geek makeover, long story, :( please help (58)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-14 08:27 ID:NrlVg1kb

I have been reading the boards and posting as anonymous most of the time.. I really don't have a name to give myself, so I just left myself as Anonymous. I am a geek, pure and simple. I dress like a geek, I act like a geek, and I look like a geek. I am a 24 year old asian male with short black hair, square metal framed glasses. I dress in the "Densha Otoko" style, I'll let you imagine it, and I have a similar problem. I recently met a girl in my school.. It begins with me seeing her everyday and not talking to her, she's really cute.. if I could name someone that she looks similar to, it would be Jennifer Morrison, just yesterday(Friday) I was at a bookstore and saw her with a another guy.. I felt disappointed.. because I knew that she wasn't available.. Anyways, they started arguing and it wasn't the normal couple squabbling, the guy was being a total ass and she looked really really hurt by it.. I don't know what came over me, but I went over there and took her hand and pulled her away -.-;; my mind was racing and I kept thinking "idiot idiot idiot" to myself.

She and the bookstore staff thanked me for stopping the disturbance, else they would've called security. I asked for her number and I didn't get a chance to call her till today because i'm a coward... Now, I have a date and I want to dress properly, I don't want to look the way I do now, I want to look attractive that way I have a chance of her falling for me.

2 Name: NANA : 2007-01-14 09:05 ID:+6ZHDvq4

Read Densha Otoko.

3 Name: fart man : 2007-01-14 09:11 ID:LyZOZ+g7

>>2
he doesnt have to, since he has already read it. his story is almost the same as the TV drama.

1
[I really don't have a name to give myself]
why dont u call urself "Geek"?

by the way, whats ur question? or u just wanted us to hear ur story??

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-14 09:15 ID:NrlVg1kb

>>3

well my question is, "how should I dress?" should I just wear the same thing or should I go for more dressed up look? short hair, hair with long bangs, or just grow out my hair with the long fabio look.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-14 09:21 ID:TtAl3sl0

http://www.tickets365.com.cn/Article/2003/xietingfeng/img/pic2.jpg

Hopefully already have this stuff in your wardrobe..
Don't show chest as much, but don't do up the top button.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-14 09:27 ID:NrlVg1kb

LOL, the guy look tall and buff contrasted to the short and thin me. Other than that, I can manage that! Thanks :O

I'll have to cut my hair a little shorter. Hmm, I definitely could manage that.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-14 09:37 ID:TtAl3sl0

>>6
Yeah. It's a casual look generic look...can't really stuff up with it.
You'll have to develop a better style yourself (seeing as we don't know what you look like). When you have more time you should get a girl to take you out shopping. The most important thing is to wear clothes that compliment your body.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-14 10:27 ID:Ac6F46pu

Shouldn't you finish school by now? >>;;

The problem with makeovers are that they don't last. So if you are looking for changes it should be small otherwise you won't be able to keep it up and then in the end she'll realise what's going on. If you know what i mean....

Smart casual. Dark jeans with casual sport shoes and basically any nice shirt. The safest are like collar button ups hide a stomach if you have one. If you're skinnier you can go for black long sleeve and wide collar.

If you want to wear like a nice suit jacket with jeans wear a simple t-shirt inside. Well imo, that is so hot ;O;

I think you should tell us what you usually wear

9 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-14 10:53 ID:gje+pxhy

You just gotta get some new clothes. Try them on, and feel. Does it fit? Do you think you feel great in those clothes?
Hell, if you can't pick, just ask an employee. I mean, they are there for a reason, you know.

Haircuts.. I myself have bad experiences with those. (They never look the way I want D:) Perhaps an real hair stylist will help you out here.

Gosh, didn't you learn ANYTHING from Densha Otoko? All they were like ASK EXPERTS and look what happened!

BUT HOLD ON, you actually got an date with her?
Smooth move, dude! When is the date?

10 Name: fart man : 2007-01-14 15:30 ID:LyZOZ+g7

>>3
right. u cant go out with the girl wearing otaku-look clothing. shed feel so embarrassed. imagine a girl in an elegant dress and an otaku-look guy r walking holding each others hand! well she might not be wearing such a nice dress, nor might u hold hands this time, but maybe they will happen in the future.

buying new and proper cloth will be a good investment (even thought she didnt like u after the date. u probably find another one that you love, and the new one will get embarrassed. NOT amazed)

when u go to a clothing shop, u should take some girls with u if possible. they will select right one.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 04:52 ID:C1vhh1zc

Actually it was better that you didn't call her as soon as you could, it would show your desperation. Just use the 3-4 day rule between phone calls and keep them short and to the point. Use the dates as the medium for conversation.

