So, I've heard this particular phrase thrown around a lot through the years; it crops up a lot in talk about relationships. It usually appears in conversation like this: "The honeymoon part of a relationship ends after awhile, then you have to work hard to keep the relationship going."

Though what's never explained is this: what exactly does it mean to "work hard" in a relationship?

The "hard work" mostly comprises of putting up with each other, keeping things fun and exciting between you two, making sacrifices, etc.
Tolerating another human being, no matter how much you like them, can eventually become grating at times. This is especially obvious once the initial spark of passion is gone, and you start noticing things about them you don't like, and they also start acting more like their "normal" selves, which you might not like so much (because let's face it, whether we realize it or not, we all act like a much nicer person for someone we really like).
This is apparent in every relationship, though it definitely helps if you can think objectively and find someone you're more compatible with before getting into a relationship.

That's what I was figuring it might be. Thanks for your insight.

i guess it just means being an adult and being mature - which tends to be not so fun. it's the stage where you tend to hear unsatisfied partners complain that their other half is 'childish' or 'immature'.

Actually, I'm starting to think that most of the "work" in relationships is dealing with personality incongruities. It seems that, most of the time, people get themselves in a relationship with someone they're not really compatible with, personality wise. You can get along with an incompatible partner, sure, but it takes much more work. Often more than it's worth.

That being said, there's obviously also differences in values, individual development, health, and such that also cause friction.

This thread can go die again, now.