I seem to have an issue with contact with other people. I haven't gone through any traumatic experiences, or anything like that.
I've got a few female friends, and recently a couple of them became on the verge of a little more than friends with me or rather they tried to. It was perhaps the most embarassing and shaming thing that could happen to me when someone tries to kiss you and you flinch like they were hurting you. I don't hate them, I rather like them a lot. But I just can't avoid this?
I've got male and female friends (i'm a male) and it doesn't matter their gender, if they smack me on the back, put a hand on my shoulder, or pat my hip (just examples) I'll flinch. It's sometimes bad, sometimes only minor, but it's really noticable to everyone and sometimes I get wierd looks from the friends in question.
Is there some sort of name for my condition or something? I don't hate physical contact, but it's affected me a fair bit now that some of my friends have picked up on it.
Handshakes are fine, so are hugs (just friendly hello ones). My dad or mum could put a hand on my shoulder and I'd be fine, I just don't seem to like physical contact with other people for some reason.
>>1Is there some sort of name for my condition or something?
yes, its called "you're a pussy"
>>1
Either you did have traumatic experiences/bad associations, or you might be autistic etc. These things do not pop out of nowhere.
>>1 I acted the same way, after having no human contact for three years. Just get a female friend that you can be physical with, but not in a sexual way. For example, a friendly lesbian who will hold your hand and curl up with you when you watch a movie.
It only takes a few months to get over this, if you have someone around to help you.
well, I guess you'll get over this but it's going to be a long process if that's the case. I also have this male friend who is similar to you though his problem is limited to girls. he just flinches and really shows us that he doesn't want any contact with you.
but there was an improvement to him. he doesn't flinch as much as he used to and he settles for pats on the back or when he place a hand on his arm for a while, it's ok for him and doesn't over react anymore. it happened because he really tried to make an effort to it even though he looked like he was trembling or something. he had some help with us female friends but it really took a while for him to be comfortable.
these things don't have to be rushed. take the easiest steps that you can work with until you are able to handle a much bigger degree of physical contact.
Same problem here,... It helps to explain what's going on to others, so that they don't think you are disgusted by them. Otherwise just take your time to get used to physical contact.
I'll join the club too. Though I'm a girl, and by all sterotypical instances and reports, I should like to hug my friends and poke others, I really don't like people touching me, even it's just to poke me, or to play with my hair...
It's never been anything as forward as 1's experiences though. (I'd probably faint out of stress if one of my male friends tried something like that on me >_>)
Hopefully, everyone's advice will help me too...