Aaah! No! (72)

1 Name: Shayera Hol : 2006-12-03 03:16 ID:LyT9hkNh

/love/ my life is a parallel of the worst romantic movie ever and now I don't know how to stop the film!
It feels like each relationship I've gone through is already pre-destined to go through a set of plot devices that go something like this:
#1.
We start out as friends, enjoying music, comic books and making fun of faggots in the hall together.
#2.
We begin to hang out on the weekends, watching movies, smoking pot and talking about our past.
#3.
We begin to flirt back and forth, the whispers and brushing back and forth, an occasional kiss.
THEN NOTHING.

IT ALL JUST DIES.

I don't understand how, after Plot Device #3, we just revert back to Plot Device #1 and never go to #3 again.
Is it me? Am I not being obvious enough about what I want? Do I send the wrong signals?
Am I......not Girlfriend Material?
Oh /love/, this really blows!

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-03 07:26 ID:5sxk1QHT

After #3 do you discuss having a relationship??

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-03 11:26 ID:qqTf3mrW

Watch some Good romantic movies and see how it's done?

4 Name: Shayera Hol : 2006-12-03 17:06 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>2
Well, I'll mention a few things in passing, but it never seems to sink in. And this is every guy I've dated over the past two years.

>>3
They have those?

5 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-12-03 18:22 ID:4P2JSWdo

Perhaps.. the guys you are dating are too shy.
Or just aren't intrested in you.

But hell, girl, you are doing better than me. I get no play at all :(

6 Name: Shayera Hol : 2006-12-04 01:20 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>5
Damnit. Is there any way to coax shy boys out of their shells?
I mean...I'm doing all I know.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-04 02:23 ID:e2kBkLsI

>>6

As a shy boy I have to say: force them out of it. Drag them along with you.

If it seems like they're okay with it, they love it. If it doesn't seem like they're not okay with it, they don't like it.

If they're shy, confront them with the questions you have.

At worse, you'll just find out that they don't have an interest in you (unlikely, or why would they have hung out with you that long?) or that they just aren't ready and/or are too immature for commitment. (most likely)

Personally, I've never hung out with a girl I didn't like. ...but I've never dated either. :(

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-04 04:35 ID:LvWd+On0

Be determined, if you sense things are dieing, dont let it.

9 Name: Shayera Hol : 2006-12-04 23:18 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>7
Graaarrg, why are boys so much work?
>>8
I don't want to come off as that crazy chick who won't let it go. I would rather things just flow.
Is that too picky?

Also, as a continuation of my original query, is it possible that (even though I told Boy A that we should just be friends) we could still try it again, or should I just forget it and look for a more confident boy?

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-04 23:44 ID:kXJiJBLO

>>9
Some boys are just way too intimidated by this "dating game". You have to FORCEFULLY drag them out of their shell, and if they REALLY don't have any interest, they'll sometime just flat out tell you that

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-05 06:15 ID:e2kBkLsI

>>9

>Graaarrg, why are boys so much work?

lol. Most of the times it's the girls, though. :p

12 Name: Hanyuu : 2006-12-05 08:45 ID:0c+q8vZw

Well, I'll give you advice, but this is assuming one thing and one thing only: he's not afraid of contact.

My advice here is continue on like usual, but... when you get a moment alone and that impulse to love him grows strong, I'd give him a hug and ask him, "Could we stay like this... just for a moment?". The reason you should do this is to determine a few things:
1) Is he afraid of you? I know you've dated, but... he's not sticking with you anymore. Maybe something's bothering him? If he refuses to stay put, hold him a little tighter, but if he honestly resists, let him go, and walk away. Don't talk to him. Just. Walk. Away. I think he might need some downtime, especially if he refuses you. It might hurt him, keep this in mind, but he needs to think about this. If he's not commiting, you shouldn't be tearing your heart over thinking about him; it will only hurt more.

