Social shit. (10)

1 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-25 23:32 ID:dLIfGsZL

So, I left high school when I was 15. I spent the next 7 years isolated from all friends, didn't leave my house. I'm 22 now, and my level of social growth is stunted at a 15 year old level. What can I do? I can't speak to people..

2 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-26 00:48 ID:huB4yaCf

The best medicine for this sort of thing is to force yourself. Get a job where you have to interact with people. I don't mean a grocery clerk were its just "Hi, that will be 10 dollars, have a nice day" crap. A job where you rely on coworkers. There are other ways, but this is easy, and you can get paid in the meantime, so even if you have a shitty day its not a total loss. Alternatively, you could try for trade school or adult education and get a GED. Nice benefit there is that if you have a rough time of it, you might have some kind of advisor/counselor you can talk to.

In the meantime, work on your self-esteem. Start exercising and improve your diet, and get a hobby, even if its a nerdy one.

Really... inaction is the only way you can fail here. I know this first-hand.

There are a lot of people out there who suck, and there will be lots of people out there who think you suck. The only way to find out if you can make friends is to sample the pool, so to speak.

That'd be what I do, anyway. Admittedly, my own social life is terribly modest, I pretty much only interact with coworkers... I've been invited to things like golf outings, but I really don't play golf and the like. My friends are all pretty much gone now, so I spend a lot of nights playing video games. In short, I feel you.

3 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-26 12:41 ID:Hhhz9zl5

I am currently in a uni course that requires a lot of communication skills, and working with people. Public speaking gives me the shits. I don't think there's an easy fix for this type of thing, but what I did was get a job in retail as a sales cashier. It doesn't require too much talk, but it does make you meet lots of different people face to face. I have definitely noticed the difference in the 6 months I've been working. Meeting people doesn't fluster me as much, and I don't have to read from a script when I talk on the phone anymore.

4 Name: 3 : 2009-06-26 12:48 ID:Hhhz9zl5

I only just read >>2's post, and realised I posted something totally contradictory.

Personally I think the cashier job helped me out alot at the beginning, but now that I've picked up the skills I needed, it's getting a bit limiting. Hence I am looking for more people-work now. But I reckon if you threw me down in the deep end of having actual coworkers at the beginning, I would have sunk, and kept to myself.

5 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-26 22:02 ID:+ldB7F99

>>4 your testimony is very interesting. And your idea of working as a cashier to get used to people is very good.

6 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-27 15:47 ID:hvBANzQY

Everything I know about social interaction I read in books. I am anxious and awkward, but somehow I can fake being a confident person in conversation.

7 Name: Anonymous : 2009-06-30 04:00 ID:zqYGPiZs

I can relate to OP, so what could I do if even being a cashier is overwhelming?

8 Name: Anonymous : 2009-07-01 04:20 ID:JTE5gdSq

Being a cashier would be overwhelming for me, too.

I was thinking I could get a job at a grocery store, maybe just organizing shelves and that sort of thing. People might walk by and ask questions every once in a while.

It'd be rough at first, but, the payoff is worth it I think

9 Name: Anonymous : 2009-07-02 23:44 ID:njesweQy

OP here. For those asking about jobs..I myself hold a part time job. 4 days a week tops. I work in a hospital in the shipping/receiving department, taking care of materials and such. When I looked for a job I tried getting something that I knew wouldn't require much social interaction.

I don't really interact with people much at work now, but when I do I find it helps. I've started to study peoples emotions, personalities and personal traits, to get an understanding on how to become more "normal". I just lack any way to "test" what I've learned out, as I have no friends and basically spend every minute alone.

10 Name: Anonymous : 2009-07-04 12:07 ID:lkc13CFW

Yeah, I think that'll be the way to go.

Perhaps conventions, clubs, that sort of thing?
I'm assuming you're a hardcore anime/gamer..

Or you could take up a tafe/vocational or language course. Like any sort of short course that would interest you, and perhaps you might meet like minded people (or at least have something to talk about).

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