I cant find a Girlfriend (15)

1 Name: Anoymous : 2011-10-18 20:13 ID:SsVezTdg

Hi there. Im a 15-year old male. Im tall, and a little thin. I dont wear glasses or braces, and i dont consider myself ugly either.`

I am the tipical person who stays always at home - I dont usually go out.

When my friends ask me to go out to this "Botellon" (where we go somewhere and drink ...) - Well, i have never done it before, and i get nervous and say no. By doing this, i have lost many, many friends. And just stay at home - Reducing my chances of finding a girlfriend, One of my dreams ....

Im desperate to get friends and a girlfriend. and GET A LIFE, not just sitting at home saying that playing PS3 all day makes me happy, ... But what id really love is to have lots of friends and a gf.

But im just to scared to go out to parties and that with mates ...and that is one of my biggest dreams ....

I just make people think that i prefer sitting at home playing ps3. But in the inside, i want friends, and i want a gf. I want to get a DARN LIFE.

What do i do? Any advice?

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-10-18 20:42 ID:W7jrZSQR

You first get a life, then you get a girlfriend. Suddenly having a girlfriend would not stop you from staying stuck at home, and that would bore the hell out of your girlfriend, making your relationship very short lived.

Your real problem is that you fail to find people that you can socialize with, in a way that is meaningful to you. If meeting people scares you, you must then find a strong reason to counterbalance that fear. The best reason is to meet people that share common interests with you. So check what are your current interests, or interests that you would like to develop, and meet people you can share them with. A girlfriend will then come more naturally. But remember: no life, no gf.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-10-19 10:54 ID:iEZ/tLdA

15 years old? You don't need one.

4 Name: 映画男 : 2011-10-21 17:02 ID:mQjhlHUx

i didnt get my first girlfriend till i was 20, call me late bloomer but 15 your still young! wait for the right one :D

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-10-24 07:43 ID:Kh9JUyWL

You're losing time, kid. If you ain't fucked by 16 then you already lost.

6 Post deleted.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-10-25 04:37 ID:rrBaLZgJ

Make yourself a decent social life. Don't even think about getting a girlfriend until then. It's pretty pathetic when your only friend is your girlfriend, and she'll pick up on that pretty quickly. It's a big turn-off.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-11-14 01:32 ID:5E3SG4kp

shut up you fucking loser

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-11-14 03:24 ID:Heaven

>>8
What a constructive post!

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-11-14 14:28 ID:mB+/i6DS

to OP - Dont worry about it, you're still 15... I spent most of my youth playing video games, even though I looked better then most of the douches who were allways hanging around girls. Just wait a couple of years, things will come naturally just dont rush it. Be yourself find people who like you for who you really are and dont try and pretend to be someone else.
Real life starts after high school and people will notice you for the person you are.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2011-12-11 00:05 ID:oCbWAfrL

I think you need a lesson of how to "Spark".
Concentrate your mind, Mutter the spell to Mini-Hakkero tenderly,
Aim at someone you don't like, now unleash your annihilation of love!

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2012-01-06 08:55 ID:wGAfIjIi

what you need to do kid is invest on building your muscles so by the time you hit 17 or 18 you'll become a total hunk and no chick will resist you. the sooner you do so the sooner chicks will be drooling over you.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2012-06-06 23:20 ID:Nvy+rdg4

I'm in this exact situation.
Except I'm 27. And I don't have people inviting me out to go drinking all the time.

I don't have any social life. When I was in college and right after I graduated I tried a few times joining clubs or going to club gatherings, but they were never worth the effort. They weren't all that enjoyable, and none of the people there ever felt worth my time.

I don't have any particular need or desire for a social life, but I do desire companionship. I feel like a girlfriend is all I really need.
Of course I'm not trying to say that I need a girlfriend to be happy. I'm satisfied with many aspects of my life. But in terms of friendship, I feel like just having one person, a romantic partner, is all I need to satisfy me.

Of course meeting people is next to impossible. I've been on probably 3 or 4 dates in the past 6 years.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2012-06-11 13:32 ID:u7tB9lcb

Don't rush. You won't enjoy having a relationship with someone just for the reason you wanted to have a girlfriend. Wait for it.

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2012-06-11 16:37 ID:AE6PgPW8

OP - being with someone close and having an active social life are two different things. if you think about it, being in a relationship can mean that you still stay at home...just have one additional person to share it with. that can work in some ways...but eventually it will grow out for either you or your partner.

now...being afraid of going out to clubs, bars, social events...being around people in general...means that you have NO CONFIDENCE in yourself as a person. My boss once told me over the phone that I put too much on myself to be perfect or be the best person out there. you have to understand that even high-class celebs don't always stand out perfectly. the satisfaction of being out in the world varies from person to person. one may not have to go to a bar or concert to have fun with others. it can also be through sports, internet cafes, nature hikes, travelling the world, etc. once you find your niche, either a) you will slowly find people to interact because they share the same interest, or b) they will find you because of your abilities and interests. Example: gf of almost 8 years would not be going out with me initially cause I was a jock and a jerk at school. But when we have to group up for a class exercise one time, I told her I played the violin. That spark of interest eventually became a long line of memorable experiences.

So...1st thing is to be happy about yourself. Get out of the house and do some things that could interest you. remember that experimentation is better than striking success on your first try. Once you gain confidence, then we'll talk about a gf.

>>13: those people were probably those that didn't share the same interest with you...or you weren't intrigued. All I can say is keep trying. As for companionship...it would be nice first...but if she changes interests often in the long run (while you stay the same stuck at home), she'll eventually lose interest and break up with you. Realize this: you may be contempt with your life presently, but learn to evolve it...or at least adjust when being with another person.

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