2) If he accepts, then you know you still have a chance. Ask him something that's been on your mind lately. One such example is, "why did it all change?". If he doesn't know what you're talking about, I'm not certain he has given enough thought to this relationship as you have... However, if he does ask what do you mean, simply reply, "what do you think it means?". The idea here is to instigate from him a response. You got to know him better.

3)???

4)Profit!

Sorry, 3 & 4 was just for kicks. Anyway, I hope you read this and take it to heart. Ask me any questions if you have them. I'll be glad to respond.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-10 10:03 ID:SEKsrF2C

Maybe just don't kiss him. Be pissed off about it.

14 Name: Shayera Hol : 2006-12-10 21:59 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>12
I don't know. I guess it's just that I'm so scared of rejection, talking with him just seems like a nightmare. I suppose this is where I'm supposed to suck it up and get to it, right?
>>13
That's sort of the rut I'm stuck in now...

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-11 00:18 ID:/yV7XZR3

>>14
Remember, he is as scared of rejection as you are. I mean, I know I am. :(

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-11 04:02 ID:s8mbCjSl

bottom line is, if you don't do anything, chances are he wont either :/

17 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-12-11 14:21 ID:0B3nerQQ

Perhaps he is too nerveous.
You do have to do something to get him out of his shell.
Get him tipsy. (ho ho ho)

18 Name: Mr.Feather : 2006-12-22 04:54 ID:uacG812J

being a shy guy ill agree with the people here in make the first move. I've been in the same situations and because both of us are shy nothing happened. Even just playfully suggesting something, or joking about the subject may help. Just get the subject out into the air and you'll be suprised.

19 Name: Wanderer : 2006-12-24 20:50 ID:fUU7nw/F

yeah, if you need advice for how to deal with shy guys, this is probably where you will find a good amount of us.

If the guys are at all like me, they might be afraid that they are starting to like you, and you don't like them. I have a female friend who commonly gives me hugs and other sorts of physical attention, but I really don't think she is at all interested in me. I think she is just affectonate. I may be wrong though.

and this may be the problem with your guys. Have you ever actually told them "I love you" or "I really like you"?

20 Name: Shayera Hol : 2006-12-26 02:45 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>19

>>Have you ever actually told them "I love you" or "I really like you"?

Oh my god, no. I get embarrassed talking about things like that with boys I like. I guess I just expect them to know by my continual interest and well..I don't know.

21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-04 05:20 ID:9mlbPRm2

Why are you going after shy guys? Are they your thing? Go after someone who challenges you and keeps you on your toes. Also, if you see that the same thing is happening over and over again JUST TAKE A BREAK from it all. Evaluate what you like in a guy and when you meet a guy that scores high on your score sheet give him a shot. Just because a guy likes the same things as you do and does the same things as you doesnt mean he is all into you. Heck, guys go to church with their girlfriends and on the inside they truly hate God--but they do it to win the girl right? You arent supposed to do the work of getting a guy interested in you. They are. They love challenges and when you just drop into their arms you are an easy catch and they just move on.

22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-04 05:50 ID:nJutIEFn

>>21 Love/relationships shouldn't be dependent on trivial games. It should develop out of feelings, not artificial interests. I wouldn't want someone who only liked me because they want to win me over. Doesn't seem like it would last.

23 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-04 06:03 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>22

>>It should develop out of feelings, not artificial interests.

This is exactly what I have been looking for and it just doesn't seem tangible anymore! I mean, maybe you're supposed to just settle with the Hey-I-sort-of-like-you's instead of the fiery Jesse Custer and Tulip kind of love everybody wants? I'm very confused.

>>21
I guess I'm just too fussy when it comes to dating. It feels like it should be all or nothing?

>>You arent supposed to do the work of getting a guy interested in you.

Then I should just sit back and wait for him to sweep me off my feet?

24 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-04 11:31 ID:8E4LdFTy

If this dude you really like is this really shy dude, then I guess you have to do something to strongly show that you are intrested in him.
He is scared shitless because he doesn't want to screw up [Which may lead into an utter date disaster which leads to break up/rejection (from a pretty girl) and a not so funny story to tell].
Once they understand that you want him, then they should be working harder to get you.

