Well, decide already.
Hurry the fuck up
Hello chaps, I'm >>999さん. You know, this thread took about 30 years to get to >>999, and in that time, the proud scientists of DQN actually managed to develop a crude time machine, which allowed me to travel back in time in order to tell you what the topic of this thread, as named in >>999 will be!
And so, without further ado, I quote exactly what I will reply with in >>999!
"999 Name: ⊂二二二（ ＾ω＾）二二二⊃ : 1993-09-15818 03:24
And so I said to him, 'That's not a hippopotamus - THAT'S MY WIFE!'"
Oh crap. They told me they perfected the return function. BUT IT'S NOT WORKING. Now my presence here is altering the course of the timestream, which will doubtlessly effect the outcome of this thread.
At least I can console myself with the knowledge I'll get to see the inaguration of President Ayumu Kasuga first-hand!
Hello chaps, I'm a second >>999さん. You see, the paradox created by the first >>999さん's disruption of the timestream caused a different poster to get >>999! And that poster was me, so I used the time machine to travel back and inform you what the REAL >>999 is going to be.
And so, without further ado, I quote exactly what I will reply with in >>999!
"999 Name: ⊂二二二（ ＾ω＾）二二二⊃ : 1993-09-15818 03:16
Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread. I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya? Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in. Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "150 yen off" written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You, don't come to Yoshinoya just because it's 150 yen off, fool. It's only 150 yen, 1-5-0 YEN for crying out loud. There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Yoshinoya, huh? How fucking nice. "Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large." God I can't bear to watch. You people, I'll give you 150 yen if you get out of those seats. Yoshinoya should be a bloody place. That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place. Women and children should screw off and stay home. Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra-large, with extra sauce." Who in the world orders extra sauce nowadays, you moron? I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra sauce?" I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour. Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra sauce"? Coming from a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra green onion. That's right, extra green onion. This is the vet's way of eating. Extra green onion means more green onion than sauce. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key. And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable. However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword. I can't recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's special."
Hello 1993, I'm President Ayuma, the first japanese female president of the United States Of Earth. I have an important message to pass on to you from the future.
Please, 1993, hear my message and let it speak to your hearts.
In canada, milk no longer comes in bags.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm charging my time machine.
In the futures you all come from, does DQN ever get more than six users?
This post intentionally left blank
>>7 In our time, DQN is a large, full-immersion cyber-experience which comes complete with a virtual jacuzzi, cyber bar and "usb mittens".
Sadly, DQN has only have 6 interfaces, most of them rectal.
>>999 is preemptively banned for irresponsibly meddling with the space-time continuum
KABOOM! SMOKE Cough cough cough! Gharagh! The time machine! It's exploded! Chronotron particles everywhere! Timular rips in quantum foam all over! Paradoxes everywhere! The temporal radiation - it's, it's changing time! ZZZZZZZAP ZIP PCHOW!
Oh no, it's created a terrible alternate future! In Canada, milk now comes on the OUTSIDE of bags! How terrible!
I regret to say that due to the irresponsible use of time travel, the Japanese won World War II, and KARIFORUNIA and OHSUTORARIA are colonies of Japan. Boris Yeltsin is the current US President. I'm not really sure how that happened. Also, Britney Spears has married Takeru Kobayashi but I don't expect it to last, personally.
bippu
LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!
It's just a jump to the left
And then a step to the right
With your hands on your hips
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane,
Let's do the Time Warp again!
Hello, I am >>998, come here to rescue >>999, repair the time machine and return with >>999 after narrowly escaping you primitives' evil warlord and his minions.
So...would >>999, his plucky sidekick (whom he adopted for comedic value) and the token love interest he's taking to a better life in our future civilisation please step forward? The integrity of the inverse capacitator cannot hold out much longer!
Stop right there! >>998, this is the LAST time you meddle with my evil plans! I'll see to it that NONE OF US make it back to the future! AHHHAHAHAHA!
STOP!
I am Takamachi Nanoha, freelancer officer of the Time-Space Administration Bureau. You all are under arrest for temporal distortion. If you surrender now, you will have the right to plead your case in court.
Otherwise, I'LL JUST HAVE TO USE MY HELLISH TOOLS TO GET YOU TO LISTEN
＿＿ ＿＿
／ ☣ ＼ ／ ☣ ＼ Hold it right there! All of you!
〔 （◣◎◢）〕 〔 （◣◎◢）〕 The Damage Control Ministry is aware of an enormous time-space disruption
（つ㍍ づ （つ㍍ づ and we are moving to seal it! But all travellers from the future
｜ ｜ | ｜ ｜ | are a threat to the 4-ch State, and need to be neutralised.
Please step this way, over towards the Damage Control truck. We promise you won't be ...harmed...
（_＿）＿） （_＿）＿）
＿＿ ＿＿
／ ☣ ＼ ／ ☣ ＼
〔 （ ﾟ ヮﾟ）〕〔 （ ﾟ ヮﾟ）〕We didn't seal it in time, OH SH- MITON GA SUKI!
（つ㍍ づ （つ㍍ づ
｜ ｜ | ｜ ｜ |
（_＿）＿） （_＿）＿）
＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
／∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴＼
／∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴＼
/∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴＼
/∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵ ＼
/∴∵∴∵∴∵∴/ ヽ / ヽ ∴∵∴|
/∴∵∴∵∴∵∴ | ● | | ● | ∴∵∴|
|∴∵∴∵∴∵∴ ヽ ノ ヽ ノ ∴∵∴|
|∴∵∴∵∴／ /￣ヽ ＼ ∴.|
|∴∵∴∵／ ‐‐-- ヽ＿/ --‐‐ ＼ |
|∴∵∴ / ‐‐-- | --‐‐ |
|∴∵∴/ ‐‐-- | --‐‐ |
|∴∵∴| ＼ | ／ | ／￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
|∵∴∵| ＼＿＿＿__|＿＿／ / ＜ Don't feel, use logic, think it through. This is the way of tanasinn.
＼∵ | ＼ / ／ ＼＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
＼ | ＼＿＿／ ／
＼ ／
＼＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿_／