Hey, long story short, I'm never hungry, all food tastes bad, i have no friends = depressed, i have bad anxiety and wake up with cold sweat all the time. I hate sleeping because its so unpleasant to wake up in a bath of sweat, freezing cold. My parents don't care. They take me to half-wit psychiatrists that prescribe me low end SSRI anxiolytics that do nothing and refuse to cooperate with me. They tell me all the time that there is "food in the house" but can't seem to comprehend that I just don't feel hungry, and I can't help it. I'm not anorexic. All they do is make excuses and sigh heavily saying dramatically "i just don't know what to do! i don't know what to do!" and i'm trying to tell them exactly what to do. Send me to a motherfucking psychologist/psychiatrist/doctor. They won't cooperate with me. Everything I say to them is interpreted rudely. My mom knocked on my door and I said "what do you need" and she said "don't talk to me in that tone!" I don't know what to do. I have a very, very low affect and the only emotion i can think of to describe how i feel is just despair. Complete and utter despair. Im only 15 and I'm just simply not getting the help I need. My parents see me as a a problem, not that I HAVE a problem. They are narcissistic, intolerant and just don't understand.

I started smoking Marijuana at the beginning of my freshmen year in high school, which I am halfway through, and ever since I went from a 0% kid in school, to getting 100% in all my classes, with praises from my teachers. And I was fine. No more complaining, I could eat, I was making friends, no anxiety, slept well, good grades. But Marijuana has no realistic place in my future. My parents would never agree to getting me medical marijuana.

So I ask, what would you recommend, suicide, running away and ending up dying or...?