>>6 Has the right idea for dressing. She will not be wearing a formal dress unless you are going to a ball. Make sure you shave unless you have a full beard and want to keep it, shower, etc.

And for shopping I am sure there will be girls working at the clothing store so ask them for advice. They will try to sell you expensive stuff, but talk with them and even try to flirt with them. Work on talking with girls so you are not in a daze on your date.

12 Name: Hon Otoko : 2007-01-15 07:10 ID:NrlVg1kb

Alright, I chose a name, I went shopping for clothing and went to several department stores. I asked one of the workers to help me decide on the clothing and it took nearly 2 hours trying out clothing to pick out the ones that I like. Afterwards, I went to style my hair to something different and again, I asked for assistance with one of the female stylist there.. At the end, I ended up with this style of clothing and hair for my date...
http://img.airspider.com/image/00/31/19/00311946_2.jpg

I'll post the pre-date and date on the next post.

13 Name: Hon Otoko : 2007-01-15 07:19 ID:NrlVg1kb

By that time, I was really short on money, after spending so much to prepare for the date. I really didn't have much to go on a "PROPER" date.

The date was arranged to be met at the bookstore, she kept a rose in her hand and offered me when I went to greet her, she was lovely with long hair, blue jeans, a red tanktop, and a white coat ^^;; I felt weird getting a rose from her.. We left the bookstore and we grabbed burgers at Mcdonalds. We didn't stay to eat, we went to the local park, talked, ate, and left before it got totally dark.

Now that i'm home, should I call her now or wait later? should I arrange a second date as soon as possible or wait 3-4 days?

and one final question, where would the second date be x.x

Urg, I'm clueless about this.. Thanks for your input!

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 07:28 ID:MQyat+bt

I think you should probably call her a bit later tonight. You don't have to ask her out for a 2nd date tonight though. Just talk to her and try to get to know her better.

If you're getting some good vibes from her, then you can think about where you'd like to go for a 2nd date. Just curious to know, was this an official or un-official 1st date?

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 07:30 ID:MQyat+bt

That's only a suggestion though. I have no first-had experience myself when it comes to dealing with girls. I belong more on the Single's thread.

16 Name: Hon Otoko : 2007-01-15 07:39 ID:NrlVg1kb

>>14

I really don't trust the vibes that I get, i'm not really good at judging people.

I don't even know if it's official or un-official date, how can you tell?

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 07:44 ID:MQyat+bt

I'm not too sure. I always believe that you should trust your instincts. Your story feels a little bit too much like Densha Otoko, if that's the case, then go ahead and confess to her.

About the only real advice I can give is make your intentions known from the start. Don't come off as just another guy being nice to her.

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 08:14 ID:1D0bz80z

>>12

I'm not a fan of that style but it's a style that you really can't go wrong with.

My suggestion (as a girl) is that you take her somewhere vaguely fun. Not just the generic type of date, if you know what I mean. I was taken to one of the Japanese Gardens and I thought it was going to be boring. But the end we started to go off course and hide out in the bamboo's. We ended up getting locked in till quite late since there was a moat. x__x

It was thrilling. x3 Dates with such fun experiences are really cute. They make up the sweetest memories.

I guess what I'm trying to say is.. you really shouldn't worry too much about the date. I mean finding a restaurant or a place to go. It's more of what you make of the experience.

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 08:24 ID:1D0bz80z

aa also

since when do ppl start 'confessing' to each other when they date? Only the traditional do that. You date the person. It means you like them. If they keep refusing it means they don't like you. I seriously don't think you need to confess to her. It comes off way too strongly and a tad dorky. The only people I know who 'confess' are like the japs.

20 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 08:35 ID:MQyat+bt

Sorry, I guess I'm just an old-fashioned guy.

21 Name: Hon Otoko : 2007-01-15 09:07 ID:NrlVg1kb

I don't really think, I should confess to her either. Anyways, I just got off the phone with her and we arranged a second date next sunday. \o/

>>18

a japanese garden would seem fun and there is a rather large garden here. I'll go check it out tomorrow.

I have to plan this out carefully.

Oh! She has never played video games before and is interested in playing the Wii, so maybe after the garden, we'll eat then go back and introduce her to the world of games.... I hope that doesn't sound too dorky.

I'll ask her about what she thinks tomorrow, right now it's too late.

Thanks for the help guys!

