Hi All
I'm having a few issues with my personality lately. I can say I've got few but good friends, who really care about me.
The thing is that me and my friends argue a lot, mainly it's my fault...aparently because I whine about everything...If something isn't the way I want I whine, If I detect a lack of atention I whine, you know, the usual symptons of a spoiled girl.
My bestfriend said so. She's tired of the times I whine about anything and treat her bad.
But in my opinion my reasons are good enough. But aparently she's right, but I can't change can I? I've been trying to be more mature for my age (almost 20). The thing is, I think I lack myself a partner. My love life has been nule since I was born. I lack attention, but I'm not the type of girl who'll date a guy just for his attention and love and tenderness, I must love him too. But I've never been corresponded that way. Well, I have. 3 years ago. But somehow I hold it back and nothing happened. At the time, I think, I was too immature to share my intimacy with another person.
Or probably I wasn't sure of my feelings.
The real thing is, I'm afraid, that my life is empty. I have joys of course. But something's lacking.
My bestfriend is now dating agood friend of ours, and I sense all her attention is into him and vice-versa, and I feel so left out. I feel they're trying to ditch me so they can have their own life without me. And somehow I understand that, they're dating, I'm not included in all their plans.
And I know what you're thinking. Maybe I'm jeaulous. Yes, I am. Not that I love any of them romantically. I don't. But im jeaulous they're happy and I'll probably never achieve what they have.
Should I change, should I get more mature so I can finally attract the guy I'm into...I can't. Ive tried before growing up but I always come back to normal me. Normal Hiperactive me.
Sometimes I don't shut up and people begin to say I speak too much.
Of course those people dont matter. My friends dont mind my personality, but sometimes I exaggerate my actions and they have to point it out. Because I offended them in some way or I whined about nothing everytime....
I don't know what to do, I'm sick of being this me.
>all her attention is into him and vice-versa, and I feel so left out. I feel they're trying to ditch me so they can have their own life without me.
From what I've noticed, this seems to be the norm for people. The moment they get a S.O. suddenly everybody else becomes insignificant and tossed aside. This especially happens w/my female friends..one day they're flirting with me, the next they get a boyfriend and I never heard a peep out of them for months until they break up for whatever stupid reason.
About your problem, I wouldn't change yourself, especially if your end goal is to attract guys. That'll just attract someone to a facade of your true self and end up hurting both of you in the long run. Be happy with who you are, try to be more accepting of things the way they are, and you'll naturally start to complain less. Then again I don't know what you're complaining about, so maybe your complaints are valid. I wouldn't worry so much about finding a guy...if you're that desperate you can always try anonidate [I'm on there, but seems like most of the girls around here are underage b& or taken...wtf] or any of those other dating sites, but really, I wouldn't fixate on it if at all possible.
Thanks so much for the advice ^^
I feel the same way too, and I thought it was because I was bipolar (It runs in the family), but it could also mean that you need to start something new, that change might be good for you right now. Have you thought about volunteering?