How do you know you don't want a real relationship if you never had sex ? Have you ever fallen in love, and I mean REALLY FALLEN IN LOVE, not some stupid teenage crush.

Falling in love only happens when you are at a peak of your life, for example, when your work is going great/you make something that makes people notice you (for the good reasons, don't do anything stupid!)/you simply are happy, and in love with something.

What you need is passion, and not necessarily a woman, but I believe that having a woman in your life, and even experimenting sex would be a great step into understanding passion. It's a hard process honestly, so good luck if you ever decide do go this way.

Also, you can no longer numb yourself because:
1) Family pressure
2) You don't have passion for anime/games any longer.

Solutions are:
1) Be honest, completely, wholly, FULLY honest.
2) Find a new passion, experiment basic things like writing, drawing, programming.

It all comes down to this: men, NEED passion, no matter how much you deny it, passion makes you feel alive, and makes your existence mean something. Numbing yourself like you are trying to is for angsty nerds who can't accept that they are truly alive, and that they have the strength to do whatever they feel like.