OP, what you have is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, (not to be confused with obsessive compulsive personality disorder, which is what "monk" has)
What happens is you have intrusive thoughts that are hostile in nature, and because you see them as horrible, you obsess over them and it makes you nervous. I do the exact same thing. The fact that you never have any desire to act upon these impulses are proof that they are just static and you shouldn't worry about them too much.