>>28
Suicide is a misdirected attempt to change one's life situation.
Regardless of what it feels like, you are NEVER caught in the situation you are in. There are always thousands and millions of options (some may feel a bit drastic).

You need to identify what you dislike about your current situation, and how you wish it were different. What is it that you seek?
We'll try to help, as long as you keep enabling us to do so. GL, and please respond.

Also: If you do, bloody stop seeing everything bad that happens to you as a confirmation of your misdirected world view.