I need some advice... This is the only place I can think of to ask, but have been scared for a while to ask for advice because I don't want to be flamed, or be given the usual "just turn the computer off lol" response.

For the past year or so any day that's not a school day I've been spending around 20 hours a day online with 4 hours of sleep, usually falling asleep while voice chatting. Normal activities are 4ch and chatting. I've tried making friends in real life but fail miserably. I've tried simply turning the computer off and putting it in the closet many times, but I either start panicking and hyperventilate or get depressed and sleep all day. Otherwise, I take it out and lie to myself, saying I'll use it "just for school purposes" or "just to listen to music", but end up doing things just like I normally do.

Please give me advice... I'm so fucking lonely like this. D:

Thank you very much for your time. m(_ _)m

Sounds like your addicted to your computer.

....

Have you considered living without one for a while?

I had a panic attack last time I tried a couple days of locking my computer up and giving my friend the key.

> I either start panicking and hyperventilate or get depressed and sleep all day.

You're a nutcase. Put it away again, and this time WRITE DOWN A RESOLUTION that you will not bring it back for at least a week. This was hard for me when I was in school but with willpower you can manage it. You don't need to make friends in real life-- strike out for yourself. Learn guitar, biking, drawing. Go to the library. Get a JOB. Anything that keeps you OUT OF YOUR ROOM for as long as possible is great.

>>1
If this is serious, you may need some kind of professional help.
Try seeing a counselor or doctor if you can afford it.
Otherwise, since cold turkey hasn't worked, just take it one step at a time. Maybe start with getting more sleep. Create a daily schedule. Go for short walks. Find some volunteer opportunities in your area. Find a support group for Internet Addiction, even an online forum devoted to such.

The above is serious.

I've looked for a forum etc for help on it, but I couldn't find any.

I can't get much sleep... I hallucinate and have sleep paralysis a lot so I'm really scared of falling asleep. :(

Yikes, massive insomnia too? The hallucinations might warrant medical attention as well.

I picked up photography with digital camera to get away from the computer, works well so far.

Maybe if I had a hobby I'd have reason to not use the computer. :/

I used to play a lot of games, draw, read a lot, but I was always lonely, so I used the internet. Now if I try to play games that aren't MMOs, read, or do anything like that, I start feeling really depressed.

What exactly do you hallucinate? What makes you scared of falling asleep or is it just irrational?

If I close my eyes I feel like someone's breathing on me or touching me. I also hear a gradually escalating ringing noise and voices when I try to fall asleep or when I wake up in the middle of the night/morning.

The sleep paralysis doesn't help much, because it usually happens right as I wake up from a nightmare. When I wake up I can't move, and as an added bonus, 4/5 times I start hearing shit. I know it's just in my head, but I can't help being scared.

go to a psychiatrist

Hallucinations are scary. I never had much, but I can't stand them either.
I think they're due to the computer... It's a very nervously exciting device. This is very unhealthy, I guess you know that.
Your feeling depressed is due to, I think, the fact that you're thinking about your situation, while reading or something else. When you're playing MMOs or chatting, you're with people, so you assume it's all right. As you find yourself alone, you're feeling something is not right, you start reflecting about your condition, telling yourself things are not ok, worrying... You get the impression you're not doing something, and that you should since your situation is bad. But actually you're not doing less than usual, you're doing even more, but the computer keeps you always "on", gives you always an information to treat, so you have the feeling you're doing something, or at least you don't think about something else. Am I right ?
I know that's what everybody says, and that it's easier said than done, but just do something. You used to read ? Get back to it. I am in a similar situation, only much less. I often wanted to go out, but I thought there was nothing to do outside... (I still think so) I ended up just walking. I live in Paris, and I happen to like the near surrounding of it, the suburb. So I went walking a little (generally 2 hours) in it before going to school. It's just refreshing (well no, with the pollution and all, but you get the idea. Changes your mind.).
...Anyway, yeah, do things. Find something to do. Personally, I refuse to ever see any psy whatsoever, and since I started thinking less about having friends and all that, I'm feeling better and actually it IS getting better (also because people are more intelligent as I'm advancing in studies...), but these are my case.
Also and finally, I tried to write down the reasons why I was feeling depressed (when I was), not only it helps feel better, but it teaches how to properly ring a problem and its implications...

If you want to

1. limit the time that you can access the Internet (or even the computer),

and/or
2. block yourself from some websites you know you shouldn't visit at all,
then you can try the methods introduced at http://www.liu-diy.com (Limit Internet Usage - Do-It-for-Yourself).

I refuse to see a psychiatrist. I have problems being seen a lot by people in real life, much less talking with them. I will try getting back into old hobbies etc this coming week and see if that helps. An internet timer etc probably won't help, since I know I'll just find a way to remember any password I set, and I don't want to set one randomly for fear that I couldn't get my settings back.

I'll try to only use the computer for 3 hours a day for the next week. Since it's a laptop, it has a little switch to enable/disable internet, so even if I need to use the computer for school work, I can switch that off so that messengers can't log in right as I start.

The only problem I'm worried about is insomnia... I haven't slept with the computer off in 3 months, normally falling asleep while using it (think me as pathetic as you want).

I'll try my best. Thank you for your advice.

>>15
From the sound of things, you need to start improving your self-image.

• Don't speak poorly of yourself to others or in your head.
• Think of things can do or have done well.
• Encourage yourself by talking positive to yourself (in your head, if you don't want people to think your crazy). It may sound stupid, but it will help.