i can't remember a time in my life that i wasn't "the weird guy". not like a nerd or anything, i am in good shape, and manage to seem like all the others around me do. But people are always calling attention to the fact that i behave in abnormal ways. More than once friends or acquaintances have joked that i would be the most likely to shoot up a highschool or college.
i tried a lot of things to pass a more normal vibe, but nothing seems to work. i smile and greet people i know. i dress normaly (the colors are a bit on the darker side, but never black, i use mostly dark green, or blue). i am kind of reserved, but i try to talk nicely to anyone that aproacches me. the only real 'weird' thing i know i do is that i don't take notes in class and am usually doing something unrelated to that class.
tl;dr how do i stop making people weirded out by me?
By shooting them:)
Give up and just do what you want. I've been the "weird one" all my life, it's not that bad. Eventually you find some people who just don't care.
Wear brighter clothing? Just try it. I normally stick with darker more earthy tones, but brighter can help. It'll make you seem less... introvertive I think. Find some colors that sort of suit you. It doesn't hurt to ask friends too.
Especially with warmer weather rolling around. It can't hurt. At the least you'll seem like you have a better disposition (regardless of the reality). Becuase I think I'm sort of the way you are (sans the not taking notes part). And my friends (as far as I know) don't think I'll shoot up a place.
get a really close friend whom you can be honest with and ask him/her to point out all the weird shit you do. alot of time its subconscious gestures/body language type stuff that you can't control.
sometimes you don't even realise it. better to have a close friend tell you than have other people snigger at you about it behind your back.
i know how it feels...
Describe yourself like someones else is describing you. Physically and how you act. Let's get an idea, you were pretty vague in your post.
>>6
yeah, i'm sorry about that. ok, here we go:
i dress in jeans and tshirt, spend most of my time in college, where i study and work. in my free time i usually read a book out in the campus or surf the internets in one of the computers from my workplace or class. mostly i only speak when spoken to, but i talk to my coworkers to avoid the boredom of doing actual work. am usually sleeping, reading or drinking coffe in class, instead of paying attention (the only really weird thing i believe i do). i have few friends at college, but out of it i have a number of close friends i meet at the bar for drinks and talking.
physically i am average, i guess. kind of thin. i am pale, but that's because i don't like the beach and most outdoor activities. i make a note to myself to walk straight and never with my eyes down. i try to be polite, but can be "too honest", and my humour may seem a little dark sometimes.
that's about it i believe.
I don't think you should necessarily switch to bright colors, that may just draw attention.
I can't think of anything you mentioned being bad or whatever, but a lot of people in college are still basically high schoolers. If you don't quote Will Ferrell and shit, and are just a polite, kind of quiet person, they'll call you weird. Enjoy the good friends you have.
Well not an entire switch. Just incorporate them into your wardrobe a bit. Also move beyond just t-shirts. Mix things up a bit, because the way you present yourself will say alot.
>>get a really close friend whom you can be honest with and ask him/her to point out all the weird shit you do.
Because close friends totally grow on trees. I mean, all you have to do is reach up, grab one, and you're good to go. Like the motherfucking supermarket.
GTFO.
no need to fight, people. i have close friends. the problem is they they can't really give an impartial opinion. i'll try a slight change in wardrobe. maybe it'll work.
Have you ever seen a video tape of you just being yourself? The first time I did, I realized why many people I've never even talked to have considered me weird: I use unusual movements and facial expressions without even noticing it.
I've never really been in a position to have myself videotaped... Interesting experiment...
>>12
now that you mention it, have been videotaped once or twice. i remember that i was always with a look on my face like i am incredibly bored. when i talk i do it from the corner of my mouth, like when you are talking bad about someone and don't want them to hear it. also, when i smile i raise only one of the sides of my mouth, like i am mocking what was just said.
fuck, i think i nailed it.
Unless they're particulary odd and in dire need of correction (try and bring up to people close with you), I would argue that the videotape is more useful for becoming comfortable with how you look, sound, and act and to learn to work with it. For me, some of that stuff is a real self esteem booster. Becoming familiar with and appreciating your "outer" self and your "inner" self.
Afterall most people hate the way they sound to themselves and perhaps even the way they are on film. Becoming comfortable with that is key. That doesn't mean you can't improve it either.
Also, don't consciously be on film.
just be yourself, there is nothing to change, well if you are not doing anything bad, that is okay. .
well i think i am a little bit weird but not that really, you get that?