22 Name: 5 : 2007-01-15 10:14 ID:XO0QGFqA

So you did end up going on a date! She brought a rose, how sweet. I'm really excited for you! The best thing now is to let her know you had a great time. Don't ask for another date just yet. Just make small talk with her, get an idea if she's interested in you (you will know if a girl wants to get rid you by trying to end the convo). Perhaps you could try "I'm just gonna head off to grab a coffee, wanna come?". Just to get a feel of where you stand before you ask her out again.

Kudos to the look :) Think of these clothes and haircut as an investment. They will certainly pay off in the future whether it be with love, confidence or even work.

23 Name: 5 : 2007-01-15 10:19 ID:XO0QGFqA

>>21
Oops sorry. Didn't read the last few posts for some reason D:
Disregard what I said about next date. Seeing as you managed a second, she sounds like she's interested alright :D

Wii sounds like a good idea. Sharing your own interests with her :)

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 10:58 ID:1D0bz80z

Maybe on like a 3rd or fourth date... you can try an amusement park at night. It is THE best.

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 12:46 ID:rZGiNPH3

Hon Otoko, what you did took courage. But "I want to look attractive that way I have a chance of her falling for me", is a wrong frame of mind to go.
One, thinking that if you do something so that she will 'fall for you', is kinda stupid coz it mostly never happens.
And just looking attractive aint going to get you the girl either. I'm sure you have noticed great looking girls with some guy who's either a bit overweight or not very attractive physically, so you can tell from that that girls dont go for 'just attractive'.
This girl of yours agreed to a date with you and gave you her number, in my opinion, is because, as I said, took a lot of courage to do what you did at the bookstore (I mean, you could have gotten beaten up badly by her bf/ex). So I think she is attracted to that courage of yours (and so you are not a coward, you just think you are), so if you wanna get out of the 'geek' shell and become bf material, you dont wanna be a wussy, it wasn't because you are a wussy that the girl agreed to go out on a date with you.
Anyways, I'm similar to what you are, Hon Otoko. I like books too and even though I try not to look it (with bleached hair and stuff), I am technically a geek too. And hey, I thought, like you did, that if I bleached my hair it would shake off my geekiness and make me more attractive in girls' eyes. Guess what? It doesn't work, though I still bleach my hair coz I like it now. Even though I'm still alone (though I was in a relationship in just under 2 months), I now can at least have girls talking to me as I try to talk to them. It doesn't land me a gf, but it's a start.
Anyways, all I can end this with is the cliche "be yourself". If you did read/watch Densha Otoko you will remember at the end that he was being himself, as an otaku.

26 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-15 14:08 ID:gje+pxhy

Yeah. Doing this Jekyll & Hyde type of act is just hard to follow through and it's much easier just to be yourself than wear a disguise all the time around someone. Don't worry about sounding dorky, it's just how some people are. Me included :/

Also, buying new clothes and a haircut might seem like blowing your cash, but at least you now have something nice to wear.

Good luck on your second date. I mean, wow. Things seem to be going smooth...... maybe even too smooth. (oh lawd teh suspense!)

27 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 14:28 ID:Heaven

>>25
I don’t see quite what you’re saying in that post, but it is quite clear that Hon isn’t trying to change the fact that he’s an otaku; he just wants to dress a little smarter. He is definitely in the right “frame of mind”. The road he’s heading down is the road of self improvement. He’ll gain more confidence and make more of an impression. In no way is he hiding his “otaku self”- heck, he even wants to invite the girl to play wii with him. This is what I would call a healthy makeover. No plastic surgery or personality change is involved.

28 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 17:48 ID:TxaKas4j

>>27
Yes this guy is right, just because you are otaku doesn't mean you have to wear around anime shirts all day! Even if you do, you can still do it in style right? Just because you want to look good doesn't mean you are turning your back on your love for anime and games! I think Hon Otaku has had the right idea from the start. Just be yourself and continue dating her! I am still curious to hear how this will progress!

29 Name: fart man : 2007-01-15 19:25 ID:LyZOZ+g7

im wondering if the person on the photo is really him. it looks like a pic which was taken in a photo studio. who that knows common sense get his own pic taken at a studio just to show "secret Admires" how he look like now?

if the guy was really him, id say its a fashion that he cant go wrong with

30 Name: Hon Otoko : 2007-01-15 20:07 ID:NrlVg1kb

>>29

What?! I have never once said the photo was me. >:O

31 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-15 23:03 ID:Heaven

Some how I just can't believe this story is real...

32 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-16 10:42 ID:MQyat+bt

Whether his story is true or not, Hon has only said that he now dresses something like that guy in the photo.

