I met a really neat girl a couple months ago. We hit it off really well, immediately became close friends. It became apparent quickly that there was mutual romantic/physical attraction. As we progressed down that route, I realized she had a long distance boyfriend. I confronted her about it, told her we can't be the way she wanted to if she's someone's girlfriend.
That's just not fair to the other guy, if I was him I'd want me to do this.
Another month or so goes by, we're still friends at this point but she's thrashing around a lot about whether she should break up with this other boy. At first she was very dedicated to making it work, but eventually she broke down and split with him.
I saw it on facebook, but didn't mention it to her and she didn't say anything either. I didn't feel it was right to rekindle our romance so soon after she broke up so I resolved to maintain friendliness until she seems open to romance again.
Extenuating circumstances resulted in me not seeing her in person for a couple days. Today our study group got together and there was a curious new member. The two of them were doing the typical stupid fucking couple shit: caressing, kissing, etc.
First, WTF, we're trying to study here, bitch.
SECOND, WTF? Tell me you want to finish things up with your old boyfriend, break up with him and DAYS LATER A NEW BOY?
FUCK THAT BITCH.
FUCK ALL BITCHES.
This is the fourth consecutive time I've failed, and the second consecutive time I've been lead on and backstabbed.
FUCK BITCHES, GET MONEY.
At least I'm now motivated to be rich and amazing at everything just to fucking stick it to all these bitches.
20 years old == years virgin
For the record, texting someone "I think I owe you an apology" doesn't make up for this shit.
I'm a 23 year old kissless virgin and even I know that’s how the game works. As soon as she is available that is the time to make a move. Heck some conventions also states you should have made a move even when she was with her boyfriend, hell for all you know that might have been what this new guy did, I don’t know. Though I commend you on your noble efforts to keep your hands clean that doesn’t always work to your favor you should have expected that much.
Don't turn into a bitter asshole over this. Nothing kills a girl-boner like a bitter asshole.
She texted me today to say that she did truly care for me but "it [her feelings, presumably] went nowhere."
Every time I open my heart it's rejected. I must have some glaring personality flaw (flaws?) that all the women I know have spotted but I fail to see.
I can't recall the last time I cried before now. forever alone.
There were red flags already showing at the beginning, where she seemed willing to do stuff with you while still keeping things going with her long distance boyfriend.
Yeah. I suppose I should have seen that, but she and I just got along so damn well. I don't really have a best friend and she was as close as I got in like 6 months or a year.
I'm feeling a bit better now.
I saw her and the new boy the other day. I had come to the study group because I figured I had the balls to see her and not get emotional or anything. He showed up which was fine, but when I saw the two of them walking away hand in hand, I actually felt a physical pang in my chest, like my heart or something seized up momentarily. I've never really felt that before, but I suppose it's not surprising considering this is the first time I've gotten this close to a female.
It was nice while it lasted... Now I go back to my life of nothingness.
I think I understand how you feel, something very similar happened to me as well. I was all but dating a girl for around a month; flirting, cuddling, and kissing. At the same time, she was "going out" with a guy she was getting really annoyed with, so she didn't feel bad about flirting with me. I didn't take the valiant route and confront her about it, instead I listened to her complain about her boyfriend and bash him as well, in hopes of making her simply dump him so she could be mine.
But she never was, because even after we were so intimate I never felt that pull, that feeling I can't describe that makes you really like a girl. And so I eventually stopped showing interest in her just when it started getting real, I pushed her away for some reason and stopped any attempt she made at making things work.
Now she's dating my best friend, and she is now my best friend as well. Moral of the story, sometimes people enjoy being around another and feel romantic feelings, but sometimes they are simply urges and nothing more. If you like being around this person, there's nothing wrong with continuing to be friends with her and her boyfriend -- maybe he's a cool guy.
Another thought, perhaps if things don't work out between them, you'll be right there to take his shoes.
Yeah. I would have liked for my feelings to slowly fade. This abrupt cessation has caused me a lot of emotional pain.
At this point I don't really want to date her though. Between thrashing my heart and being so capricious with relationships, I can't trust her again.
I just hope I can someday again trust someone with my heart.
I saw a counselor at the university today. I had set up this appointment before all of this romantic stuff happened. I always feel generally unhappy and dissatisfied with life. I think part of why I fell so hard from this situation was because I had placed so much hope for a less dull future in this girl.
Anyway. They referred me to a local therapist for talk therapy sessions. Maybe I can finally become happy enough that I don't fall so hopelessly and desperately in love with girls who don't really care. :)
get rich first and those bitches will be a magnet that you can't get rid of
Look at the bright side. After all these relationships, you're still a virgin, rather than a jailed rapist.
Life's good, man!
STDs don't cost money, and masturbation is free. Sex is Sex; and should never cost a dime. Every city has a (male/or/female)prostitue, if you wanna buy some--b-o-d-y ...for a minute. Save your money for a weekend-vaction to Hawaii & get laid over there. Home-town relationships can happen if the other person is a mature & understanding Human Being 1st, and a (non-game playing, non-manipulative, non-needy) relationship-partner 2nd. Be self-sufficient. Find a relationship partner that is self-sufficient. Cherish the addictive words: "i WANT you" and "i am Thankful for you". ~.~ Runaway-from (and Leave) the codependent words: "i NEED you" and "without you my life sucks" - because those lies create suffering & a superficial reality.