i think she cheated on me (30)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-17 22:17 ID:y1EMZmmw

It's not really an i think, but more of a dreaded "i know she did" kinda thing. i'm just gonna get your guys opinions before breaking up with her

Story:
she said she was going to "camp" for 2 weeks. while at "camp" she met this guy, and he had a "girlfriend" for 3 years. she invited him to her "dorm room" while they were alone so he could use her "laptop" to talk to his "girlfriend". turns out, she came to me 3 days later saying she was never in camp (i caught her, because she was talking about being in her room). so she apologized and it. but then, when she let me into her myspace (she wanted me to "hack" it) i went to her inbox, because at that time she was acting really suspicious. turns out, she was trash takling me to her friend, and then her friend was like "well, he shouldnt trust you after you did "that" with (name here) ;]" so i ask her friend about it, and after threatening (blackmailing) her she told me she had sex with him. i come to my gf about it, and she says he "raped" her. and right now, i'm just like "fucking bull shit. why did you trash talk me and tell her that you had sex with him?" and she told me that her friend didnt like me, she wanted us to fail and she was tired of trying to defend me against them and she just wanted to tell them what they wanted to hear. and she said she told her friend she had sex with him because that's what her friend wanted her to do. so now, i'm just ready to break up with her. she lies about a lot of things, and she's trying desperatly to cover this one up.

this is what just happend on the phone,
i called her, i confronted her about it again, she said she cant talk about it because she's not supposed to be on the phone, i continue to confront her, she tries to change the subject, i dont let her, she then says that she doesnt want to talk about it because whenever she thinks about it it gives her "flashbacks" of the rape that apperantly happend in her room. so, I'm gonna break up with her tonight.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-17 22:24 ID:Heaven

C'mon now, of course she cheated on you. This is more obvious than a giant transsexual parrot on the moon in a turban waving a giant Nazi flag saying "Polly want a -- SHE FUCKING CHEATED ON YOU." Break up with her.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-17 22:25 ID:9RA0ViW4

What are you waiting for?

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-17 23:06 ID:LKK3wD40

>>2
lol'd

Break up indeed.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-17 23:11 ID:hkdL0dfw

my God...wat da world has our youth gone through?

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 00:53 ID:Heaven

lol fucking drama

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 02:30 ID:i7Bqg+gV

wtf is this, just as bad as my friend. def break up, dont hesitate man. Shes a skank whore and you know it

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 05:01 ID:y1EMZmmw

idk how she did it. maybe i'm just too soft of a person. but she convinced me she didnt have sex with him. idk, call me an idiot, because i know i am. but, i mean she wouldnt have gotten all emotional like she did if she didnt care about me yea? i'm not saying i'm just gonna let this go. when i see her in vegas in about... 2 months (yea, it's an LDR. and yes, we dated 5 months before she moved) i'm gonna confront her about it in person. she cant look a person straight in the eye when she lies, no matter who it is or what it is about.
but... idk, i really do think she cheated on me. but I love her so much, and i dont want to lose her for anything. or risk losing her on a false accusation.

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 05:05 ID:Heaven

If you want to believe she didn't, you have to believe it and kill every last trace of suspicion.

You need trust for a couple to work (and it's even worse in LDR). As soon as you have doubt, distrust, and suspicion, you can consider it dead.

I'm dead serious - if you think she's worth it, it's case closed. If you come back to that later it will be proof you don't trust her. And then...

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 05:07 ID:ykGqp/Ch

>>8

It's fine, you're not an idiot. But she is a dirty slut and this is painfully obvious to everyone, even you. Shit can't go on, man.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 07:30 ID:YAavwGuq

SHE CHEATED ON YOU! Use your mind and think of the situation. Obviously if she was raped she would have told you and would have been a bit disturbed. It's long distance? Great! Break up with her with an email. This person did not respect you enough to be faithful, hell she did not respect you enough to tell the truth. Why do you have to be polite and break up with her in person? Plus it will make it easier for you anyway.