I believe that the actual guy in the photo is a South-Korean actor.

33 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-17 10:54 ID:L4LvKmq8

Keep us updated. I don't think it's fake but even if it is, it's still interesting.

34 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-17 11:16 ID:1D0bz80z

We're waiting for your update Hon-kun ~

35 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-19 16:26 ID:BOSfNKX1

Way to go Hon. Like others said, for being such a "geek", you've got some serious guts and lots of potential. She was most likely very impressed with your confidence in that moment, keep it up. And dont' make the mistake of changing so much for her. If you do end up falling in love, she won't care how geeky you are. My fiance isn't really into anime, and doesn't care that I am because she loves me and I love her. And I'm not going to change that about me, or much of anything else for that matter. Confidence will win you the battle my friend. Do something unexpected and nice for her. I go by the rule of thumb "5 minutes of surprise consideration for her gets you a day full of rewards". Next date, bring some flowers or some other random goody to surprise her, it will tell her you've been thinking about her enough to get her something. Its worked wonders for me :). Good luck

36 Name: Hon Otoko : 2007-01-20 11:06 ID:XkgnLP7A

Thank you for your help. There's a reason why I haven't been able to update for a long time. I took the Japanese garden advice, it wasn't exactly a japanese garden, more like the Botanical gardens. She called me the day afterwards and asked me if I wanted to go see 'Night of the Museum' I was confused because the date was scheduled for sunday, it turns out that her friends was unable to watch the movie with her and she didn't want to go alone.. I jumped at the chance... I arrived at the movie theater waiting for her to show up, we both paid our way, and went to see the movie(boring skipskip).
After the movie, I took her to the botanical garden, and we walked to each garden with her admiring and smiling brightly.
During the walk we started talking more. I discovered that her favorite type of flowers are lillies, she prefer dogs more than cats and her favorite dog is Shiba Inu, and she is no good with computers.

Okay, So, I pulled a Densha Otoko and offered to build her a new computer(with spare parts, I have laying around) and hook her up to the internet and teach her how to use it... hopefully, the samething doesn't happen and she discovers this. I finished building the computer and now i'm really nervous about going to her place. I have never been into a girl's apartment before..

After, the walk through the garden, we went to the zoo, which was right across the garden. She grabbed my hand and dragged me from each exhibit, during the whole time, my face was deep red.. I kept thinking, "oh my god." So, anyways, after the Zoo, we stopped at the nearby cafe for a drink and snack, during that time she said something that made me swallow..HARD, she wanted me to come and visit her family this sunday...

So, that's the reason for the sudden change....

OK, ALERT TIME, I am NO GOOD at meeting with parents. Urg, This will be scary as hell!

37 Name: TEENAGER : 2007-01-20 12:22 ID:gje+pxhy

So I guess you are still going to that meeting.

But hey, man, look at the bright side. You're doing great so far!
Plus I doubt that there will be any problems with the parents, as she obviously likes you. So unless you do something to offend her parents, then you will be rolling high soon :P

38 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-21 08:14 ID:JsWC10VO

I think her parents will like you. Just be polite and everything should be ok.

39 Name: blinker : 2007-01-21 10:41 ID:6BlSzoOh

I think meeting her parents will be hard, but I'm hope that it will turn-out well, just try being at your best.

40 Name: blinker : 2007-01-21 10:43 ID:6BlSzoOh

that should be "hoping" sorry.

41 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-21 11:00 ID:1D0bz80z

Depends...

what nationality is she? I usually find asian parents really picky.

42 Name: pen : 2007-01-22 02:06 ID:cPKXVno7

hmmm, for some reason, im just finding this story a little hard to believe. if hon here is telling the truth, i truly wish him the best of luck in his endevours, but as it stands, well, it just strikes me as unlikely that we have an actual densha otoko on our hands. its likely were being hoaxed.

43 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-22 02:44 ID:Heaven

>>42
well what made densha otoko, densha otoko was his storytelling and the context of his story, whether true or not. densha Otoko is special because it was an interactive piece of writing that the readers took part in writing it and it was a fairly nice one it, actually, it could have been partly true, he might have then gotten rejected and written the rest as a false happy ending it w/e.

anyone trying to crate a new densha otoko will fail unless they have some story telling talent.

44 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-22 03:00 ID:AXQYgxhf

you know, i think there are almost as many people who want to engineer the next densha otoko as people who want to BE the next densha otoko. if it was fake (for the record, i think it was), it was probably the single best troll of all time.

45 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-22 03:29 ID:JsWC10VO

It possibly could be fake, but who knows?

