ITT >>999-san decides the topic of this thread (23)

1 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4864 01:04

Well, decide already.

2 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4864 01:08

Hurry the fuck up

3 Name: >>999さん : 1993-09-4864 01:47

Hello chaps, I'm >>999さん. You know, this thread took about 30 years to get to >>999, and in that time, the proud scientists of DQN actually managed to develop a crude time machine, which allowed me to travel back in time in order to tell you what the topic of this thread, as named in >>999 will be!

And so, without further ado, I quote exactly what I will reply with in >>999!

"999 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-15818 03:24
And so I said to him, 'That's not a hippopotamus - THAT'S MY WIFE!'"

4 Name: >>999さん : 1993-09-4864 01:59

Oh crap. They told me they perfected the return function. BUT IT'S NOT WORKING. Now my presence here is altering the course of the timestream, which will doubtlessly effect the outcome of this thread.

At least I can console myself with the knowledge I'll get to see the inaguration of President Ayumu Kasuga first-hand!

5 Name: >>999さん : 1993-09-4864 02:25

Hello chaps, I'm a second >>999さん. You see, the paradox created by the first >>999さん's disruption of the timestream caused a different poster to get >>999! And that poster was me, so I used the time machine to travel back and inform you what the REAL >>999 is going to be.

And so, without further ado, I quote exactly what I will reply with in >>999!

"999 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-15818 03:16
Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread. I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya? Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in. Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "150 yen off" written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You, don't come to Yoshinoya just because it's 150 yen off, fool. It's only 150 yen, 1-5-0 YEN for crying out loud. There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Yoshinoya, huh? How fucking nice. "Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large." God I can't bear to watch. You people, I'll give you 150 yen if you get out of those seats. Yoshinoya should be a bloody place. That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place. Women and children should screw off and stay home. Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra-large, with extra sauce." Who in the world orders extra sauce nowadays, you moron? I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra sauce?" I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour. Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra sauce"? Coming from a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra green onion. That's right, extra green onion. This is the vet's way of eating. Extra green onion means more green onion than sauce. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key. And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable. However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword. I can't recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's special."

6 Name: President Ayuma!5Z5MAAHNQ6 : 1993-09-4864 03:09

Hello 1993, I'm President Ayuma, the first japanese female president of the United States Of Earth. I have an important message to pass on to you from the future.

Please, 1993, hear my message and let it speak to your hearts.

In canada, milk no longer comes in bags.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm charging my time machine.

7 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4864 04:42

In the futures you all come from, does DQN ever get more than six users?

8 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4864 04:47

This post intentionally left blank

9 Name: >>999さん : 1993-09-4864 07:24

>>7 In our time, DQN is a large, full-immersion cyber-experience which comes complete with a virtual jacuzzi, cyber bar and "usb mittens".

Sadly, DQN has only have 6 interfaces, most of them rectal.

10 Name: MODD!5JrU4QOlH6 : 1993-09-4864 09:56

>>999 is preemptively banned for irresponsibly meddling with the space-time continuum

11 Name: >>999さん : 1993-09-4864 11:59

KABOOM! SMOKE Cough cough cough! Gharagh! The time machine! It's exploded! Chronotron particles everywhere! Timular rips in quantum foam all over! Paradoxes everywhere! The temporal radiation - it's, it's changing time! ZZZZZZZAP ZIP PCHOW!

Oh no, it's created a terrible alternate future! In Canada, milk now comes on the OUTSIDE of bags! How terrible!

12 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4864 19:07

I regret to say that due to the irresponsible use of time travel, the Japanese won World War II, and KARIFORUNIA and OHSUTORARIA are colonies of Japan. Boris Yeltsin is the current US President. I'm not really sure how that happened. Also, Britney Spears has married Takeru Kobayashi but I don't expect it to last, personally.

13 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4864 20:56


14 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4865 04:20


It's just a jump to the left
And then a step to the right
With your hands on your hips
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane,
Let's do the Time Warp again!

15 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4866 03:28

Hello, I am >>998, come here to rescue >>999, repair the time machine and return with >>999 after narrowly escaping you primitives' evil warlord and his minions.

So...would >>999, his plucky sidekick (whom he adopted for comedic value) and the token love interest he's taking to a better life in our future civilisation please step forward? The integrity of the inverse capacitator cannot hold out much longer!

16 Name: >>997-san : 1993-09-4866 03:36

Stop right there! >>998, this is the LAST time you meddle with my evil plans! I'll see to it that NONE OF US make it back to the future! AHHHAHAHAHA!

17 Name: Takamachi Nanoha!i7iiKh4SRQ : 1993-09-4866 03:43


I am Takamachi Nanoha, freelancer officer of the Time-Space Administration Bureau. You all are under arrest for temporal distortion. If you surrender now, you will have the right to plead your case in court.


18 Name: Sachiko Sato!yl21BvWidQ : 1993-09-4866 03:46

I am Sachiko Sato, the defender of The Free Time Society of the Greater Universe, and I will vanquish thee, because I'm a hot chick dressed in leather with ninja skills and awesome time travel power! Don't make me come over there! I have FUZZY SHURIKEN!!!

19 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4866 03:55

  __     __
 / ☣ \   / ☣ \ Hold it right there! All of you!
〔 (◣◎◢)〕 〔 (◣◎◢)〕 The Damage Control Ministry is aware of an enormous time-space disruption
 (つb づ   (つb づ    and we are moving to seal it! But all travellers from the future
 | | |   | | |  are a threat to the 4-ch State, and need to be neutralised.
Please step this way, over towards the Damage Control truck. We promise you won't be ...harmed...
 (__)_)  (__)_) 

20 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4867 04:14

  __     __
 / ☣ \   / ☣ \
〔 ( ゚ ヮ゚)〕〔 ( ゚ ヮ゚)〕We didn't seal it in time, OH SH- MITON GA SUKI!
 (つb づ   (つb づ    
 | | |   | | |     
 (__)_)  (__)_) 

21 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4867 04:26

〔 (◢◎◣)〕 Well, there goes the neighborhood...
 (つ` づ  
 | | | 

22 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4868 01:22

     /∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵ \
    /∴∵∴∵∴∵∴/ ヽ   / ヽ ∴∵∴|
    /∴∵∴∵∴∵∴ | ● |  | ● | ∴∵∴|
    |∴∵∴∵∴∵∴ ヽ ノ  ヽ  ノ ∴∵∴|
    |∴∵∴∵∴/     / ̄ヽ    \ ∴.|
    |∴∵∴∵/  ‐‐--  ヽ_/  --‐‐ \ |
    |∴∵∴ /   ‐‐--    |   --‐‐   |
    |∴∵∴/    ‐‐--    |   --‐‐   |
    |∴∵∴|   \         |     /   |  / ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄
    |∵∴∵|    \_____|__/    / < Don't feel, use logic, think it through. This is the way of tanasinn.
     \∵ |      \       /     /   \____________
      \ |        \__/    /
        \                /

23 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4869 06:10

 ( __ )
 ( ・∀・) < My Name is Squeeks XXIX and I'm from the future.
 (つ   つ  Stop this nonsense at once, >>999, >>998 and >>997-san!
 | | |    Winter, me, and that other guy are getting lonely without you three. 

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