my life has no meaning? (29)

1 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-07 07:04 ID:dH+1yhZ9

hi all. i am a 20 year old male in college. i have been obsessed with the japanese culture since i was in elementary school, i even taught myself japanese by going to various sites online. i dream of going to japan one day and meeting new people, hopefully even a pretty girlfriend that won't laugh at me as soon as i say i like anime.

but lately, i feel like my life has no purpose. of the few japanese girls that i know from school, none shows any interest in me. i would converse to them in japanese, making them feel welcome and thus continue to talk to me, but they would just laugh and answered me in english. i know my japanese isn't the greatest, but i am making the effort.

and it just makes me wonder if all these years i have been wasting my time in japanese. of course i love the culture, but maybe the dream of me going to japan and meeting girls (or just friends in generally) just a big dream? because they just don't think we can be friends because i'm too otaku?

2 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-07 16:23 ID:5Detup3G

hmmmm... well, otakuness aside,

In Japan, most of the schoolgirls CAN'T speak English. That's a bonus for fulfilling your dream.

I've had similar interests, although I haven't studied Japanese much and only know a few words.

You're in college, eh? I've been tempted to do something crazy and somehow transfer to a Japanese school. Those schools are desperate for students, they'll take foreign students happily, and you can even get permission to work part-time while you're a student there.


3 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-07 17:27 ID:Heaven

If you want to go as far as Japan in order to find a girlfriend that won't laugh you off, you're clearly looking in wrong places. There is nothing wrong with otakuness, liking anime and Japanese culture; as long as it doesn't become an obsession that makes you blind to your surroundings.

4 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-07 17:54 ID:5Detup3G


That's true, too.

5 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-07 20:04 ID:jIMrtf0h

Life has the meaning you give it.

6 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-07 22:09 ID:Heaven


oooo! A fortune cookie!

7 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-07 22:29 ID:dH+1yhZ9

I am the original poster.
>>3 I don't think i am looking in wrong places in trying to find a girlfriend in Japan. I have dreams, and until recently, I feel that it is a very good dream.

8 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-08 04:40 ID:jIMrtf0h

>>6 It's true though, your life is as much as you make out of it. If you want to move to another country, work your ways around it, stuff like that.

9 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-08 06:48 ID:Heaven

All that seems very hollow, and it's no surprise that your feel your life is meaningless. Japan is not a life goal, it's a country like any other.
Going to Japan wont accomplish anything, and could make you feel disillusioned. Just like the Japanese that visit Paris, France and suffer from tremendous culture shock when filthy streets and rude Parisians shatter their romantic preconceptions.

I'd recommend trying a new dream, concentrate on building a life in your country of birth
If your Japanese is good, you could get a job as a translator or teacher.

10 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-08 13:38 ID:0RSoLWGB

The stores are amazing, and if you have friends over there already then you can meet some great people. But it isn't the holy land. Those people can be met anywhere, you can buy all that stuff through online stores and agents, and the Japanese girls who leave their country are 10 times better at English than the ones over there.

The only things I really miss about Japan are that you don't have to look too far to find a vending machine, and that convenience stores are not actually expensive.

11 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-08 22:36 ID:5Detup3G

I think if he's really into Japan, he'll know enough about it to know that it's not a paradise. It has it's ugliness and also it's great, intangible beauties. He might even be able to appreciate it more because of the ugliness.

When you're that into something to love it for its flaws, you might as well marry it, it's really the only thing you can do.

12 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-09 05:11 ID:6tfsc0GF

First off, I am going to take a wild guess and say that you aren't interested in Japanese culture, you are interested in anime and manga. 99% of the people who say that the like Japan for culture are either closet otakus or just want to be different from all of the other otakus.

I'll do you a favor and answer you in both sides of the spectrum. I'm sure both will help you though.