Sure, I am not the best guy to tell anybody to do anything, but don't settle with that "I sorta like you" thing. Love is supposed to be passionate and mutual, right?

I don't know, but maybe if you gave some information who are you aiming for, maybe we could give some better advice.

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-04 12:57 ID:zHi32uSs

So as of now, when was the last time you went out with this guy? I support the advice that you should give him more physical contact to let him know, contacts that are unmistakeable about your intentions (like hugs as mentioned b4)

>>21 What do you mean by a guy keeping a girl on her toes? I always wanted to know what that meant.

26 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-04 21:30 ID:6y3WI2Et

>>25 I think he means keeping a girl on her knees.

27 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-04 22:46 ID:Heaven

> contacts that are unmistakeable about your intentions (like hugs as mentioned b4)

umm, disregard that. hugs are the most ambiguous signals ever. plenty of girls hug their just-friends friends. if he's as shy as you think he is and you just hug him, he's just going to think you're one of those.

> Oh my god, no. I get embarrassed talking about things like that with boys I like. I guess I just expect them to know by my continual interest and well..I don't know.

so wait -- he's too shy to make a move, but you won't either? honey, if he's shy, he's not going to make a move unless by some miracle you can stop him being shy. and if you do manage to do that, he's going to stick you in his friends basket forever because he values you so much and doesn't want to lose you and rah rah. if you want a shy guy, it's your move, and it better be obvious.

basically you need to club him over the head and drag him back to your cave.

28 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-05 03:32 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>24

>>Once they understand that you want him, then they should be working harder to get you.

But at that point, they shouldn't have to work, right? It will have just fallen into place, hopefully!

>>Love is supposed to be passionate and mutual, right?

That's what the storybook says.

>>I don't know, but maybe if you gave some information who are you aiming for, maybe we could give some better advice.

Like what I'm looking for in a guy? Oh god, it could be anybody...I'm picky, but also incredibly flighty. I guess the most important thing I want from a boy is understanding. A connection beyond, "hey your hair is pretty." I imagine it would feel like a aching in your chest, or just waking up from a deep sleep and knowing everything is great everytime we see each other. >>my life is a parallel of the worst romantic movie ever
See? It's happening again!
>>25
We hung out on the second weekend of december, as friends (seeing as how we'd sort of "broken up" what little we had) and I think we had a pretty good time. I wanted to kiss him (ALOT) but held back and instead made lots of jokes and we spent the whole night laughing and roaming from party to party. I just wish I knew what he was thinking! Seeing him around school, it's very awkward...
>>27

>>he's going to stick you in his friends basket FOREVER

Ah, my heart got a little chill reading this! I don't want to be in the friends basket!! I'm just very scared of making myself more of an idiot than I already have. I've only planned out confronting him in daydreams, but they always involve stripping naked and running off to the bedroom for furious sex after a heartfelt apology. So that's out of the question as I don't want to make a bad decision and ruin our relationship!

(longpost is looooong)

29 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-05 11:15 ID:zHi32uSs

>>26 "... on her toes." is the right expression. I still don't know what it means. And it's supposedly to do with times when women says to a guy "I just can't figure you out". What the hell that means?

30 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-05 11:16 ID:l/wC80BI

>>I guess the most important thing I want from a boy is understanding.

Speaking from a guy's perspective, that's fine, but if you expand it to the whole "you should know what I want all the time" thing it's really a turn-off at the least. don't expect that.

31 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-05 11:19 ID:zHi32uSs

Oh, and Shayera, if you feel like you want to kiss him that much, then make like Nike and JUST DO IT!! If hugs are ambiguous, then a long kiss (at least to me) is unmistakeable of intention.

32 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-05 11:21 ID:zHi32uSs

>>30 Yes, I very much agree with you. My ex said that to me, as if I can mind read. Perhaps Shayera means understanding in appropriate times.

