuck yourself not all nice guys are just in it for the pussy though that is a perk

178 Name: Crysto : 2009-11-14 18:17 ID:cye1opQp

Hmm interesting LT : 2009-11-03 07:18 ID:+pwKQOkI so in order to attract the women i am coeting i have to kick her boyfriends ass into the ground...Sounds good to me where is that fucker?

179 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-11-15 01:30 ID:DvLYbVxt

So you assholes still haven't found a girlfriend yet?

180 Name: gimmeclunge : 2011-05-25 20:13 ID:HnqTYZB7

funny how everybody shut their traps and the last comment is the dude whose case everybody is trying to get at .gave it to all of you guys! HAHA it is extremely funny to see how good advice is often ignored!! why dont you guys all do your "niceness" for the ladies and see what results you get.i for one ignored it and got it right in my balls, and thats when it all made mad sense, hey i am the one with the balls,,, why am i not acting like one... once u are trodden all over and feel like a used up tool everything should make sense.. Go ahead try your bitch "NICE" ways.. you wont get too far...

181 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-05-27 02:55 ID:Heaven

why the fuck would you necro this.

182 Name: drague : 2011-05-29 04:37 ID:hdBRDHW9

hey nice guys...just give up, and go to easy girls, escorts, etc., we usually have enough money and things. it's the balance of life; good girls=+=jerks, nice guys=+=sluts

183 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-06-13 14:28 ID:Heaven

Hey I have a good idea, stop bumping this ancient thread.

184 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-07-25 06:57 ID:yRThuVn/

no lol

185 Name: JERRY : 2011-08-03 01:42 ID:rmRNkxWT

Superficial MOTHERFUCKER!That's nothing to be proud of. How would you like that on your tombstone when you die. "HIS ONLY PURPOSE IN LIFE WAS TO BE AN ASSHOLE.GOD WILL HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT THAT TOO(IN CASE YOU DIDN'T KNOW)

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