im a guy. currently 19, studying FineArts, on my 2nd year (which actually ends tom, cuz summer is here). I'd say, ever since i moved to my current university, i've been, sort of a wreck in terms of socializing. Back in HighSchool, i had a nice number of friends... and i was sort of the "ringleader" so to speak. But here in my current uni., im most likely alone, i tried to hand along with my course-mates, but i feel forced in doing so.. i could not relate to them, and the biggest (most frustrating part) many people have an immediate assumption that im either a fag or a total perv, due to my fandom for japanese idols. (which tends to be the subject of my art, most of the time)
anywhoo. Back in freshman year, i met this girl who was taking up english-literature... she was younger, smarter, quite average looking (at that time), but still cute. her most distinct feature are her puffy big eyes. We easily became friends, due to one thing, we both had the same interests in music/movies, we worshiped a lot of japaense bands,(how geek right?). We were budding otakus, more or less, exchanging photobooks, cd's, and stuff. We used to chat all day about the latest H!P gossip, or get excited to the latest Quluri single, and watched this Gackt PV's together, and even trade JAV's (lol).. and so on. Eventually, we'd talk about, what "normal" people would talk about. School, politics, and life in general. I enjoyed our discourses.
I did the stupid thing of asking her out/makin a move. She freaked, and totally disappeared. I mean, from then on, she hid from me, in our classes together, she'd always come-in late, so she'd be left sitting at the back, avoiding me. Okay, i decided not to do anything about it, and moved on. 2 semesters pass (a year) and we've had no contact, and i was sorta miserable again, being a semi-loner in a big university, (but at that time, my art proggessed, no disctracions i guess :P). Then out of the blue, some random person placed a comment on my blog, i ddint know it was her then, and just ignored it.. a few days later, i got a message in my AIM, "this is my new email" or soemthing.. so, okay. I didnt really have motivation to be friendly with her again, so, i rarely msg'd her or anything. But then, she'd chat to me, daily, about school, funny stuff about her friends, and even relationship problems.. (of course, japanese stuff was still the topic most of the time)
i was thinking to myself, why? is this a call for a truce or something? So i went along with it, next thing i knew, we shared 3 classes together. But, the strange thing, we'd rarely talk in real life, apart from the hi's and hello's. But in chat, we'd be up for hours, ranting about anything and everything.. i'd figured this was not healthy. So i tried to lessen my online hours, and actually, tried to hang out with her.. but it fails, she's got her own crowd, or was busy and stuff... i don't know.
point is, i still like her, and it's not helping that within those 2 sems, she seemed to have bloomed, from a shy silent type, to an pretty blantant and cute intellectual... and i still like her. haha. sorta. Whenever she tell stories about her suitors, and how she denys them, or her crushes, and etc.. i get a feeling of jealousy. hrmm...
advice? do someting or disconnect ties?
Disconnect. She sounds too immature to handle a relationship, I wouldn't waste my time on what will probably lead to a broken heart.
No harm in talking to her.
It's been a year. Her avoiding you could have meant anything. You should ask her.
Talk to her more, but I can't emphasize how important it is to talk in real life instead of chat.
Yay! another person who type thoughts and feelings carefully, not ragged - FO love to read coherent text!
So there is girl you like but girl is holding off any close conversation. Currently, you like the girl and you know that in friend setting, relation works ok and you want more. Problem, half a year ago you no have luck and she leave you in cold. Then she reignite fire but mainly hide behind internet. Correct?
Frigid Onanoko not know ho relation with her looked like exactly, before she cut you off. Also not know how you ask her for more. However, girl sound like wanna be in control of things, and you asking did not fit in her schedule. Perhaps, you in wrong place of her schedule, perhaps you never in her schedule to begin with. Her reinitiating contact show that she felt she overreacted 1 year ago.
Other direction that can think of is that you also did something else, or that you really really messed up somehow back then when or before asking her out.
Everybody know that chatting with boy (girl), with coffee and cake, on the computer, sucks when compared to chatting with boy (girl), with coffee and cake, on a terrace. You want to move to the terrace, but she avoid all terraces with you. Now for the advice.
She closed the door on you. Then she open it again, the little bitch. You wanna write her that she need to step through the door, or you gonna close it for her. It perfectly fair to ask why she keep you behind internet - are you not good enough to be around her? (maybe you not wanna ask so direct). Anyway, she already know you like her. It not unfair to write her letter and tell her that you value her, but that you want to see more of her in real life. Otherwise, it will keep feeling like one of those marriages where the partners have their separate beds, on the opposite sides of the room. Please let FO not have to in explain that part... Hm, this not much advice, really, but then situation is not super clear yet!
Saying good bye now!
p.s. make sure to draw a piano once. Draw it so well that a pianist wanna play it right then and there. (FO love piano)