33 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-05 12:04 ID:l/wC80BI

>>31

Yeah, women can do that, guys can't. Exercise your right to do so. ;)

34 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-05 16:52 ID:8E4LdFTy

>>28

Okay, Hol, let me get some things straight.

This dude is really shy, right? Does he act tense (as sober) around you? If yes, then it's a sign! If not, then he might be hiding his feelings.

Anyway, I'd say that you have to grab the reigns [I can't tell a girl to grow a pair] and just do it. Ask/Kiss/Torture/whatever. Get to know what he feels about you. A simple DON'T YOU LIKE ME?! should do the trick. (Man I know it does sound crappy)
Seriously, I am getting rather impatient and I want this wild goose chase to end.

Good luck, Hol!
-A soon to be 15 year old teenager.

35 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-05 17:11 ID:Heaven

> >>I guess the most important thing I want from a boy is understanding.
> Speaking from a guy's perspective, that's fine, but if you expand it to the whole "you should know what I want all the time" thing it's really a turn-off at the least. don't expect that.

Understandment is not the same as being a mind-reader. Never is, never has been and they're not even related. Never forget that, and do inform people who act like that about it (though preferably in a pleasant manner, lest you want them to not listen to you "because you're a poopyhead" <-- the kind of expression i'd espect from such people)

36 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-05 22:53 ID:l/wC80BI

>>35

Just making sure nobody falls into that trap.

37 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-06 01:29 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>34
Well, he's not really shy in the full sense of the word. He's very popular and I'm definitely NOT his first. I hear other girls talk about him all the time, how cute how funny he (Clark) is etc. I think it's just around me he gets shy. I am also friends with his best friend (Jon) and Jon told me how Clark used to get so nervous taking me out on dates. Clark does act really tense now and it bothers me so much! Does that mean he might still have feelings for me? (I hope!)
>>35
Thank you for clearing that up for me.

As an update of our current relationship and/or the little games we play, the only time we see each other during school is when we sit together at lunch.
I sit right next to him and it sort of feels like he pays closer attention to me than the other students that sit with us. He leans in close when I speak, and I catch him turning to look at me a lot, even when I'm not speaking. But at the same time, it feels like he's ignoring me slightly. I try and engage him in conversation but it seems like everything I say falls flat...
I see him in the halls, he doesn't speak to me.
We have band class together, he doesn't speak to me.
Though I guess I can't blame him, we stopped "dating" around the beginning of December. Does this mean anything?

38 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-06 09:46 ID:8E4LdFTy

I have no idea what you have to do now.
I mean, there is no walkthrough/hint file here.

Ofcourse he pays more attention to you if you sit right underneath him. What would you do if some Tom Cruisy(Or Brad Pitty, whichever you prefer) dude would sit right next to you? You would pay more attention to him, that's what.

Seriously, this thing that he doesn't get so tense anymore is kinda iffy. I mean, if he stopped feeling that fear (of fucking things up), then that literally means you have become friends with him.. And.. Yeah :/ Seriously, this ending simply sounds too bad.

I guess you simply have to confront/torture/ask him. Or give up.
Because seriously, if you stir a soup long enough, it WILL get cold.

Good luck.

39 Name: yuka : 2007-01-06 13:56 ID:78oD8UM8

>>1 I just hate it when stuff like that happens! (I was too lazy to read the whole thread but I'm just going to reply anyway.)

You are girlfriend material but the guy just doesn't notice it. If he likes you and you like him, then he should've done the first move. But if he's just testing how you two would be like as boyfriend and girlfriend, well.. I'd kick the guys ass.

But if he likes you and is doing moves on you, why don't you try telling him how you feel? (Feels like this is a romance manga or some sort. XDD)

.__.'' Sorry if I'm not much help.

40 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-09 02:40 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>38
Thank you for the advice. I can't believe you're only 14! Tomorrow we have lunch together, afterwards I'll walk with him to class and try and sort this mess out.
It's just so awful! I've been having these weird dreams and it feels like I see him more and more around campus, ugh! Relationships are so tough!

>>Because seriously, if you stir a soup long enough, it WILL get cold.

