disillusioned with women? (19)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-03-31 04:07 ID:yBUhhk2d

lately, I've been feeling poorly on the whole dating thing. Not because I'm afraid to be rejected (although that may be a root cause), but instead, even if I'm friends with a girl, even if she's really attractive, I can't imagine wanting to go out with her. Anyone else feel like that? I've never had a positive experience with any girl, and I'm more just sick of it. I can't comprehend a girl actually ASKING me to do something, let along talk to me in any way other than just a friendly acquaintance sort of way, but if that did happen I can't conceive of a possible situation in which I would be happy being with any girl. I'm just wondering if anyone else has ever been like this.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-03-31 04:18 ID:8olcL3Vn

Do you think you might be gay?

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-03-31 07:19 ID:Tj1I/vLg

I feel the same way. I've had a few bad experiences with women. Right now I'm at the point where I don't even want to be bothered with them (in a relationship kind of way). My co-workers kind of look at me weird when I display no interest whatsoever in the opposite gender. It's a temporary phase, at least for me it is. Right now I'm not exactly sour from my past relationships, but I know what I'm getting into if I got into another one. Basically, I don't feel like dealing with the bullshit again. And there's a lot of bullshit to be dealt with especially if you're dealing with women. Like I said, I'm not gay, I just know how women are, and for the time being, I don't want to deal with that shit.

4 Name: Kira : 2007-03-31 08:35 ID:xHEMZMUJ

Yeah I agree... You don't have to be gay to be not interested in girls... I mean you can be neutral... Not gay or not looking for a girl. And people should respect you for that. People calling people gay because they don't feel attracted to the opposite is insulting both straight and gay people... And they should be ashamed for calling you gay.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-03-31 16:12 ID:8olcL3Vn

I didn't mean to be insulting by asking if you thought you might be gay. I just thought that since you say you have no romantic interest in women whatsoever, that it might be a possibility you hadn't yet considered.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-03-31 16:59 ID:RZmukwOV

I feel that way immediately after I masturbate.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-03-31 17:14 ID:yBUhhk2d

for me at least, it's not that I'm not attracted to them, far from it, I am very attracted to women, I just can't imagine a realistic situation where I would meet a girl and enjoy myself. So it's not no interest whatsoever, but rather not wanting to even get into the relationship thing. I suppose in that way I agree with 3.

8 Name: Warez Otoko : 2007-04-01 22:56 ID:9ysfqoqb

I think that the only true way to be happy with women is to go for the fuck, before developing deep feelings and attachment... and when this happens, just leave her.
When we have feelings we are already on the way to our doom, it always ends badly, because it's the only way it can 'end' in fact, and often when it ends it ruins the entire thing by giving a period of shitty moods as long as the time you were happy with the girl.
Most women want to have us emotionally attached BEFORE we fuck them, they are the smartest in such things... but I think it can be done anyway, there are many girls nowadays who want to have fun without messing with the mind.
Because I learnt this the very-hard way, I'll be sure not to have any more relationships starting by chat : chatting is the sure way to have yourself emotionally attached to the woman too fast.

9 Name: Seraphius : 2007-04-05 05:48 ID:tsjuSjW1

>>8

Wow, how poetic. Don't reproduce.

10 Name: CABLE : 2007-04-05 11:56 ID:kWYFNmof

>chatting is the sure way to have yourself emotionally attached to the woman too fast.

Because you can't see her face, and so you don't have a constant feeling of wanting to jump on her.

How about you guys take this as an weak phase ? Because you know... It's like you are running away from commitment because you can be hurt, it's ok to be like that, just don't start to think to much about it!

Love is there for everyone, even for those who lost faith in it for various reasons! I know some people that had some serious issues like the ones talked about here (with bigger reasons for it but whatever), and right now they are living happily yet again.

That's the way life goes !

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-04-14 09:12 ID:g5ycyPYQ

You guys keep saying "that's how women are," but women are pretty tired of "how men are," too.

Not caring about being in a relationship isn't a bad thing. At least it's better than not being able to stay single for at least a week or something like that. Issues, much?

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13 Post deleted by moderator.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-04-15 04:14 ID:i3XWmyWu

I just can't imagine a realistic situation where I would meet a girl and enjoy myself.

15 Name: madman's horse : 2007-05-27 00:05 ID:HxQ7uCzl

you could always experiment with a relative like your mother.

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-05-27 03:03 ID:RR30KULV

>>1
did you ever think you might be gay???

>>15
thats just weird

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-05-27 13:33 ID:Rsro5Vgg

>>1

I'm mostly the same way, though I've never even been friends with a girl.

I want to be with someone, to feel what love and romance and all that is really like, but then I look around at college or work and despair. Sure, there are girls there, and I'm sure more than a few fof them would be considered hot by most guys, but I jut feel nothing.

Doesn't matter who the girl is, what she looks like, or how she acts. Nothing.

There's no urge compelling me to get close to any of them, no drive to start up a conversation, even. Hell, even if I'm sitting behind a girl in class and she leans forward, causing her underwear to ride up out of her jeans in the back, there's not even the faintest stirring of activity down below. I can't even get sexually excited by girls.

I know I'm not gay. I once followed the lines of reasoning expressed by some in this thread and concluded that if I am not attracted to girls, I must be attracted to men. Suffice it to say, that reasoning didn't apply in my case. I will never again look at gay porn.

But I can't look at porn of real girls, either. It just doesn't DO anything for me. The only porn that's ever had any effect on me is hentai. The only girls I've ever felt attracted to are creations of ink and paint (or pixels and phosphors), not flesh and blood. And that sort of attraction, obviously, will never lead to the love or romance that I yearn for. But it does help ease the pain, if only temporarily. It's still possible to feel lonely even when cuddling up to an anime girl body pillow, believe me.

So, tl;dr -- I want to be in a relationship, but the only girls I'm attracted to are fictional. The contradiction here is somewhat obvious, but the only solution appears to be an epic orz of hopelessness and despair.

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-05-27 21:52 ID:Heaven

>I know I'm not gay. I once followed the lines of reasoning expressed by some in this thread and concluded that if I am not attracted to girls, I must be attracted to men.
> The only girls I've ever felt attracted to are creations of ink and paint (or pixels and phosphors), not flesh and blood.

Your whole post sounds too much as if it could have been written by my significant other four years ago when we were just best friends. He's quite sexual nowadays, though. As well as obviously being into females. :-3 His occasional whining about thinking he was an asexual (possibly an asexual bisexual even) completely made me think there was no way in hell I'd have a chance with him (being a real flesh and blood female, rather than 2D), so I dated another guy. Amusingly enough, seeing me being in a(n unhappy) relationship made him realize after a year or two that he felt more than just friendship for me, and we hooked up shortly after me and my ex split up.

But yeah... You might be just simply asexual? Nothing wrong with that.
Or just repressing your true feelings, as they might seem like futile folly. The painful kind of folly, which you'd rather pretend didn't exist than actually risk getting hurt.

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-05-28 08:44 ID:Heaven

>>8 So truth that hurts.

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