Does he like me? (50)

1 Name: N/A : 2006-08-26 19:35 ID:VznMoKNW

I recently met this guy, he is really really lovely. Not the kind of guy i thought i would ever find attractive. Since meeting him i have seen him almost every weekend and we talk almost every day. I think he is a bit shy and has never had a girlfriend. Do i wait around in the hopes that he likes me back or do i get over it and move on. (he is a bit of a geek(ment in the nicest possible way) and i am not) I just dont know him very well and cant 'read' him.
What do i do? Please help!!!

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-26 19:40 ID:Heaven

Tell he something, if he is shy he won't tell you if likes you.

3 Name: N/A : 2006-08-26 20:01 ID:VznMoKNW

I dont want to say anything to him unless i know that he may like me in return, i am not keen on rejection

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-26 20:06 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>3

You don't like him all that much then. Carry on.

5 Name: N/A : 2006-08-26 20:10 ID:VznMoKNW

>>4

i do, thats the problem. i like him more than i ever have anyone. and although he takes time to invite me over and talk to me, he is so 'cool' about it. Sometimes i think i just annoy him. thats what frustrates me the most, because i really like him

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-26 20:24 ID:1esKZGgG

If you're not a geek, then how did you know about 4ch?

Sorry, if he's shy, you'll almost certainly have to make the first move, and we all know this goes against traditional gender roles so much that you could hang for it. A girl pursuing a guy, what a ridiculous concept!

I don't know, just be his friend for now. Get to know him better. Although he may come off cold and distant, that's the shyness, and not many women put the effort in once they come across that. It also helps to be pretty of course, but that goes without saying. Good luck.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-26 20:59 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>6

Girls pursuing guys, rediculous concept? Do you get out much I wonder? They may be a bit more indirect at times but holy fuck do they ever give it a rest?!

>>5

If you like him all that much, prove it. Just do it, you don't know how many people miss the chance because they are cowards, and how much they get to regret it. I swear even if you are rejected, you will be able to look back more favourably on a rejection one day than you will on a missed chance. Take a chance on winning the prize and at the same time build some character, it's a win win situation.

One must not take rejections, the idea of them too harshly. Successful people get rejected more often than unsuccessful people. What makes you success is that you take many chances and put yourself out there. They don't feel sad about all the times they tried and didn't get it, because they kept trying until they did.

8 Name: frigid onanoko : 2006-08-26 21:43 ID:KdN8Izo4

definitely do not do anything stupid like confessing this to him. It'll be way too surprising and disturbing - maybe taking weeks for him to recover even so much as returning speaking levels.

Instead, try to flirt. Horrible advice, if I say so myself - I have a lot of difficulty with it - but its the only method suitable to not getting rejected. In my opinion, flirting means to talk/joke about light subjects in which you say or imply positive things related the other person. For example, you could laugh out and say its so funny how his nose twitches when he talks, as if you just realised it then and there. Smile at the same time so he knows you're not laughing about him. See what his reaction is.

Obviously don't say things that are not true. His nose really does have to twitch, and you'd better like it. If you do that, the feeling you have while you're with him will help to make it sound like a compliment. Maybe other people here could help a hand and submit some flirting techniques? I'd be interested too!

BTW, guys can be real blockheads. Its very well possible that after you tried your flirting, he lies in bed late at night and only then realizes that maybe your odd behaviour could be interpreted as some move by you. Therefore, his reaction may be delayed by a few days.

good luck

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-26 22:42 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>Instead, try to flirt. Horrible advice, if I say so myself - I have a lot of difficulty with it - but its the only method suitable to not getting rejected

What bullshit is this? Sneak around, don't be upright, he probably can't handle the truth? You wanna know what I think of women who are too afraid to say what they think and feel and play games instead?

If this guy really is a friend, he will not suddenly realize all the things he dislike about her just because she raises the emotional awareness with a confession. Either he feels/starts to feel the same way and everything will be fine, or he will at least make sure there is no uncomfort between them if he doesn't, because he honestly care about her.

N/A, if you suspect this guy is somehow below upright honesty and true friendship, listen to Frigid onanoko. If not think of yourself, wouldn't you be happier if he just came up and confessed to you, rather than giving you vague signals, making you confused and anxious? Flirting may ruin a good friendship just as much as a confession may ruin a bad friendship.

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-26 22:55 ID:hb4ZfJ5O

Many, many years from now you will look back at your life. You won't regret the things you did, but the ones that you did not do. I think you should do it before he becomes too attached and it's like OMG YOU ARE LIKE MY BEST FRIEND ^____^ You may be rejected but it's better than spending the rest of your life wondering "What if..."

