What the HELL?!!! (28)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 02:42 ID:fEwPgm+U

Okay, my girlfriend broke up with me- about 3 months ago- and left me for another guy. I said "Well, I can't make you love me, so I guess I'll just let you go..." and she asked if we could remain friends. I said yes, and we kept in touch.

However, I gotta say, it's been tough. I really miss her, and I still need time to heal... unfortunately, she doesn't seem to respect that. When she asks me "Are you doing okay?" and I say something like "Eh, not really... but I'm moving forward, not gonna wallow in it, cuz that won't do nothin'. Don't worry about it too much", she gets pissed and is like "DAMMIT, WHY CAN'T YOU JUST GET OVER ME?!"

Well, the other night, she and I are chatting on AIM, and she says "Hey, remember when you and I used to (insert unspeakably kinky act here)?" Shocked, I said "Ummm... yeah, why?" "Cuz my boyfriend doesn't like it when I- oh, nevermind, you don't wanna hear it."

Well, that really hurt, and that just pissed me the fuck off. I called her out on her trying to push my buttons, and she calls me up crying, yelling at me and telling me I'm a possessive emo prick and that I just need to get over myself. I finally had enough and cut her off. I told her when she stops being a fucking cocktease and let me be, then maybe we can consider being friends. With that, I hung up on her and blocked her on AIM.

Unfortunately, now she's telling all my female friends about it and they're mad at me, saying that I'm a possessive prick who needs to get over himself. My sister- who is one of her friends- claims I am "throwing a hissy fit" and I need to get over her. I just gotta ask: is this true? Or is she just being a manipulative, crazy bitch? What the hell did I do wrong?!

2 Name: ??? : 2008-05-23 02:57 ID:1Nw5byqy

uhm.. well u know what? maybe its better to just stop communication for the moment. yea i think u did right. somehow maybe it was her who hasn't gotten over you. i am a girl myself but she's really weird aye. maybe she's trying the have the whole cake and eat it too. anyways, we all know that's not possible, aye?so i think u are right in cutting her off and i liked it when u said that when she's finally alright then to be friends after. u are really being such a nice person after all thats done to u. thats great!! will continue to cheer you on!! update us then!!

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 02:57 ID:4K00oqUD

Doesn't seem to me like you did anything wrong, OP. My advice (this coming from a girl) is to hang around your guy friends more. Possibly explain the whole thing to your sister, since she may be more likely to actually listen to your side of the story.

Also, consider telling her current boyfriend about this. If she's that much of a skank to say something like that, he deserves to know.

Now that I think about it, though, she may be having trouble getting over you. You know how in elementary school, you act mean towards the person you like? Same kind of thing, except worse.

Unless she is just a manipulative, crazy bitch, in which case RUN LIKE HELL.

4 Name: ??? : 2008-05-23 03:04 ID:1Nw5byqy

uhmm... hehe.. good point. at first i had to do a double take cause you guys had the same username, haha. so was thinking really hard out whether or not i was replying right but i was anyway, so yea you have a good point. i just hope the original poster would be able to read this and tell us what he thinks :D

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 03:36 ID:DYxxcwa8

She is being a manipulative, crazy bitch.

6 Name: ??? : 2008-05-23 03:48 ID:1Nw5byqy

uhmm.. such hard words..

7 Name: Advice : 2008-05-23 12:24 ID:pOa8BF5e

She's a worthless bitch.
She isn't good with herself with her new boyfriend and is making you suffer too so she won't feel alone in her misery.
She wants your attention but thats it.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 12:41 ID:EwWv6BZy

She is in the wrong for bringing up sex topics. That's not something you just randomly talk about with friends, she crossed the line. Also, she knew before she wrote that that it would upset you, but said it anyway and tried to cover it up by saying "oh nevermind you wouldn't want to know". By all means tell your sister that and hopefully she will defend you to her girl friends.

Also, they're claiming you aren't over her for not wanting to talk about whatever sex act you did - what the hell, I've slept with people and gotten over them but I still don't particularly want to talk with them about it. A normal friendly conversation doesn't need anything like that even if you two have hooked up.

As for the possibility that she still likes you - I'm not sure either way. It's way too hard to judge. I don't think it would be worth pursuing anyway, you are on the right track trying to get over her. Avoiding talking to her should help, or try and take control of conversations a bit more so that she doesn't bring up that kinda shit and you just have a normal chat, doesn't even need to be a long one.

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 13:50 ID:fEwPgm+U

>>Now that I think about it, though, she may be having trouble getting over you.

Uh, if she's having trouble getting over me, then why did she leave me? Puhleez.

>>By all means tell your sister that and hopefully she will defend you to her girl friends.

I told my sister and she said "Yeah, well, you could've handled it better." Whatever. What really pisses me off is that my female friends claim that she was "asking an honest question and you were being mean to her about it". Oh God, give me a fucking break here, people. Then again, this particular group of girls are really protective of each other... Anyways, it's good to know for sure now that I'm morally in the right, and well... I guess I'm gonna just keep truckin' on.

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 14:05 ID:CoDxlJWO

She's a BITCH. You did a good thing, stick with it/

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 14:09 ID:HvWrq7ov

Girls can be stupid bitches. It sounds like she loves the attention or she wouldn't provoke you like that, and she probably loves the attention/sympathy from her friends.

I'm girl, and I'm totally on your side, OP.

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 19:09 ID:85pODHQ5

Agreed with many, many posters above me.