This scares me.

>>39
It's OK, at least I know someone can sympathize with my situation!

Wish me luck, /love/!!

41 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-11 18:07 ID:P+q3BBAO

>>40

Well, sorry about scaring you :P
But hell, who ever said love will be easy. I wish love would be just like in fairy tales: you pull off this incredible stunt of tricking the evil wizard, slaying the mighty dragon, sprinting up to the highest tower and then grabbing the girl and then outrunning a pack of rabid rabbits hungry for flesh. Then you enjoy your reward of having a fine maiden.

Anyway, tell me the updates! (I hope I didn't make you do something stupid D: )

(Also, the soup thing. What I meant by it was like, if you think that there is a chance, you HAVE to take it. If you start hesitating and then plan taking act BY THE START OF THE NEW MONTH/YEAR/DECADE, then by then it might be too late ;_;)

42 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-13 06:37 ID:LyT9hkNh

Well, this just goes to prove how clueless and stupid I am, even before 4-ch's help...
I called him and asked him to come hang out with me tonight and her told me,"Yeah, sorry but I'm going to hang with Jake and this hot chick- I can't do stupid shit on a Friday." After I got home and cried my eyes out for being such a fool, I decided to
clue you in on the end of my story. I'm sorry, I am very stupid!

> >>I wish love would be just like in fairy tales

<3

43 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-13 08:11 ID:P+q3BBAO

>>42

So that's it? D:

44 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-13 17:11 ID:Heaven

..Pretty much. Now I'll just resign myself to a life of spinsterhood in the dark of my room.

45 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-13 17:26 ID:Heaven

Sucks for you, stupid girl.

46 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-13 18:20 ID:LyT9hkNh

Please don't say things like that.

47 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-13 18:45 ID:NzAuuWHv

Don't give up, Densha Shojo! Just get another guy. As much as it looks like life'll end right now, there are tons of other nice guys out there.

48 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-13 19:46 ID:Heaven

Well, if you want to grab the last straw, you could ask him on a date when he isn't with Jake and the girl who may or may not be Jake's girlfriend.

49 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-13 20:27 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>47
Yes but no one ever told me boys would be this hard. I don't want to sound like I expected everything to fall into my lap, but it shouldn't have caught on fire and burned into a awful disgusting mess of feelings right?
>>48
He made it pretty clear that he didn't want to be near me.
So I don't want to do anything ever again, actually. I'd rather just sit here and pout. ;_;

50 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-13 21:48 ID:Heaven

>>49
"if you don’t even try because you’re afraid that you might fail, than you will most assuredly never learn anything!" <-- learn from that quote.
Wallowing in self-pity and trying to pretend that you inherently are shitty is just... Guh... Fucking stop doing it. Stop intentionally reducing yourself to a five-year old. You're only as bad as what you make yourself. Why the fuck do you hurt yourself? Do you hate yourself that much?

51 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-13 23:02 ID:LyT9hkNh

It's not a matter of self-hate, it's just I've got to think this is my fault somehow! Me saying I'm just going to rot in solitude is certainly an exaggeration and I don't really mean half the things I say anyway (what girl does) but it's just rough and I don't really know where to go from here. I thought things were good but it all fell apart and I realized I am inherently shitty.
I should have taken the hints and let it die.
I should not have read so much into things.
And I guess I should stop with the self-pity too, huh?

52 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-14 10:37 ID:Fhhr0XGU

Fine, wallow in self pity and whatever.

But seriously, did he say that doesn't want to be with you?
Plus, he went probably with them because they were first to ask.

But fine, if you believe it's over, then it is over. Wallow in pity, cry, etc. etc. etc. etc.