46 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2007-01-22 04:03 ID:n2GthrQy

OP READ ME!!!!!!!

FAKE! This situation just doesn't happen! Especially when an event such as this has already happened and could only do so ONCE IN A LIFETIME! But being the gullible, naive geeky 15 year old I am....I play along.

#41's What nationality is she question really makes a difference. If your of different heritage, the family of hers will immediately come to judge you cause they'd always expect their child to be with a man of the same color. No hard feelings but it's true. I've seen it before and have watched the horrible outcome. But if there really nice, they wouldn't care. Just act normal...REPHRASE that....normal as in yourself. Don't try hard to impress and don't go all Densha with the shaking. TALKING IS AN IMPORTANT ROLE IN A DINNER FOR ANY OCCASION! keep a conversation going with the family but n ot to caught up in it that your Dreamgirl isn't included. If she has nothing to say try to change the subject of her interest and again don't let anyone left out. Manners are also a big part in a dinner. Even if you have no experience do your best. I had dinner with a buch of the best students in school who all happened to be girls. It was very awkward and scary at the same time. TIme seemed to slow down with me trying to being all mannerly so don't get that in your head.

47 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-22 06:04 ID:Heaven

I think this story is fake. Just look at it this way. He is going to meet her parents after 2 dates... within a one week time span. That is a little rushed for a relationship, especially one where she still has a boyfriend.

Also when the couple was having the argument, which was bad enough, where security was about to be called in, then how come the boyfriend just stopped and did nothing to the OP? Not even said a word. And if the OP was brave enough to drag from the situation, then why was he too afraid to call her that night?

She giving him a rose on the first date, I hardly can believe that. And that she is a college student that does not know how to use the internet, that is not possible. There is so much more that I cannot swallow as being true.

*Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.
-Buddha*

48 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-22 10:56 ID:VzynJE0Q

>>47
Yeah, that's true. Everything is going toooo smoothly..

But one thing I will take away from reading this:

> She giving him a rose on the first date..

Would guys like this :D?

49 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-22 12:02 ID:1D0bz80z

>>47

Although I find Hon-kun's story hard to believe, it's a common thing to meet parents within a few dates. I mean it really depends on your background. I met my bf's mother on the first date and it wasn't a serious.. "Mum, I'm going to marry this girl." thing. It's not formal either.

Meeting parents is common among my friends. But even though we're asian, my parents and his parents are pretty open.

I was also given a bracelet within a week we dated. So the whole rose thing on a date. I think it's cute, but to me roses don't mean a lot... it's just saying "i like you".

So we all really can't make conclusions, as I said before it really depends on their nationalities, circumstance, etc. Courting and the expectations of dating are entirely different across other cultures and people.

50 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-22 20:58 ID:Heaven

>if I could name someone that she looks similar to, it would be Jennifer Morrison

Becaue of this I assume that they are in America. And it is true that you can meet the parents early, but the way she makes it sound is quite formal. Girls want you to meet their parents because they really like the guy and want their parent's approval of the guy so she can go the long haul with him. A week is two short of a time to decide that. But there is no real hard evidence, just assumption.

I met parents on the first date, but I was just picking her up and while she was getting ready I just chatted with them, real informal.

51 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-01-27 13:54 ID:Heaven

Lol...looks like last few posts killed the thread.

52 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-02-02 03:54 ID:oNSnetiJ

Hon died... <_<

53 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-02-02 06:47 ID:Heaven

>>52
Everyone saw through his facade.

54 Name: fart man : 2007-02-02 06:57 ID:LyZOZ+g7

no, he is stroking his cock. she ditched him...

55 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-02-02 21:48 ID:Heaven

called it!

56 Name: Moomoo : 2007-02-15 05:51 ID:PMYSoUrq

play it cool dont change so much just do casual cool fix your hair. use sweet talk in phycology for women, it is said that girls like emotion in a guy therefore just beign aloof or kind and saying nice compliment s will make her feel good. its also kinda strange but girls go for aloof guys that ignore them wierd but ive seen oh so many times.well im bored....

57 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-02-15 18:06 ID:N07S56AR

Hon died.

>>48

Flowers are nice to look at, but it'll be awkward for the guy to carry the flower(s) around.
Get him an accessory -- something nice to put on his cell phone, or on his keychain, etc. Something small that'll be visible, looks nice, isn't too expensive, and doesn't have to be carried around like a rose (it won't wilt away like a flower either).

Is this Densha material yet

58 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-02-16 00:16 ID:Heaven

sage this thread...this is a fake story.

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