She is clearly unhappy with her current boyfriend AND herself. She takes pleasure from the upset of others and it would've made her feel GOOD to know you were still wallowing in misery over her. Cut off communication or, if you still must talk, don't let her bait you.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 22:51 ID:fEwPgm+U

I'm going to cut off contact with her; I ain't got time to deal with this shit. That might incur her wrath further, but whatever, I'll block her # and AIM SN. If our mutual girl friends keep "siding" with her in this bullshit high-school-esque drama, then that's their problem.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-23 23:50 ID:XlblbcuV

I would just cut off contact/not talk to her. Don't play her game.

15 Name: 3 : 2008-05-24 19:22 ID:Kflpkiiz

>>9
This girl seems like she's psycho, and I know some people that would actually pull a stunt like what I mentioned. Regardless, you know her and I don't, so I can't really say anything about her motives or anything like that.

And about your sister and female friends siding with her: if you happen to have the chat log from that AIM session, I'd show it to them. Either that, or cut her out of your life entirely. You don't need an emotional leech like her.

Good luck, OP.

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-25 04:29 ID:ayD2AHzW

In my experience, the easiest and fastest way to get over some girl is to cut off all contact. If you keep her out of sight, you'll keep her out of your head. just don't dip into the pool of drama that she's starting. cut off all contact, and move on. maybe when you're finally over her, you can start talking.

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-25 04:47 ID:oeSQc59X

>>1
Well, perhaps there's some wierdness about you, you're not telling us about, yeah? Because there's always two sides of the story and people are rarely just random assholes. They all got their reasons.

So... What else about your ex-relationship could've made you come of as a possessive prick? Partiality always makes me wanna puke, but that doesn't exclude partiality to one self. Are you being honest with us, and yourself?

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-25 11:55 ID:zTXPi3O7

She's a bitch, ignore her.

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-26 14:05 ID:GJ/qtayL

I agree with >>3. Two can play at that game.

Get your sister on your side. Blood is thicker than water.
Make it look sound like you're the victim (which you are). Explain to your sister rationally, and when she says "You could have handled it better", point out that you are human. She didn't behave like an angel either, and there was no reason for your ex to spread rumours after. Once you get your sister on your side, she will probably influence the other girls to change their view.

In regards to that bullshit "honest question". If their ex-boyfriend told them about the sex he was having with his gf, how would they feel? Ask them, how are you supposed to get over her when she keeps reminding you about the sex you had?

20 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-29 12:21 ID:Lbl7XF2p

Just ignore her. Don't let yourself get too mad about these sort of things.

21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-04 05:00 ID:fEcPVNAD

OP, girl = crazy fucking bitch who should STFU.

You aren't doing a thing wrong, but you shouldn't be worried about this whole issue. If anyone tells you you're possessive, etc, then just say "Perhaps you should hear what the story was from my side before deciding that.", and then don't make an attempt to tell them unless they indicate that they want to hear.

Other than that, ignoring her will shut the stupid bitch up, or cause her friends to leave her or in-fight with her.

22 Name: Nanashi : 2008-06-04 07:12 ID:ZJRpBWkM

i think shes a slutty cunt.

i kinda had the same experience as >>1

im japanese and she is english and we were together for almost 2 years but she dumped me, 3 times for 2 times of which we made up. but right after the 3rd time, she started to see some guy from work. that was the beginning of May this year. 1 or 2 weeks after that she suddenly told me she loved me on msn and also told me that she had sex with him some days before. she was sorry for that. so i was gonna give her another chance but she never contacted me for 2 weeks. apparently she was "busy" i miss her and love her, but shes a mere slut now. so i phoned her to tell her shes a whore and that i hate her and i cut her off.

i havent got over her yet but im sure we can do it. there are better girls out there mate.

23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-04 15:15 ID:CRCQvJju

yeah that bitch just wants some drama, be glad she is gone and you don't have to deal with that her anymore. just dont play her stupid games and you will be fine

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-08 19:44 ID:fEwPgm+U

Oh God, just when I thought it was over...

...She's told a few people that I raped her. Thankfully she hasn't told any authorities that, but she told a few of our mutual female friends that.

There is an upside: my sister doesn't believe her about this; she KNOWS we were sexually active and that my ex enjoyed it thoroughly. So, now I have my sister as my ally. Still... I can't believe she's stooping this low simply because I stood up against her bullshit.

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-09 11:13 ID:ZJRpBWkM

so we've been telling you shes A FUCKING CUNT

26 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-09 11:51 ID:oeSQc59X

lol, she sounds adorable
...kill her
tomorrow

Nah, seriously, she seems to be just like every other girl. Just get used to this shit right? Now you know just how damaged she is. I know it's hard but try not to give a shit about her and go on with your life elsewhere. There's no good reason whatsoever. You should be glad it's over. And that whole school of cuntbags, just pretend they don't exist.

27 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-02-02 20:26 ID:UZhZ978C

OP here

I know this is totally 6 months late, but her new boyfriend calls me up outta nowhere today; he just dumped her because he was sick of her bullshit; partially because he thinks I'm a cool dude and she was starting to attempt to pit him against me... Among other things.

Well, anyways, he and I are grabbin' a couple of drinks this Friday and laughing our asses off about the whole situation.

28 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-02-02 21:58 ID:iwdgVVig

So could you tell the whole story? Most of us just come here for the stories... makes my day hearing a good yarn. Admittedly not as good as a good book or game of chess but it is pleasant in any case.

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