> Furthermore your definition of masculinity seems to imply that shy guys aren't masculine, that a guy being afraid to ask someone out or liking being chased themselves isn't manly

Homosexual men are more masculine than a man that's intimidated by a women (and also more desirable to the opposite sex). It doesn't mean he's not a man or not masculine, just that the man that takes the lead is more masculine than he.
Same reason feminists aren't feminine. Most men don't want to be castrated. We want a submissive women who wears a dress, cooks the steak we've provided, spreads her legs, and make us feel like men.
Yeah, yeah. Fuck me. I'm a terrible human being for playing fast and loose with the horrible truth that we're all cruel animals.

> And what else does masculinity contain in its paradigm?

If it'll keep your feelings from being hurt, we can say masculinity is the presence of male genitalia or a Y chromosome. But then FtM transsexuals are offended, and maybe those of us with a micropenis.

You want to be a winner? Cross the finish line first. That participant ribbon is crap and we all know it.