53 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-14 10:48 ID:LyT9hkNh

I don't know, I don't know. I didn't sit him down and talk feelings, I just sort of let it go with an, "Oh yeah?"
He told me he didn't want to hang and that what I was doing was stupid, that he'd rather go with Jake and the pretty girl instead of me. A good solid brushoff if I've ever gotten one.
I didn't want this to be forced and now it turned into something I never wanted.
Please don't assume I'm overly emotional about this (in a way I guess I am) but I'm not as dramatic as I make myself out to be.
( ´д`) what a drag

54 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-14 10:52 ID:Heaven

>>51
You're not inherently shitty. However, you keep desperately clinging onto that idea. Lie down on ze couch. Tell me about your parents, did zey make you feel as if you were not good enough?

Why are you afraid of the idea that you are not interently flawed? Would it make you feel bad for how much you've hurt yourself and your situation in the past?

55 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-14 13:05 ID:Heaven

>>53

Ouch D:

56 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-15 04:55 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>54
Ah, damnit! I didn't realize I was setting myself up for psychoanalysis! I've got to have some kind of problem, if only to blame all my fuckups on! I thought everyone was inherently flawed? I didn't think love would be and I guess I sort of hero-worship/idolize my boyfriends (Save me, Clark!) but it's true that most of the hurt on my part could have been avoided with some common sense.

>>Would it make you feel bad for how much you've hurt yourself and your situation in the past?

What? I already feel stupid enough about it! Am I supposed to feel even worse?

57 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 05:27 ID:luZrTvHd

OMG he is going to hang out with his friend and another girl, what a bastard?! I mean, he couldn't change his plans, plans that he was already committed to, so he could hang out with you. After all, he just promised two of his friends he will spend time with them and one of them happens to be hot. You know, I bet they are going to have an orgy and he will end up impregnanting her.

Seriously stop acting by your emotions and start thinking logically. He was right to call what you were doing as being stupid. You were demanding him to give up his life so he can be in yours as how you see fit. It is not the fact that you are girlfriend material, it is the fact that you are too demanding of your boyfriends and can never be satified by them. You expect them to be supermen but the best they can ever be are Clark Kents.

58 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 06:06 ID:Heaven

>>54
Well, I was partially jesting with the couch bit. Though IMO you really do need to think through your priorities, values and perceptions.
Everybody is inherently flawed, but not in a way that makes them less worth - which is exactly how too many people think, except for that they tend to declare themselves The One who is so inherently flawed that almost everybody else is lightyears ahead of them. You seem to do something similar with your romantical interests. Don't put them on a pedistal, they're humans, just like everyone else. Treat them that way, don't reduce them into objects of quasi-perfection (in comparison to yourself).

>What? I already feel stupid enough about it! Am I supposed to feel even worse?

No. You're not supposed to feel bad the way you do, in fact. Seems as if you're the type who feels that they deserve and need to be seriously punished (and in the process emotionally wounded, albeit partially unintentionally) if you fail to be "ZOMG AWESOME!!111oneeleven". Punishing yourself like that only will set you even further back, it really doesn't make sense if you think about it in the long run. People tend to resort to that kind of behavior because they fail to realize that, that those negative subconscious and extremely short-term gratifications really have no place in a stable life.

By the way, I have met people who are genuinely happy and experience so called "true love". Their lives are not at all flawless, and every single relationship has its ups and downs, but overall they're doing really well. You're setting yourself up for negative relationships (whether they're one-sided or not). You're too busy enabling love-situations that are seriously negative, to find the ones that aren't.

I'm no licensed shrink, I'm not even a hobby shrink. I do not claim that my statements are automatically true, though I do believe that considering our comments as well as your own may help you to get insights about yourself, whether or not it was because we said something that happened to be true or the opposite; that you need to take a different approach. You do need to reconsider some things in your life (though pretty much most people do, if not all). We're here to help, but our help is useless if you don't actually use it. (please note that it doesn't mean that we are supposed to dictate your actions, just that our suggestions are to be considered and evaluated. you're the one who knows your life most accurately.)

59 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-15 06:56 ID:Heaven

>>57

>>He was right to call what you were doing as being stupid. You were demanding him to give up his life so he can be in yours as how you see fit.

