So I like this girl (23)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-29 21:03 ID:TqQUPFN8

i have classes with her twice a week and we sometimes have dinner (on campus) after the class. I kind of just met this girl too. How should I approach her? How long should I wait for me to tell her I like her something? Give me some advice on the build ups please

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-29 21:32 ID:FG5TDwMg

Don't tell her you like her. Instead, ask for a date. the longer you wait, the easier it is for her to classify you as a friend only and move on. So, Basically. just say, "Hey, lets go out, movies, friday night."
Or something similar to that. Just make sure it's a date and note some friendly friends only thing.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-29 22:05 ID:0RhZHq5t

Invite her out. If you are too nervous to make it a date, invite some of your mutual friends too.

Worked for me!

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-29 22:07 ID:0RhZHq5t

edit: I guess it helps if your mutual friends don't show up, and becomes a date by accident :)

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 02:00 ID:2DR45tK1

The best thing really is to just cut to the chase and downright fuck her, straight away.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 02:06 ID:TqQUPFN8

OP

damn i don't know if i have the courage to do that. I mean what the hell am i going to do if she says no or something.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 03:21 ID:2DR45tK1

lol'd

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 03:58 ID:FG5TDwMg

>>6
Here are your options if she says no:

  1. Kill yourself
  2. Become her stalker
  3. Move the fuck on.

Choose one. It's either confess, or keep stalling until she finds herself a guy that ISN'T you.

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 04:31 ID:TqQUPFN8

ok then tell if a guy gets rejected by a girl can they still become friends?

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 04:40 ID:YTeeTw29

Flirt.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 04:46 ID:x2+5FS6q

Don't come on too strong in the beginning, do some things as friends and/or with other friends. But don't wait too long either, thats risking getting friend zoned, you should feel like a good time to ask, not to soon and not so far as she's made her mind up about you. And when you do ask her out I'd suggest keeping it as casual as possible, your second date should be the one that sends the "hey I really am interested" signal. What you do from then on should be determined by her reactions.

As for the "she might say no" thing, yea she might, but thats a risk that always occurs, you can't get around it only through it.

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 12:24 ID:2DR45tK1

Wanna know what this "friend zone" bullshit is about? It's when the girl in question knows you so well she can already see all the flaws a possible relationship would eventually break down into.

Unless she would settle for a fuck-budy like a common harlot, that means she will be more inclined not to fall in love with you because you're not what she wants. Or perhaps, if she has so good character and it's highly unusual, she might supress her feelings on the grounds that it would never work anyway.

In the long run, no man is what a woman wants, it's just a question of how long it takes for her to figure it out or how morally stubborn she is.

I mean seriously, why would it be so wrong to also be together with a good friend? Any enduring relationship requires friendship to begin with. It should be renamed from "friend-zone" to "got your number-zone".
So what these people are saying is; fuck her before she knows you're a friggin retard.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 12:51 ID:GUFC/XkK

Say hello, start chatting, ask her out.

That is all.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-09-30 19:37 ID:myGfR1FA

>>13
Agreed. This "love confession" bullshit may look great in anime, but in real life it's for middle schoolers. You don't need to say "I like you" - if you ask her out on a date, she'll know that you like her.

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-05 11:09 ID:hTSEKZKc

"ok then tell if a guy gets rejected by a girl can they still become friends?"

Yes, it's easily possible, and has happened a couple of times to myself.

Don't be scared of rejection, seriously. Everyone hypes up asking out a girl so much, but after a few times of doing it, you really don't care anymore :P

It's not that you become a jaded person and don't feel love or something, it's like... Playing paintball for the first time(?!).

You're always scared of being hit, but after getting hit a lot, you really don't care about it anymore and just play the game to have fun.

The more time you spend being scared of asking her out, the more time you've lost with someone who could be really special, neeee

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-05 15:32 ID:XvFZVpPu

If you're going to say "it's a date" then you might as well say you like her. They mean the same thing anyway, it's just a matter of preference.

As for anime, I wonder if that's just how it works in Japan or if it's completely bullcrap from their perspective too. I want to know because the girl I have my eyes on at the moment is from Japan.

17 Name: k : 2007-10-06 08:48 ID:iTP2Z9gN

How long does it is after the first "friend date" to ask her for a real date?

18 Name: Nice Guy : 2007-10-06 11:04 ID:hTSEKZKc

>>16

She's Japanese, or living in Japan?

The two are very different things ;p

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-06 13:54 ID:XvFZVpPu

That much is true. She's Japanese, but not living there now. I usually talk to her in Japanese so my exposure to a lot of anime where confessions are the norm is taking a toll on my sanity.

20 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-06 14:04 ID:FG5TDwMg

The thing you gotta wonder though is if she lived in Japan during most of her High School years atleast. If she has, It would be appropriate to ask, but if she's just japanese but lived in American all her life. Forget it.

21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-06 15:38 ID:VLAXPseV

well im the op here and the girl i like is chinese actually

22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-06 19:15 ID:iTP2Z9gN

Then change your name to secret admirer to another one so we can recognize you. lol

23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-10-06 19:17 ID:iTP2Z9gN

If she is chinese then maybe its the same as if she were japanese, with confession and that stuff.

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