Background:
GF of 3 years starts talking to one of my old friends, they get close.
Hey guys, a while ago a posted that my girlfriend and one of my friends started talking, lots. I guess there have been developments.
We both moved out of our University house and are now in a long distance relationship. I moved back home yesterday, she a week ago, so we have been apart one week today.
I talked to her on webcam yesterday, and we had an arguement, sort of. One of the first things she said was that she's planning to stay at my friends for a week. Just so you know, she's taking the train to my friends. She has to travel literally half of my country to get there, and the train actually goes past the station I live near.
She doesn't have any money, so she's signing onto jobseekers allowance, and says she'll fund the trip from this. If you don't know what that is, it's a form of government assistance you recieve when looking for a job.
She also said they've seen each otehr on webcam.
I'm worried. So many things I've noticed. She has an odd sleeping pattern, so does he, so they're usually online together. I'm normally tired by 11/12.
She used to leave her PC on, i'm sure just to wait for him to message her.
Whenever he's online, she gets all giddy and excited. I talked to her yesterday on webcam, when he signed on there was an immediate smile.
He is the main thing she talks about.
Now they're planning to meet IRL for a week. I asked what they'd get upto. She said they'd go drinking, maybe watch a film and play agame. For a week? I think I know whats going on, really.
I was distanct towards the end of university, I wanted to focus on grades (it worked, I got great grades), so I paid less attention to her. She seeked out companionship elsewhere, found it, and it's better than mine. Probably because she can say things that we've talked about to him.
He's said to her he doesn't know why we're dating, because I don't spend any time with her. I think he's planning to show her a better life.
Sorry :<
Well heres what I think. Just end it, because we all know what is going to happen when she gets there. And would you rather have her cheat on you and just make things worse for the both of you or would you rather be insightful and see it coming? Because I guarantee after you leave her shes gonna go to that chicken wuss anyways. And you know what? That dudes a big dickhead, because what sick fuck tries to still someone elses girlfriend right in fucking front of them? or however hes trying to do it. Anyways hes not a very good person because he knows she would be cheating on you with him and he doesn't even care.
I did break up before she went to his. See http://4-ch.net/personal/kareha.pl/1305145822/l50
She wants to remain friends but I'm finding it so difficult to talk to her. I deleted the guy (known him for about 5 years now) with no remorse.
This is a disclaimer, I've never had a girlfriend before.
But anyway, I don't see how you can really remain friends with all that history, and with the thoughts and feelings that are still in your head. I'm not saying that you should hate her or hold anything against her, but I think you should not be involved with her at all. No talking, no friendship, nothing. At least not until a year or two have passed, or when you know for sure that your old feelings have died and you've fully moved on.
Otherwise, what's going to happen is every time you talk to her, you'll be reminded of all the stuff that's happened. And probably eventually you'll get upset, it'll all come out at once and you'll have a massive argument or something. Talk to your other friends, or make some new friends, and just try to forget about her.
Good luck,