It's been a few years now that I have less and less respect toward people. Long story short : I led the hard reject life and lost whom I loved either by a betrayal from them or we coudn't stand each other anymore. Over the years I remain friendless and got use to the idea. I sort of enjoyed my solitude for which brought me some peace even though at times I felt lonely. Over time, I came to see general people as a threat. I hate them and they all seem evil to me to the point where even homicide seems a reasonable option. For the record, i am not schizophrenic. I just hate people to the point of it.) I never trust anybody even if they show they do care about me. I like to use dark and morbid subject to talk about to scare away those I do not like. I can barely deal with the fact of having some ''friends'' without feeling weird and why they keep being nice to me. I do seek professional help which brings me some form of relief even if it is temporary. I have both personal and group counseling. I am comfortable with the personal (one on one) counseling and I hate above all the other I am forced to do the groups to be allowing one on one counseling.
Person of importance or not, I do not care. If i feel that that person does not deserve my respect, I wont be shy to tell him what I think of him/her. Yelling, swearing, insulting... Anything goes. I lived in the ghettos cause I coudnt afford anything better (I was having a student job at the time). I saw so many people I considered as ''trash'' because of the life they led (hookers, junkies... name it) and I was stuck with them and barely anyone cared to help me out. This is where I started to despise people. I do have some slight form of respect toward ''anonymous'' people and this is why I am asking:
-Am I alone to be like this?
-Is there anything I can do to change that without resulting to any form of violence and perhaps, change for the good?
Thanks, Anonymous
Well, I just want to say that it is OK to lack respect towards people. Just act like you respect them instead, try hard. But whenever they're really driving you mad with their talk just politely tell them off. Avoid being too aggressive but don't try to change yourself.
Don't try to be happy in the same way others are happy, be happy the way you are and accept yourself, your opinion about others barely matters in your daily life, it's only a question of acting out.
You are not alone.
I think it´s a complex situation,but you need to keep trying. I do feel so disappointed of people many times, but I consider that there´s always someone (or a few ones) worth trusting and caring about. I know,the majority probably isn´t, but once you find those few ones, the situation gets easier by feeling less lonely in the world. I wish you luck :)
Do you think that your presence would increase respect in human beings for others OP?
>>2 Somehow, "just be happy, do things to be happy" always struck me as advice too vague to help. Still, you adjust to your situation (as well as illusions) and it has worked for many. It's much like, well, "becoming the mask."
Fellow misanthrope, you aren't alone because human nuances (faults?) make them do things that are insipid and annoying. Still, there faults are often your own and that of those you respect, seperated only by degree. What makes them worth your attentions, let alone disgust? They are flaws in a flawed system, and we either deal with it, ignore it, or go mad because of it. As people go, it took me a while to adjust to kindness and emotion, I doubt it will ever feel heartfelt... but it is a learning process.
If you really want to change, then through effort it will happen. Sometimes people don't change because they only feel like they should, but do not deeply wish to. Good luck dealing with this, I've been through most of it, and I assure you it CAN get worse. So we live with the life we are in, merely perceiving it makes it a dream anyhow.
You sound like a total dick and you just need your ass kicked. Try going to the gym and taking some boxing lessons. You'll develop some respect for others pretty fast when you find out they can knock you out with a three inch punch.