Did I drop the ball on this? (And how can I recover?) (11)

1 Name: R : 2009-06-01 17:14 ID:Mhy1D5Yl

I met this girl at a party this past weekend. It seemed like we hit it off alright, danced together, she took a photo of the two of us, we exchanged contact info, I was pleased.

According to her, it was the first or second party she'd been to and she really wasn't there that long I don't think. She left somewhere after we had danced and I saw her sitting around looking kind of bored after that (though I was occupied with friends at the time) and then I saw her take off (though she did take the time to stop a phone conversation I was having to say goodbye).

The problem is I think I jumped the gun on asking to meet up. I sent her a text the next day and, perhaps due to a combination of sleep deprivation, alcohol from the previous night, and giddiness over this, I asked her if she wanted to go out for coffee later this week by the second text, figuring it was unassuming enough.

She replied that she'd love too but was busy with a lot of homework and a part time job. That itself allowed the exchange to expand, but now I'm not sure where to go from here. I'd like to meet up with her, but I'm not sure if I dropped the ball on this. I'm not too experienced with these matters, so how would you suggest I recover from it?

2 Name: Ryuuchi : 2009-06-01 19:22 ID:eUUuR9Wn

Did you say: Well, if you have any free time, let me know so we can get that coffee together.

or

You can try calling again or text or something to contact her and ask again. Even she says she's busy with a lot of homework and part time job, a person needs at least a break from all that crap.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-06-01 21:42 ID:IRZbT4FZ

I don't think you dropped the ball. If I were you I would just continue the mailing and get to know more about her, what are her interests, tastes, etc. This will be helpful later to organize outings and activities with her.

So relax about it, and keep exchanging with her, this will encourage her to meet you again.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-06-02 04:34 ID:BSYPSnDS

what >>2 and >>3 said

5 Name: R : 2009-06-02 05:30 ID:Mhy1D5Yl

>>2
>>3

Thanks for the advice/confidence boost!

I kept it more at "Maybe we can try another time some other day" which I realize is a bit vague but my thinking was that I didn't want to press it too hard.

I fully intend to try and keep up the exchange, but obviously waiting a bit to ask again. I guess it's that part now that I'm not quite sure how to approach. So I have to ask again, any words of wisdom?

6 Name: knowing : 2009-06-02 10:22 ID:WYNCmbTb

Don't sound too eager about it. Casual with maybe a slight hint of your anticipation if you really have to, but make sure that you make her want to go with you, hook her in.

7 Name: Ryuuchi : 2009-06-02 21:57 ID:eUUuR9Wn

Take her mind off the things that she's busy on. The things that she mentioned to you: A lot of homework and part time job.

Maybe, ask her out? Give a her good time on your company with her.

8 Name: R : 2009-06-04 09:30 ID:Mhy1D5Yl

>>6
>>7

Well because I already asked about going out for coffee once before (and not too long ago) I'm unsure how long to wait too. Obviously I don't want to seem too eager, but it'd be nice to be able to meet up soon (I'm much better with face to face conversation than texting and what have you).

But since we've both become rather busy, I think suggesting something (even if it is just meeting up for coffee or something to that extent) as a break for both of us would be a good avenue.

The hook is the hard part, that I'm really not so sure about.

9 Name: popoko : 2009-06-04 12:47 ID:znwfudOc

when are you going to meet her?

10 Name: popoko : 2009-06-04 12:49 ID:znwfudOc

so when are you going to meet her?

11 Name: Payton : 2009-06-05 01:05 ID:jorJHFGU

I would say call her, not right away, too much too fast is scary for a girl, but a phone call, even if it is a short one, is nice to receive rather than a text that you can sit there and think of the perfect thing to say before sending it.

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