Woah woah woah. A misunderstanding has occured. I was never sad about the fact that he already had plans (Far be it from me to DEMAND anything), it was the fact that he told me, "You calling me up was pretty stupid," that made me...unhappy to say the least.

>>58
That's a pretty nice disclaimer you have there. But thank you for the advice. I guess you are right, it really is about time for me to take a seat and think about what it is I even want.

60 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 12:59 ID:zHi32uSs

Shayera, too bad you aint a Perth Aussie hey, otherwise we can just hang out to share being lonely together (from "Piano Man", '..they are drinking the drink they call loneliness but it's better than drink it alone.') But then again, a friend I know she also said "I want a bf" but when I offered, she says "it doesnt mean that I go for the first guy that comes", probably same with you.

61 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 14:26 ID:Heaven

>>That's a pretty nice disclaimer you have there.

Their "disclaimer" is true :-D

>>it really is about time for me to take a seat and think about what it is I even want

Yes! @_@ Anything we can help with?

62 Name: Newoz : 2007-01-17 04:09 ID:abGjQnS+

Right. If you want to expose yourself in society (in any way), do out of the ordinary stuff, choose a career, get a tatoo?, start a blog, make friends, get a boyfriend; you should begin (maybe from the beginning) with some simple questions.

Who am I? What do I want? What do I see in other people, such as boys? What should I do to get what I want? How do I do it? Alternative methods? Etc. etc. etc.

Certainly, you cannot succeed in life if you don't know yourself.

Anyway, I know about 79% of myself, and am getting to know more everytime I go through important stages of my life with myself, friends, family, other people, etc. Note: I have never had a girlfriend, and I'm approaching 18 years old already! (Thinks of going to the singles rant thread) Still, I have gone through many dificulties in my teenage years, and I wouldn't have been able to understand a situation and my position in it if I didn't knew myself.

So, here we go. Get yourself some tea, or coffee, a notebook or paper, a pen or pencil and start to answer some of those questions.
Ganbare!!! If you start in time, you can catch up and repair all those mistakes or accidents you have made recently (if you have, that is).

Have a nice day! (Walks away and says hi to a dog in the way)

63 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-17 05:00 ID:Heaven

>>61
I don't know! Maybe this is me subconsciously reaching out for more approval (oooh high school philosophy!) but did I handle the situation correctly? He hasn't said a word to me since Friday; I feel awful about it, but I guess that goes away in time.
On another (more embarrassing) note, know any good dating websites? ;_;
but first
>>62
I am probably at 0% right now. I think I will now go roll a j and sit on my back porch to think on this further.

64 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-17 05:01 ID:Heaven

>>62
Um.. A tattoo is nothing to get on a whim, it's a lifelong commitment.

65 Name: Newoz : 2007-01-17 05:07 ID:abGjQnS+

javascript:insert('>>63',1165115819)
63

Take your time...

66 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-17 07:45 ID:Heaven

>>65 wtf

67 Name: Newoz : 2007-01-18 20:33 ID:Heaven

Any updates?
._.

68 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-26 00:16 ID:LyT9hkNh

Weeeeelll as of now my love life is sort of on hold (as is every other part of my life). I got DAEP'd and won't be back out on the scene until March 2nd.
On a further note, I think my chances of finding a real boy are slim to none, and maybe I should stick it out with this anonidate thing. At least then we'll have something in common!

69 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-26 02:26 ID:0IUeEavM

>>68
This is a good point! where do you live?

70 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-26 10:02 ID:Q19CeOYY

>>68

Relax, Hol. I'm almost in the same boat as you.

Me and a pretty interesting girlfriend any soon? DREAM ON!

Also, watch out for anonidate. They will freakin' gang up on you! 10:1 ratio to men for girls = ho ho ho.

71 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-26 11:14 ID:gvbcD/zP

72 Name: Shayera Hol : 2007-01-29 22:45 ID:LyT9hkNh

>>69
I'm over in the Texarkana area. Next to absolutely no-one. ;_;
>>70
Yeah, it's ridiculous the amount of "lol r u really a girl" messages I've gotten.
>>71
wtf

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