My outside appearance must seem normal and healthy judging from the reactions I get when I claim depression. Yet, I am depressed. The other day, I asked myself what would happen if another person was somehow able to be me for just a short period of time. My response was that they would wonder if I had taken sleeping pills or some heavy dose of a sedative. Really, it's the feeling of being outside on an incredibly humid and hot day, hungry and bored. You become exhausted. It's as if someone notices your exhaustion and offers you valium or codeine in relief, and you take it. The state you would be is the state that I am in.
I've come to the conclusion that this is the body's response to stress and anxiety. My body must be trying to counteract the chaos that consumes my life. It does so with heavy doses of depressant chemicals. I also feel that just like any other mood altering drug, one can become addicted. An individual begins to pile on problems so that his body will prescribe more and more pain killers. My mind has become a mental hospital.
So, I need to move, need to get out, need to do something, although crawling on my knees. I need to see that I am at least putting up a fight. I need to believe that in the realm of the mind, I am Odysseus.
Any other tips?

It seems to me that your actual problem is apathy as a result of lack of motivation rather than depression.

>>2 hello mr. armchair-psychologist, just what have we got here? hmn..a case of apathy I see, we are glad a diagnosis has been made! This young man is surely on the road to recovery already, your powers truly are astounding!

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OP please see a doctor.

beimp

age