Hey all.

I am currently a senior in high school, and I have one friend who's my best friend. We've only started being friends in junior year or so, but she's the person I'm closest to in the entire school - my other friends are 'temporary' kinds of things and to be honest I regard them more as fun acquaintances than friends. I won't miss them when I go to college. However, I will miss my best friend - in fact I already feel lonely and sad about this.

Here's one weird thing though, and a pattern I've noticed in myself. I tend to sabotage these great friendships. I tend to be cold and standoffish and push them away. Basically, I start out as a fun friend, and then I slowly morph into an asshole. I seriously don't want this to happen with this friend, so I've been suppressing the urges to be a huge ass. I mean, I honestly care about my friend. I don't want to hurt her, yet at the same time, I have this weird urge to.I have no idea why I do this. I've had other good friendships before that I singlehandedly ruin by being cold and standoffish and spiteful. I'm afraid of doing this again because I don't want to hurt and lose my friend.

tl;dr: I'm a person who's an asshole to my closest friends even though I care about them/don't want to hurt them. Why do I do this?

Talk to your parents

No offense bro, but I don't see how talking to my parents will help with this...