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 08:30 ID:Vux/H/Xo

She cheated on you. She even lied about going away to camp? She's getting all emotional because she doesn't want to lose her dignity, which would happen if you dump her and it becomes common knowledge that she is a cheater.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 15:48 ID:rAvViTJZ

Make up a fun nickname for her, one that incorporates both her name and a swear word. Like Jennifer -> Jenniwhore. (I'm sure you can come up with something better than that.) Then spread the word 'round town so everybody will know her for the cheating cunt she is.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-18 22:48 ID:C31U/qOm

i agree wit >>12...if she can't trust u enough 2 express her darkest feelings upfront and personal (immediately)...then wat's da purpose of this relationship?

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-19 04:53 ID:SGD9f+3j

this sounds like a retarded episode of Law & Order: SVU.

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-19 08:40 ID:y1EMZmmw

okay, so basically she somehow convinced me not to break up with her and to give her a second chance. and you guys wanna know what the sad part is, and why i'm such an idiot? i want everything she says to be true. i want her to not be cheating on me, and i want to still be with her. I mean, i am in love with her. more than i thought. I am seriously so in love with her that i would do anything and i cant imagine life without her which is why it make this whole sitution that much more painful. I dont want to be without her, and i dont want to lose her. I realize i want her so bad. I just finished watching Juno with the fam-bam and i miss her. i miss her so much and i want to be with her so bad. that's why i think i'm an idiot, and i guess you could say this thread is basically over now.
but dont get me wrong, if shet like this happens again it's done

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-19 09:49 ID:Heaven

>>16
Then make sure she knows well that last fact.

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-19 10:04 ID:MCNCUM0M

You're a fucking idiot.

If this happens again, you're only going to do the same thing and she will keep walking all over you.

Have fun.

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-19 10:08 ID:8rPUMrbM

You've set a dangerous precedent there. She can do what she wants, and get away with it. Do you really think that you'll be able to say goodbye if she does this again? Bear in mind that you might not even know if she does this again. Consider that she has already shown that she is capable of cheating, and you have shown you are capable of forgiving all, because you can't let go. This will be no less painful next time. Good luck anyway.

20 Name: >>7 : 2008-04-19 23:08 ID:KOHaojSL

Gambatte wit ur relationship...u'll never kno wat will happen in da relationship...so u just keep goin'. I'm glad dat u still have feelin's 4 her...but also b realistic 'bout wat happened just recently. As long as u kno da consequences of goin' through this...u and ur grl can probably get out of this in one piece.

Also...4 a lil extra support...maybe u 2 need 2 go 2 a counselor or psychiatrist (sry...i can't spell dat).

21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 00:15 ID:Heaven

22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 00:51 ID:y1EMZmmw

well, i decided that this is the plan i am going to try. the next few months, i will show her just how much i love her. i will be there for her 24/7, and i will constantly remind her how much i love her (she loves that sorta thing) and i'll get "cheesy" for her too (she also loves this) and if all of that does not work, and i find out that she continues the cheating, i will realize that things just wont ever work out and i need to move on with my life. And yes, i will be able to pull out if this happens again. But, wish me luck. and hope that this will turn out well...

23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 01:15 ID:Heaven

>>22

the best way to make a woman lose an interest on you

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 01:47 ID:Heaven

>>22

You're an idiot. You obviously didn't want advice in the first place, so leave please.

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 02:51 ID:KOHaojSL

>>24

and you probably must shun people in real life...

Don't listen to the last two >>22...you're fine. At least you are making your on decisions...whether you are taking our advice or not.

26 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 03:13 ID:T5ppzH7P

UMMMM Do you all remember the first American Pie Movie****** This on time in Band Camp*****

27 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 03:28 ID:Heaven

28 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 19:59 ID:Vux/H/Xo

You're setting yourself up to be walked over again and again. Even if you do forgive her (that's up to you), you guys need to work through this. It's not right for you to throw yourself 110% back into the relationship. Don't be afraid to have a rough patch, where her cheating is still hovering over the relationship. If you can work through that the relationship could be stronger than ever. Forgiving it straight away won't help because she will think "oh wow I can just fuck anybody I want when I feel physically lonely and he will still be there on the end of the phone to reassure me when i feel emotionally lonely"

29 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-20 21:43 ID:Heaven

>>22

^checks ID^

Yep, you're brain dead.

30 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-04-21 04:18 ID:kXeKWMbW

Don't you love denial?

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