immature, kind of crazy girl (10)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-03 08:28 ID:jASsMY0e

Well, there's a girl I have liked for a long time (about four years) and she's finally returning some of my feelings :)

The problem is, the whole time I have liked her, I have simultanously been very worried about her. She's easily influenced by others, and doesn't always hang around with a good crowd. She also has some baggage (she was molested by her teenage cousin when she was a child, she has no father and her mom won't tell her anything about him; i think she resents her mother for this. Her mother is also not a very responsible person, IMO). When she was 13-14ish, she became involved in an online relationship with a guy who reminded me, behaviorally, of Charles Manson. Last year he was arrested for having sex with minors in a graveyard for them to join his "club". The girl's been writing him letters and as she begins to trust me more and more, she tells me about her relationship with him and while she doesn't think so, it seems to me that he kind of fucked with her mind. It also seems to me that she's really bad at handling serious criticism, which makes it hard for me to choose between having her trust me even though I'm not really saying what I think, or saying what I think but having her shut down and not listen because she doesn't like what she's hearing.

Should I spend my time trying to handle a girl like this? is there hope? or is this only going to be bad news? Do you have any related experiences?

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-03 14:36 ID:rfGkaO70

Sounds like bad news to me. I wouldn't go near her, and I'd even be unsure about just being friends with her if she acts like you say she does.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-03 14:54 ID:ecP560My

After waiting so long, I would give it a shot,...

Maybe a more sane relationship will stabilise her. There are plenty of teenagers which mature when given the chance

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-03 20:28 ID:Q7KCKTyw

Having known teenagers in a similar situation to her, my experience is that the refusal to take criticism aspect of her personality could undo all the good that you intend. This doesn't mean you shouldn't give it a shot, but just be prepared for both a difficult time keeping her completely away from these harmful elements.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-03 22:33 ID:FmRpSAo+

Oh lord. Do not fucking bother. From personal experience, I'm telling you now, get out while you can or you will regret it. Those are the worst kinds of girls, don't let her drag you down.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-04 04:05 ID:eewkgtkC

It appears that your friend may have some serious mental/emotional issues to work through. I'm not a psychologist, but the worst thing you could do now would be to pull out of her life completely. She's obviously trusting in you as a friend if she's confiding in you. If you suddenly stop being a source of trust and support, it may aggravate the problems she's working with.

Would you want to start a relationship with her? Probably not, unless she makes a concerted effort to fix the problems in her life. But you can definitely be a supportive friend without dating someone. And, who knows: maybe one day down the road she might be in a better situation with her life.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-04 21:14 ID:ebgvTEqO

ABORT MISSION

>CRAZYNESS IS OVER LIMIT
>EXITING...

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-05 03:13 ID:ebgvTEqO

deep waters never run still...

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-05 03:30 ID:FmRpSAo+

>>6

This man is only partly right. Don't talk to her ever again. Trust me. It's not your fault nor your responsibility that she has emotional and mental issues. If you continue talking to her, she'll just drag you into her shit and fuck you over.

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-02-05 15:03 ID:Heaven

give her a chance or just write her off as a lost cause? your choice, man

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