How can i help my girlfriend accept her own body. (8)

1 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-23 18:11 ID:UiK/evHq

My girlfriend hates herself because she thinks shes fat. She says that she'd rather be anorexic and dying than how she is now (At the moment shes.. shes a bigger girl but i wouldnt call her fat. shes well proportioned. She doesnt have fat hanging from her arms or over her jeans). Its really REALLY getting her down and i hate to see her upset. She cuts herself sometimes (only scratches though nothing bad bad, its mainly the fact that she does it).

I've been through afew problems myself and have some scars to show for it but now i understand that in order to be happy with yourself in general you have to have a forfilling life. Im somewhat happy with me because i know this.

I complement her all the time and always tell her how much i love her and how beautiful her body is (i go into detail about different parts). At times shes said 'Noones ever said that before' and simular things.

I've tried explaining and helping my girlfriend but it doesnt seem to be working. Could anyone please give me some advice before she does anything 'silly'..
How can i encourage her to accept her body adn to be happy.

2 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-24 01:29 ID:iAKwcmw4

if she's up for it, you could try helping her get therapy. i know that a lot of people might cringe at the thought (if you do, or she does, i understand.) it's an idea tho'.
you could start on an exercise regime and invite her to join you. she will probably lose water-weight quickly (the excess water in fat that burns off quickly with exercise) so it might be a confidence booster that could put her on a healthier road to losing the weight she doesn't like. if she has problems with hurting herself, she might be able to redirect her frustration into physical activity.
you could try taking her places and giving her lots of attention (in response to a similar problem someone before mentioned taking pictures of the girl at the park) something to prove to her that you love her and do think she is attractive.

ultimately, it may be difficult and even embarrassing for you, but if you love her, it will be worth it.

3 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-24 04:23 ID:PWBMDmPY

I agree with what >>2 says about an exercise regime. It would help with her confidence and working out hard can help with cutting.

Many girls are unhappy with themselves and all the sweet words in the world are not enough, although it is nice to hear them sometimes. The feeling of beauty comes from one's self and if a girl relies on the words of others to make her feel this way it is only a temporary feeling. This is something she will have to work on by herself, but your support will help her. Showing her how you feel she is beautiful will help her more than telling her.

4 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-24 06:02 ID:UiK/evHq

So how can i show her that i know she is beautiful? Seriously i havnt a clue.. My 'not having a clue' could be interpreted as not caring enuth, could it not? She means the world to me, im just not very godo at ideas :(

Another problem is its a long distance relationship. I would LOVE to do the fittness regime though, maybe we could still do it and tell eachother of our prgress.

Thanks for the replies :)

5 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-24 09:09 ID:iAKwcmw4

if it is long distance you might do well to make a point of physically seeing her as much as possible. i too am in a long distance relationship (and although we talk for hours every night) we make a point of physically being together at the very least every 2 weeks.
you might want to take her to the park and take pictures (of her. be obvious) or go dancing (sounds old-fashioned, but she could dress up. if you don't know how lessons rock too) or go swimming at the beach (encourage her to wear a nice bathing suit and get her to take off clothes covering it. tell her that you want to see her body) and whatever else she wants to do.
you know that she is beautiful. what she needs from you is to show her that she is. we all need people to tell us that we are attractive occasionally, and she needs you to tell her now.
your love will lead the way. have faith.

6 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-27 16:04 ID:HGHP6nWX

You have to make sure she stops caring how anyone else or the rest of the status quo may think of her. The only person whose consideration of her should matter to her is yours, and of course herself. Obviously you have no problem with how she is and probably prefer it to being around a piece of straw, you have to make sure she realizes how you feel about it because it could be that she thinks it isn't what you want and my bet is that she would be very very wrong about that, so until she realizes this she'll only get worse.

I guess technically she just really wants to be a toothpick becaaaaaause...uh, well until you figure that out there isn't much of a way to figure out how to deal with it, but to want such a thing is pretty senseless, she probably just needs to be reaffirmed in herself, which again places the responsibility solely in your court so perhaps try that before you inquire as to why she obsesses with being thin.

7 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-27 16:43 ID:AJ47ERzc

tell her to work out.. tell her to stop complaining and do something about it.. you're not just gonna wake up and be skinny all of a suddent

8 Name: Anonymous : 2007-02-27 16:43 ID:AJ47ERzc

tell her to work out.. tell her to stop complaining and do something about it.. you're not just gonna wake up and be skinny all of a suddent

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