Should I forgive her? (14)

1 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-17 10:29 ID:auOvi5G0

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I used to like this girl, we'll call her E. I've liked her for a VERY long time, throughout the year we would hook up and do a lot of stuff with eachother,then eventually she'd go and get a new guy. eachtime i was heartbroken and when things didnt work out with the guy, i took her back.

Time for high school prom comes around, and I ask her to go to prom with me. she says yes, and we start dating for teh first time.this lasts a couple weeks then she wants to put a "pause" on our relationship because she was going to be really busy for two weeks and wanted to focus on school and her sports. afte rmuch argument about it, i eventually agree. stupid me. Two weeks goes by and I ask her about getting back together and she says she is running for a leadership position in a youth program outside of school, so i agree to wait another week til that is over. eventually the week goes by and I dont get a chance to talk to her at all about it.

I go to a frestival with soe friends, and i get stoned outa my mind there. I made a "promise" to E that i would quit smoking. I made the promise 2 months prior, and this was the first ime i smoked in 3 months. she was at the same festival (she rather went with her ex boyfriend and another guy than me. i invited her to come along), and started making out with some random dude. So, we're both taking the same bus home, and i sit near the middle with my crew and she goes into the back with hers. and she makes sure i'm looking and she starts making out with the dude again. she then texts me asking my why i broke the promise, and i told her i thought she was a bitch for that and that i didnt want to go to prom with her anymore. she then comes to the front of the bus and bitches me out in front of EVERYONE on the bus. we get home, we talk about it, we make up. of course, i was pansy and forgave her.
whole week goes by with us not really talking. by now i've kinda lost feelings for her and gained feelings for a nother girl. the event at the festival really effected me. So, sunday comes round and i tell E about this. she agree's with me. she then tells me that she's dating one of the guys she met at the festival since saturday and wasnt going to tell me til after prom. this pisses me off a lot, and i tell her prom is off, and i was going with the other girl. she gets mad and starts crying on how she wants to go to prom with me, and only me. how she's been looking forward to it all year, etc. just crying on and on. to sumarize the following events, she get's mad. tries to make me pay for her $500 dress, threatens to send some people after me, one of them actually encountered me, and now, a few weeks later she texts me saying how she misses me being her friend.
At first, i told her fuck no, i'm not going to be your friend. but now, i'm on the verge of forgiving her and accepting her friendship back. Though I can say it wont ever be more than that. plus, I always seem to forgive people. no matter what. most people dont take advantage of that, but i feel like she is...

plain question. forgive her. yes no and why

2 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-17 12:38 ID:yM47BwwT

I hope you didn't go to the prom with her.

Don't forgive her. She's a fucking nutcase and has double standards stamped across her forehead. Can you really be friends with someone who has no respect for you?

3 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-17 14:40 ID:ijEgLz4R

No forgiving, I don't really have a why per se except for: why the heck you would even consider it? Low self esteem? masochist? lack of anything approaching sense? Well whatever it is, please work on it.

4 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-17 17:35 ID:i3FblfAr

No. Why? This girl is a manipulative neurotic evil bitch. Fuck her, in the non-sexual sense. Remove her from your life completely. When she sends you a text, don't send anything back. Ignore her completely, find new friends that aren't like her, and avoid that shit in the future.

5 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-17 22:40 ID:SAowv1st

Like everyone else, I don't see the point in maintaining a relationship with her. You don't have to avoid her, but there's no need to waste more time on her. There are so many other people worth spending time with, why bother with her?

Don't worry, very soon she'll find another pet to play with, and forget about you.

6 Name: Ryuuchi : 2009-06-18 01:39 ID:0iG4dTJw

Yes. Forgive and forget her, my friend. No, don't be friends with her anymore. It'll make your life more complicated than before. If she is going to be a bitch like that then no.

7 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-18 03:16 ID:Ox89epkT

You should forgive, but that doesn't mean you should keep hanging around with her.
It's pretty much guaranteed that she'll do something like this again, so don't try to get back with her.

But even so, holding a grudge will never help anything. You should forgive - but also move on. Perhaps tell her that you'd like to part ways, I dunno.

Good luck.

8 Name: rhye : 2009-06-18 04:53 ID:3G+ivTSx

I really hope you didn't get back together with this girl, like most of the people here.

I mean, I understand "forgiveness is a good thing, turn the other cheek, etc" but I don't think you'd want to burden yourself with the gravity that'll come along with continuing a relationship with this girl.

9 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-18 05:14 ID:Heaven

This relationship doesn't sound heathy at all. I think it's a good idea to be friends but do you really want to date her and get hurt again? It's probably a good idea to not see her as much or else those old feelings might come back. There are definitely better women out there for you.

10 Name: op : 2009-06-18 08:26 ID:auOvi5G0

I didnt go to prom with her, i went with the girl i was interested in. that's kinda mellowed down into just a friendship.

and as for her, I decided to go with the "forgive and forget" aproach. I told her tha ti forgave her for it, but her and I could never be as close as we were before because it'll always be in the back of my mind. jus tbecause of that i dont think i'll ever be able to see her as more than a friend.

but just in case... any tips on helping me keep my feelings in check?

11 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-18 19:05 ID:yM47BwwT


> but just in case... any tips on helping me keep my feelings in check?

Here's one: Not forgiving her.

12 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-18 19:21 ID:DXj5U4X3

another one: get a girlfriend. Works great!

13 Name: Mu : 2009-06-21 23:23 ID:hM3hdify

I agree with >>11. Fuck her. People who say 'forgive and forget' just don't like to act. If she's not good for her, then let it go. You obviously don't have to make her life shitty, but ignoring her does NOT mean you forgive her.

Hey man, anger is a gift. You take it if you want it. I like to give it back. Just for the fun of it. But if it's too much trouble, then I's rather not give a damn.

14 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-22 15:59 ID:LfTafCvm

she's too nerdy. move on.

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