Hey guys and girls,
Recently (it started about 3 weeks ago) I've fallen in love for the first time in my life and fortunately it's with a girl who is in love with me too (atleast, that's what she tells me, and to be honest I have no reason to doubt her). It's great when I'm with her, however, when I'm not, I feel not so well most of the time. I have an upset stomach and I'm eating a lot less then I used too (I've already lost weight). Also, I'm finding it hard to concentrate on my homework and I have obsessive thoughts, like I'm afraid she doesn't love me, I think she might be cheating on me or that suddenly our conversations are becoming more boring then before and she will become bored with me. I've also stoppped wanking because I simply don't feel the urge anymore (I was expecting the opposite to happen).
Fortunately I'm realistic enough to realize that I'm having these thoughts and symptoms because I'm in love, and I'm not acting on my thoughts in a way that might scare her off. I don't think anyone has noticed how I really feel yet. Normally, I'm a very relaxed and calm person (mind over matter and all that), something I'm proud of, so I'm quite annoyed with how I feel right now. Still, I only see her about once a week and I can't get rid of these feelings and physical problems when I'm not with her.
I'm sure I'm not the first person to be 'love sick' and it's probably quite normal, however, can anyone give me some suggestions on how to deal with?
Do something. The best way to not do something you don't want to do is to do something in which will not allow you do it.
It's important to find yourself trustworthy and its important to find a person who is trustworthy so from the sounds of your post it seems as if you have that one, the next thing you need to do is ensure you have mates and friends around you and that you still continue to lead a normal life.
Just don't forget to include this Lady of yours, if you are unable to divert this thoughts they will consume you later in life.
Yes, that crossed my mind (doing stuff), unfortunately I have to study right now so I can't really do too much but sit around and look into my books. And what do you mean when you say: Just don't forget to include this Lady of yours, if you are unable to divert this thoughts they will consume you later in life. ?
Aw man. I feel EXACTLY the same way as you. I think this girl has the same feelings for me as I have for her. Unfortunately she lives in the US and i'm in the UK. We just spent a week together which was awesome and since she left I have'nt stopped thinking about her. I've been eating a lot less and I find it hard to concentrate my mind on anything else. I'm getting her e-mail but I don't know what to do with myself. This is the first time i've been in PROPER love I think and I don't know how to deal with it. Since I met her every other girl i've met just isn't the same. I also dont feel like masturbating at all (use to do it quite often before). I seriously don't know how to take my mind off her. HELP!
I understand very well...
First, take some time to masturbate to pr0n, NOW, it WILL help by relieving the tension and resizing your mental image of her.
And keep urself occupied, it's impossible to concentrate on mental tasks but you can watch anime, do sports, manual labor etc.
And most important: FUCK HER. This is what you must do, the real meaning behind the 'sickness'.
Besides, keep in mind that if you don't FUCK HER, she will NOT become attached to you, and as a result you risk blowing the relationship by becoming too clingy while she still has her emotional distance, a distance which you can cross only if you FUCK HER.
Cheers for that but erm, i'm 15 and she's 16... Fucking her is kinda out of the question for now.
>8
It's kinda illegal. Gotta wait a year.
fuck her ass. thats not illegal
haha, felt the same way for a girl..
only she didn;t love me but my best friend.. >_>
so he ran off with her.. I'm not over it yet and it's been over 3 months now. trust me: you are lucky. don't complain too much and do what secret admirer tells you to do. 15 & 16 is ok to have sex.
I understand you don't like the thought. you don't feel such a desire yet. but it will come in time, when you start to know her better ^^
GL OP :)
Not-wanting-to-wank is quite natural when you're badly in love. It's a question of hormones and psychology, but whatever - it will probably not last. It is also quite probable that though you love her, you don't want to fuck her now (not speaking about illegal stuff & the like). It's the "emotional" facet you're through right now, a good lot of people live the first steps of a relationship like that. It's ok, it means that when the moment comes and the desire gets the upper hand, it will be, like, more 'justified' (I know this isn't the word I wanted to use, and that I'm probably going to get flamed 'zomg just fuck her fag' for that, but whatever). Just don't hesitate when this moment comes.
And by the way, I'm not sure (I don't know where you live, so I don't know your particular legislation) but I think it's not illegal to fuck her anyway, since you yourself are not over 21 (and of course not over 16). So no big deal, you aren't using "adult" pressure to get sex from an underaged. Maybe.
... YOU ONLY ARE A YEAR APART, AND IT'S ILLEGAL, WILL THERE BE SOMEONE WATCHING YOU HAVING SEX ? I MEAN, I DON'T THINK ANY OF YOU WOULD GO TO THE POLICE AND SAY 'OH, I HAD ILLEGAL SEX'. i think the policeman would even laugh at you and send you back home.
unless he lives in north korea...