basicly, i've been rejected 9 times and i feel like a complete idiot. i feel like shit now and then, i just dont have the confidence to go find someone new cos i just reckon i'm gonna get rejected again. i dont know what i should do now..
have you tried lowering your expectations?
Curious, did you try a different approach each time?
>>2
Don't LOWER your expectations. Have realistic expectations. Don't go after the girl athlete that's interested in shopping if you're an engineering student who has never even stepped in a sporting goods store.
But I don't think this guy's issue is looking out of his league. I'm guessing it may be more in approach. So yeah. Like, >>3
I'm curious how exactly you did pursue these women.
My brother got rejected consecutively at least 3 times (sure, doesn't touch nine, but bear with me) and he still found someone. I say, take a breather and don't think about it. Just go on with your life as it is now and focus on studies, or your job. Anything but women and your relationship problem. Eventually, you will find someone by accident.
>>4 i approuched each of them differently, majority of them always say i'm just a really good friend and i'm a really nice guy. we tend to get really well and they would all tell me stuff they dont tell anyone, thats one reason why i got the idea they might like me.
Only 9? You have a long way to go.
IMO, don't be so aggresive in pursuing a relationship. You sound much too impatient for your own good. If you keep this line of thinking I doubt you'll ever find anyone. Besides, usually relationships just "happen." You never know who you might meet.
>>6
This is what you need to do, approach them like friends (like you have been doing). However constantly throughout the relationship flirt with them seriously. If all goes well you'll either know before you make a serious move that they aren't interested or when you do make a serious move they'll be more receptive.
9 times? gotta keep going
Don't stop till you find her
and NO do NOT LOWER EXPECTATIONS
well, if they tell you "secret embarrasing stuff" stuff they wouldn't tell anyone. they just want to pour their hearts out. (most of the time..) and most of the time it will not work out.
just change your image a bit. look confident about yourself for them (even if you are not)...
try to be always happy. and.. well, the rest is up to you ^^