First off, let me say this. Otaku means nerd in Japan. Since we are speaking in English, I will use the term nerd from now on. It may seem harsh, but it is true in Japan, and it is true in America. You are an anime/manga/fig/whatever nerd. You enjoy all of that, and that's great to know. So do I (just finished torrenting Lucky Star 13 =D)!

I'd like to say that some Japanese like America just as much as the other way around. There ARE Japanese women who want to marry an American just because they like American men/culture/etc. Congratulations! This isn't the point though.

Like >>9 said about Paris, Japan is not going to be the holy land. To be honest, even I sometimes think that it will be a nerd's paradise. The truth is, it is just like any other place- crime, dirtiness, etc. Unless you plan on living under a bridge in Akihabara, you probably won't be exposed to all of the 'JaPaNesE WaCkInEsS' as much as you would like. Yes, you will see more anime/manga in general, but not everywhere at once.

Remember what I said earlier, an otaku is just a nerd. If you ever got bullied/pestered/etc. in school/work/etc. for openly loving anime, chances are you will be in Japan too (an exception is that manga isn't too looked down upon, but anime is considered for kids/nerds).

My tip: Don't run around saying that you are in LOVEEEE with all of that. You can love it, and if someone says something about it, you CAN talk about it, but it is just a hobby like anything else and you don't need to waste other's time with your banter. Living in Japan would be fine, but just remember all of this. If you would like, I could find a few articles on all of this, but other than that, this is just a summary.

Go to Japan and thourghly immerse yourself in Japanese culture, become a citizen, marry, get a low-medium paying job (like in America, you actually have to work for money!), etc.

Also, don't go up to the Japanese girls and try to talk about anime. Like I said, don't bring it up unless it is relevant to the conversation.

Hands are tired. Any questions?

13 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-09 06:23 ID:xkC/KG1r

OP comes off sounding wapanese.

However since you're in college, study abroad in Japan for a year. Then once you're there actually research what it means to live there, if you're wholly serious. I studied abroad there myself in college because I had similar interests (video games in my case), but ultimately what I learned was everything that >>12 summarizes:

Japan isn't a holy land with weird technological marvels where everyone knows and loves anime. Most of the college students I met didn't watch anime or read manga. They were typical college students, studying to make the grade with some extra cirricular activities that they enjoy, not too different from America. Most of them don't have time to play video games, in fact, I don't think I met anyone with a console. I think I met a few people with Nintendo DSes that they used to play stuff like Sudoku.

If you're interested in meeting people with similar interests, I think that you're best hope would actually be to stay in America and find other japanophiles/wapanese. If you want a girl that understands your anime hobby, you should go to things like Otacon, PAX, or like conventions in America to start meeting them. Trust me, you will find more friends and more girls with common interests going to those places than you would dumping yourself in Japan in the short term.

I also have a Japanese girlfriend (I met her on my study abroad), and can tell you that sustaining a long distance relationship to Japan is difficult. The plane tickets that we (her and I) buy in a year alone is about $2000-$3000, and that's not including dates, trips, and other things we do together. It requires a lot more budgeting than having a girlfriend in America I think. Trusting the other person is much harder when they are a good 5000 miles away as well. Is she that much ore different than girls I've met and dated in America? No, not really. Does she like anime, video games, or manga? No, not really. Do we love each other? Yes, very much. We have issues communicating, but as I'm semi-fluent in Japanese and am studying everyday to get better; the same with her and English, we're overcoming that hurdle slowly but surely. Just like American girls, Japanese girls will like you more if you can speak the language.

If you're interested in "work in Japan for foreigners," the outlook for me seemed pretty bleak. From what I saw, it seemed that (like >>12 mentions) the only jobs for foreigners are probably low-medium paying jobs like English tutor or teacher (JET/NOVA programs if you're so inclined). If you're a computer programmer, you might be able to find something at Microsoft or one of the other worldwide software giants and then transfer to a Japanese branch.

Take the above with a grain of salt, after all it's just my experience with the land of the rising sun and shouldn't be taken as anything other than that.

