I am pretty much an outcast at my school. I don't dress, act, or talk differently, but for some reason, I am incredibly shy around everyone that I don't know VERY VERY well. Even with my friends at school, I just kind of hang in the back, and don't talk much. Look at my thread in the Love+Romance section for yet another example of this. I'm starting to think this is a very serious problem. I dont talk to anyone at parties, I barely meet any new people, and the people I do know, I can't talk too. I am too shy to describe here. Advice? ('v')?
well mon, if ur liek me then u'll probably have to live with it
u can try to force urself to be more social but this comes mostly with experience, it requires a certain change of attitude and expectations
no matter what happens, don't isolate urself, keep going out even if u don't liek partying anymore or ur bored.
if u go into isolation mode then ur fucked mon believe me and eveeryaday youll be more fucked till u want to cut ur balls off, just liek me, u see
shyness is great--you end up not saying or doing something stupid
If you're worried that real life is just like high school...IT IS! Well, actually, it only is if you continue to hang around with the same losers as you did in high school, which you have no worries there!
1) It's only four years, suck it up!
2) Excel in your studies and you will be rewarded with degrees, cash, and endless pussy! (pussy quality varies with degrees and cash)
3) After you get into a serious relationship with that "one special person" (girlfriend) pretty soon, having friends doesn't really feckin' matter all that much!
Hope those life tips help!
>>4
I directly advice against your #3.
It's highly unhealthy to only have your girlfriend as friend. She should be one of your best buds without doubt, hopefully your best one, but never the sole friend. That will lead to a lot of frustration and annoyance. The same applies to the chick. She should feel that you're one of her best friends, of not the best, but you bloody need to encourage her to have friends beyond yourself.
if anyone cares, my other thread is in the Love & Romance section under "Love is hard".
#5 You are correct. I was just thinking way ahead of myself, as in when you are married and have kids and work a full time job. Yes, you can still have good friends, but by the time you have all this other shit in your life you want your spouse to be your best bud of all time.
When I got over my shyness I realized that one of my problems was that I was too afraid of what other people thought of me. I was afraid that if I said one little thing wrong everyone would hate me forever. As long as you don't hang out or talk with conceited assholes, thats definatley not the case. The easiest way to stop caring about what other people think of you is to realize how little they think of you.
One of my other problems was that I didn't know what to talk about. I was a real internet addict and I spent all of my time on that, so I couldn't really partake in discussions about movies or tv shows or other things like that, even when I wanted to. Try to get into other things than the internet, if that problem applies to you.
Other than that, I just forced myself to talk a little at a time, and gradually got better. It was a social fear and one of the best ways to overcome a fear is to slowly expose yourself to it so you eventually realize it's not all that bad.
If you're really serious about overcoming your shyness, ask your parents if you can see a psychologist or therapist, because they can help with more than you may think. I used to go to therapy for other issues and he offered to help me overcome my extreme shyness, but I ignored him because I was an immature 15 year old who didn't want any help from adults. So I ended up learning the hard way.
I think this is the reason I became a hiki. Because I thoght too much about what others thpught of me.
shy-kun, please don't become the same as me.
whats a hiki...?