Just go for it and good luck. :)

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-26 23:43 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>10

Nothing wrong with "best friend", it's like the perfect ground for a relationship, because you should not be with someone who isn't also your best friend.
SRSLY ^_________^

12 Name: N/A : 2006-08-27 07:12 ID:VznMoKNW

All good but coflicting advice, the majority of it seems to say i should just go for it

as to flirting suggested by >>8 i do know how to flirt, just have never done it with him because he was not the kind of guy i felt instantly attracted to.
also we live in different towns so i dont know when i am next going to see him.

i like what >>11 says about playing games, because i hate game playing which is why i am thinking about just letting him know how i feel...

there was one instance when i was at his house and his baby brother staretd crying into his shoulder, and i said to our other friend 'this is the effect i have on men' (it was a joke) and then he said 'so what am i?'

i am getting very mixed signals from him, is this because he doesnt 'know how to act and react' around me?

13 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-08-27 07:20 ID:Heaven

>>8

>Its very well possible that after you tried your flirting, he lies in bed late at night and only then realizes that maybe your odd behaviour could be interpreted as some move by you.

Oh man... This has happened to me numerous times..

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-27 09:56 ID:ri5PL6+R

>>12

If he never had a girlfriend before, no experience, then this is very likely.

Maybe you should give it some more time, be nice to him, and then tell him you like him?

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-27 15:05 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>there was one instance when i was at his house and his baby brother staretd crying into his shoulder, and i said to our other friend 'this is the effect i have on men' (it was a joke) and then he said 'so what am i?'

lol, how cute

"she thinks of me only as a friend! D;" -he thought

You can also read out of it that you make him happy as a man.

It would seem he is constantly checking for clues of how you feel about him, add his probable insecurity to that and we have an explanation for the reaction.

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-27 15:18 ID:Heaven

>BTW, guys can be real blockheads. Its very well possible that after you tried your flirting, he lies in bed late at night and only then realizes that maybe your odd behaviour could be interpreted as some move by you. Therefore, his reaction may be delayed by a few days.

I'd say that in this case the woman either sucks at flirting or is doing it wrong or in such a roundabout way that it is hard to find a difference between regular friendly chat and flirting
Girls need to be more straightforward! If you tell a guy you like him, and you are decently attractive at least, he will be flattered. It's not like he's going to stop talking to you unless you stop talking to him.

17 Name: comrade : 2006-08-27 18:27 ID:GOPsNtJW

go for it

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-27 21:35 ID:Cy0FaPQQ

>>10

hmm.. you really sound like some1 I know ^^

A-kun?

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-28 12:21 ID:Heaven

if you're not a dork howcome you're posting on 4-ch?

20 Name: N/A : 2006-08-29 06:30 ID:VznMoKNW

it was something he mentioned.
i met him a while ago and then he called me and invited me ova to his house (the second time we met) and i had never given him my number... he must have got it from his mum (friend of my mum)

21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-29 15:20 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>20

What are you refering to now?

22 Name: N/A : 2006-08-29 21:09 ID:VznMoKNW

>>21

Sorry
I am on iichan cause its something he mentioned, and i was just comenting on the fact that he called me to invite me ova to his... and this was the second time i met him, he must have got the number from his mum cause i neva gave him my number...
just trying to workout if he likes me or not.

23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-29 22:19 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>22

>>I am on iichan cause its something he mentioned

lol

Whatever just do now what you feel is right. Forget fear and doubt, do what feels right.

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 04:13 ID:M2M4LyhZ

lol. if he mentioned it, chances are he is reading this...

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 05:10 ID:sQGsHxee

>if he mentioned it, chances are he is reading this...

( ゚ -゚) Yeah.

( ゚ ヮ゚) If you're reading this, tell her you like her!

( ゚ ヮ゚)つ And give her a present! Like mittens!

26 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 07:24 ID:54kwaULg

>>1
I don't get it, what do you want to do?

This is America, right? (Well, considering you use "mum" you're probably Australian, Canadian, British or something, but still..) It's not like you're going to/have to confess to him or ask him to marry you.

Just casually ask him out to a coffee shop or something, and start from there. (Or maybe to a movie theather/concert... like "I bought this ticket for a friend of mine, but now she's too busy to go. Do you want to? If not, I guess I can find someone else...") Make up some sort of excuse for it, so that if he rejects your offer without a big reason, it won't really be worth much.

If he does accept, start from there, and just build it up. You two seem to be pretty cool with each other already, anyway. (Personally, I've never even invited a girl over to my house.)

PS. Is it really relevant if he's "a it of a geek" or not? I think you're posting among a lot of people like that... pretty soon we can consider you a bit of one! :p

>>8

>BTW, guys can be real blockheads. Its very well possible that after you tried your flirting, he lies in bed late at night and only then realizes that maybe your odd behaviour could be interpreted as some move by you.