14 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-09 14:36 ID:Heaven


15 Name: Anonymous : 2007-07-10 00:54 ID:6tfsc0GF

Good to know the articles I read were right!

To be honest, the only reasons I would live in Japan is because anime and manga would be easier to get and I would get the released games faster. I do find the actual culture interesting, but in reality, I would just go there for my hobbies.

Anyways, >>1 , if you have any more questions please ask.


16 Name: ViolentAJ : 2007-10-26 11:09 ID:HwKIQatb

Japanese girls are easy. You must be either a total fuckin' loser or Black. Japanese girls like any race except for Black men.

17 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-26 20:29 ID:vJwMw5HO

Make a trip to Japan. That will help build yourself,...

Either you decide you like it and you will really do something to move there. Or you decide it's nice, but now you need something else to build your life.

In any case, you will have made something out of your passion, and will be ready to move forward with your life.

You feel shitty because you are stuck.

18 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-29 21:02 ID:HRqjit39

He's right, go and see how that works out.

19 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-30 02:51 ID:f9VI5BGE

If you go to Japan and then feel disillusioned, then that's kind of good. It will allow you to get over the obsession, and ultimately start focusing on other things, and perhaps more productive goals. Such as perhaps, the goal of owning something really expensive, like a house.

Me, I went to Japan and didn't get disillusioned, I love it. On the other hand I know full well how shitty working life is over there, and Tokyo dwellers are constantly telling me how much life sucks in Tokyo even though it looks great to an outsider. So I had no such goals to live there in the first place. Yes, I know Japan is not all Tokyo, but Tokyo is the city I love the most so I'm only picking on it as an example.

Also, Japanese girls aren't all in Japan. I'm sure there are plenty to be met wherever you happen to be.

20 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-30 03:51 ID:U5S89XWA

>>16 fuck you loser how do you know what who japanese people like?
everyone is different some japanese like black men, some not, some not care.

you racist disillusional moron learn about people, not talk for them, your not the people, your one person. fucking racist retard

21 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-30 08:12 ID:Heaven


don't feed the troll

22 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-30 23:52 ID:lXyYMF5l

>>21 what does that mean

23 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-31 03:40 ID:ngtNxtpq

It means >>16 was made just to ellicit a response, to start an argument. "Feeding a troll" means complying to this, by arguing with what the troll stated, thus fuelling the fire.

24 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-31 03:42 ID:a9ZITdBB

You say your life has no meaning just because knowing japanese hasn't gotten you anywhere much with the japanese girls at your school, and you're doubting it will do so in japan?
If so, you're placing far too much importance on japan, going to japan, making japanese friends etc.
I understand you've been fascinated by it since elementary school, and it certainly is a nice dream probably many of us share,but it shouldn't be playing such a big role in your happiness.
It's great to know japanese, I'm sure it will end up benefitting you in life. Keep at it, there are plenty of jobs out there that could make use of that skill.
My advice is don't give up, but get over it a little; there should be many things/dreams/etc more important to you than this which give your life meaning.

25 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-31 06:55 ID:67K0LSXL

way to crush my hopes and dreams, anon :(

Though, it's probably true.

way to crush my hopes and dreams, the rest of you black people. :(

26 Name: nanashi774 : 2007-11-02 05:56 ID:sHni2/+E

for one, it's awesome that you taught yourself japanese. i taught myself most of what i know, too. yeah, i think you should try going to japan. you might have to do some looking, but you'll eventually find a nice otaku girl to love you.

27 Name: ViolentAJ : 2008-08-22 22:58 ID:xNNjmFwm

What, it's true! Everyone knows that japanese pretty much accept all races except for Blacks.

28 Name: Anonymous : 2008-08-23 00:42 ID:7ZnW3WfS

>japanese pretty much accept all races

That's refreshing to hear....

>except for Blacks

You can put Koreans and Chines also I believe...

29 Name: Anonymous : 2008-08-23 10:04 ID:c26IayXC

>except for Blacks

Whites and Hispanics too.

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