How do you get people to laugh, and to smile?
I want to get to a point where people want to invite me to whatever, since it's just cool for me to be around. Now, I'm not aiming for HOLY shit stand up comedian funny, but just someone that people like to be around.
I hate it when I try to talk to people, and then there just like..."yeah...that's great...awesome." with no emotion what so ever. I guess I should say it now, that I'm not that good looking of a person. But I've seen many, awesome people that don't look that great, but people gravitate to them like magnets.
Any suggestions?
For starters, don't try too hard. It sort of puts people off.
From experience, people like the ones you mentioned do it by just being themselves. I know it's cliche but you wont be able to be relaxed and enjoy other peoples company if you're pretending.
You don't have to be funny, for people to like having you around.
Learn to listend to people, and react to what they are saying, everybody likes to speak about themselves. Also, find people who share your interests, so that you can talk about things you like. Do fun things with them, and your mood will lighten up.
The trick to making people laugh is to have characters that you slip into when you say something funny. You could go really camp, or you could be completely deadpan or sarcastic. Watch good stand-up comedians and try and get an idea of the essence of the character(s) they are being. You don't need to limit yourself to just one character, take bits from each style and make it your own.
>>4 again
forgot to say, it needs to be natural so it can take a lot of work developing these characters in your head and practicing using them in real life. I find that theres always conversations going through my head and I think of funny things to say - bit of a blessing and a curse because it makes it hard to clear my head.
Also, you have to kind of define yourself as a person, first for yourself and afterwards for other people.
In the past I was also only funny for the nerd circle that I hung out with, then I kind of switched my clique, took this and that joke and started to getting an idea in my head what would truly is considered funny and what not and then BAM - I had an individual style that many people like.
Though, to be fair, there are people who aren't necessary funny but who are simply kind of nice to hang around with. Thing is, don't bet on this card all the time.
>>4 here once again
Just remembered something, apparently people who have older siblings are more likely to be able to get people to laugh than an only/eldest child. Not sure how factual that is.
Opposite for me, I'm the elder sibling and I have the ability to make people spit out their coffee (in a good way.)
>>9 is an individual example and an exception.(read: Doesn't make the rule false) Is the youngest siblings also capable of this or something similar?
>>7 applies to me.
Quotes aside, most of the advice of being "funny" is very true. Whenever I make people laugh, it's usually when I'm in some "character." Typically, when the subject is something that's meant to be taken seriously, I become loud, rambunctious, and sarcastic.
Though if a subject is meant to be playful, I'm usually deadpan and/or defeated.
And I have other characters I can't really recall right now. Sometimes I just fluctuate rapidly between characters.
Knowing a few jokes helps too. While they may not be good for breaking the ice, when you're in a group and everybody grows silent, you can always start telling them.
Above all else though, have tact. Know when what you're doing is appropriate. If you're in a situation where being funny isn't appropriate, do NOT try to be funny.
I've pissed off a lot of people that way.
> Above all else though, have tact. Know when what you're doing is appropriate.
Seconded, this is very important.
It might be funny when Peter Griffin grabs the Sexual Harassment Instructor's breast and says 'honk honk', but this really doesn't translate well to almost any situation in everyday life.
Hopefully this is obvious to just about everyone.
How to be NOT funny:
http://4-ch.net/personal/kareha.pl/1193599968/39
Random tips:
As stated above, you want to have a couple of different "goofy caricatures" (i dunno I'd go so far as to call them characters) when telling a joke. When telling a joke you want to be relaxed and natural while giving somewhat of a performance. People don't like to be sat down and have a joke forced down their throats with no flair or acting ability. Make sense? Assume charismatic speech patterns and bodty language.
Also, if you think you're able to realistically judge your sense of humor, remember to joke about things you think are funny. You can't be funny when you don't think it's funny. It plays back into having a sort of "persona" or goofy affect that you adopt to tell a certain sort of joke. You want to seem emotionally sincere in whatever sort of joke you're telling (whether that be lighthearted and frivolous, or sarcastic, dark humor).
Also, some of this is just natural. Some people don't have very good joke-telling abilities, or are unable to goof around naturalistically as well. Everyone has some sense of humor, but don't stretch your credibility. The more actually funny things you pull off, the funnier anything else you may try doing will be as well. Funny people seem funny.
This is the first time I've written any of this down, after 30 years of being a continual clown. I don't know if any of it makes sense, just trying to vocalize my instinct.
SOME people seem to think I'm really funny but most don't. lol
It depends whether our personality connects or not.
I personally don't find myself funny at all but my teacher told
me i was very funny so i must be. right?? but im not.
I cant think of anything to say if I'm alone with someone and get nervous but when I'm with a group of people I can say alot of stuff. like I make jokes in class alot. black people seem to laugh at my jokes but not chinese guys.
I'm a very funny guy. In fact I had people pee themselves over my humor. You can't "do something to be funny" it's a feeling you communicate nonverbally. Online (text) I'm just another guy, but in realtime, when I'm in a great mood, I got a way to lift people out of their moods and make them feel damn good. Its not the punning or the wordplay, somehow I'm sometimes in such a good mood that it's contagious, people get swept up with it and hilarity ensues.
This isn't helpful I know. If I have to give you a tip I'd say you shouldn't focus on being funny, but cultivate the good feeling inside. When that's strong enough, and people are open to it, it takes just a little to get them going.