Yeah, I'm a guy, and I've done that quite a few times... but I don't think it's limited to just guys. >>1 herself might even be doing the same.

27 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 07:48 ID:Heaven

THIS ISN'T IICHAN. IICHAN IS FULL OF FAGGOTS. OKAY, THIS PLACE IS TOO, BUT IT'S STILL NOT IICHAN.

28 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 08:20 ID:Heaven

>>27

Well newsflash, 4-ch is an entire sub-category under Discussion on iichan, so TECHNICALLY this is, therefore part of iichan. And perhaps the faggotry influx can thus be explained.

Just saying.

29 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 09:00 ID:Heaven

YEAH AND THE ENTIRE INTERNET IS A SUB-CATEGORY ON GOOGLE

30 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 11:55 ID:Heaven

>>29
ROBOTS.TXT

31 Name: N/A : 2006-08-30 15:28 ID:JuJnss2V

I hope he sint reading this, but have just realised that you are right... he probably has/will. oh dear
:-)

thanks all for the advice

32 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-30 16:08 ID:wwpKRNwO

>>31
problem solved then

33 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-31 05:31 ID:sQGsHxee

( ゚ -゚) I really do hope he gives her some mittens.

34 Name: N/A : 2006-08-31 14:48 ID:JuJnss2V

yeah me too.

thanks >>33

35 Name: Agro_dka : 2006-09-05 20:53 ID:PvNxQnTf

I think you should get to know him, get to become his friend..

As someone who might be considered shy, I know how hard it is for me to ask out a girl in any situation. Likely is.. if he likes you t all, he won't show it. You have to get him to open up..

Don't wait for him to make the move.. he doesn't even know you like him.

36 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-09-06 23:20 ID:y3PuusF9

Yeah. It would be nice IF YOU MADE A MOVE ON HIM. Because nerdy guys like us here can't find the strength to admit it. If we did, it was because he had a lot of people supporting him! But.....Chances still are You have to make the move! If he was gonna do it, he would've posted it on 4ch to get help! But looks like he doesn't know this place.

37 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-06 23:32 ID:FOdkrGdb

We "nerdy" guys are the nicest kind of guys, but we are just shy mostly. You've got to make the first move

38 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-07 00:00 ID:Heaven

Girls hitting on guys is so moeeeeeeeeeee~

39 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-07 00:08 ID:rzBPQOio

>>36

and whose fault is that?

40 Name: Mireille guy : 2006-09-07 03:25 ID:3FZrZtXc

Another girl came to this forum with a similar problem. I solved her problem by telling her to add a simple sentence to her conversation. Simply add "and I like you" casually to any sentence.
You could go like, "The weather is so nice today, and I like you". Guys are dumb. Just repeat it if he doesn't get it. Then you ask, "And you?"

Being a guy or a girl is no reason for not making a move.

41 Name: Mireille guy : 2006-09-07 03:34 ID:3FZrZtXc

Most nerdy guys have odds going for them because they like to learn without caring that others label them as nerds. They got "pride" so to speak. That usually helps in one way or another.

They are not necessarily "nicest" but simply, social retards that don't distiguish between passiveness, submission and shyness (and none of these are synonyms for nice).

42 Name: N/A : 2006-09-07 05:20 ID:VznMoKNW

I told him, he likes me. yay

43 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-07 12:07 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>42

ELABORATE ASAP

I knew it btw.

44 Name: N/A : 2006-09-07 15:05 ID:JuJnss2V

>>43

you knew what???

oh i just told him i liked him and asked if there was a chance of there being an 'us'
he is willing to give it a try!!!

so its a good thing.

45 Name: N/A : 2006-09-07 15:27 ID:JuJnss2V

now its just case of wait and see what happens next time i see him and how we are around one another, have talked a bit since i told him.

46 Name: N/A : 2006-09-07 15:48 ID:JuJnss2V

just worried he has read this, know who he is and ive scared him off somehow...
oh well whats done is done i suppose

47 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-09-07 23:49 ID:1VVHTjIf

OKay! but remember what most of us said! Nerdy guys like us are the nicest guys you'll ever meet yet we are too shy! and yes we all do have a sense of a pride! But were also very sensative! Were very easy to break! You do something wrong to hurt his feelings.....He'll probably think your playing him.

48 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-08 03:26 ID:FluL1TcT

>>44

Good job. The woman making the move is so rare in this world.

49 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-09-08 06:18 ID:EMc3Ktw/

>>44

>>you knew what???

I knew he liked you.

I wouldn't worry too much about this thread, you've been very lovely and haven't said anything bad, if I was him I would probably just think it's cute.

50 Name: N/A : 2006-09-08 08:05 ID:JuJnss2V

>>49

Thank you!

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