Over the past year I've been trying to lie to myself, to think on something else, even got laid and tried to fall in love with other girls, anything but admitting what I, deep down inside, already knew.
I love my sister. Not in the way most brothers love their sisters, but in the way a man loves a woman. Not because of some silly fetish either; when I say love, I mean real, "I'll go to the end of the world for you" love.
My sister is only one year younger than me, making her 20, and currently doesn't have a boyfriend. She's pretty, at least to my eyes, but this is not fueling this. It's her personality. I like no other girl this much. We always had a lot of chemistry, it's as if we were engineered to be together. Only we happened to share our parents. I'm sure if we had been born in different families, we would be the happiest couple in the world right now.
Lately, I realized I could not give up on this, but I'm kind of scared. I know this is fucked up. But I don't know what to do. I've been avoiding her for a couple of weeks, and this is causing her suffering, which in turn breaks my heart. I don't know if I should confess my love and face the consequences of experiencing a kind of love that's considered unacceptable in our society, even from her, or just let it pass and die inside.
Help me /love/, what should I do? I think she may be feeling something similar for me becuase we are very close and she considers me attractive, but I don't know to what extent this may only be wishful thinking on my part. Knowing her, I'm sure she won't be angry at me if I tell her how I feel, but I don't know for sure if she'll feel the same about me. I'm positive our parents and everybody else in our family and community will oppose such love, but if she loves me, I'm willing to face all of them or move to some other country to start a new life with her. But I wouldn't want to put pressure on her or make her feel uneasy, so while I think I should confess, I'm not 100% sure and I don't know to what extent what I think is distorted by my strong affection for her.