ok, so two of them are gay? The rest are not gay. It sounds like you are selling them pretty short. The fact is that in the world we live in now, very few people actually ask other people out for "dates." A lot of the time it just happens. A lot of the time it starts out as a borderline friendship. You're probably shooting yourself in the foot by waiting for some guy to ask you out, or putting the pressure on yourself to meet a guy you think is cool. I'd consider starting a relationship with the next new friend you get that you have any interest in. I know that is how a lot of girls get boyfriends.
Sure, it is possible to be just friends. Everyone does it. But by dividing men up into just FRIENDS, and just BOYFRIENDS, you are unknowingly making things harder on yourself, especially in todays world. The people that get lots of relationships don't do things your way.
I have tried to look at it from the girl's perspective and in most cases it really seems like the friendspeech is just a kneejerk response that is both selfish and done out of fear. At best it is a stupid way to try to save another person from getting their feelings hurt that rarely gets the desired results. This doesn't apply to your described situation though, he should have controlled himself, regardless of how much he liked you. His actions were very selfish.
I wasn't defending him in what you quoted, but pointing out how offensive it is that you don't consider your friends as smart, attractive or worthwhile. Have you even considered how insulting that kind of is? It is almost like your friends are beneath the kind of person you want to date. Personally, I think all my friends are great people, and would date most of my female friends if they had any interest in getting to know me better. I think they are great people and I value all that they have given me. The rest of what you quoted was just me pointing out how sad it is that most people shoot for a person better than themselves, and how much rejection that must bring into the world.
As for not having sympathy for him. Fine. But don't hold not understanding the friend crap against him. Hold being a immature jackass that can't control himself and take your feelings into account when he makes advances, against him. That is what he did wrong. He didn't put you first. He put getting into a relationship with you first and you have every right to be angry with him about that.