What >>2 said, but allow me to elaborate:

Your comments about his kissing remind me of my own girlfriend complaints. I guess he finds you so cute that he gets a bit carried away, like if one was tasting a delicious ice cream. But even if he finds you cute, you are not a toy and have your own tastes and needs. It's important that you assert them, not only so that you enjoy kissing, but so that he also has a chance to learn more about yourself.

This kind of pulling and stretching each other's needs is crucial to create a good chemistry within a couple, and the exact same thing will happen when you start having sex. In that sense, kissing and sex are pretty much the same thing, except that for sex the stakes are much higher. That is why a good kisser will have less trouble getting laid, and also why people don't like seeing their SO kiss someone else. In any case, it would be good that you learn mutual communication on the kissing issue, that will facilitate things down the road.

One thing that really helps enhancing communication within a couple is to take dancing lessons together. In salsa, the man leads the woman with very light pressure of the hands and posture. All the communication goes through the body, you won't see salsa dancers talking about their next move, everything flows smoothly through body talk. In dance, communication failures in body talk are immediately obvious, because the dance becomes clumsy, so your can't miss or hide the issues. Since it's only dancing, it's also easier to laugh it out, and not feel vexed about it. Even better, you can exchange partners and understand what YOU are doing wrong, instead of just focusing on your partner's shortcomings. It's sometimes hard to convince guys to take dance classes, which is really stupid, good dancers really have no trouble getting laid, woman understand that someone who dances well with them will probably have good sex with them. This is probably not what you want to advertise to convince your boyfriend, but it will really benefit your relationship if you both learn to communicate via body talk.

One advantage of kissing (and sex) over dancing is that you can - and should - talk while doing it, when something is not working for you, or if you want something you are not getting, and body talk is not working. Talk is fine during kissing and sex, not so much while dancing. So by all means talk to your boyfriend, don't rely on his telepathic skills, he has none. Of course, be sensitive and patient, if you spend your time giving him instructions he may lose confidence and spontaneity. But do assert yourself, that is crucial for a relationship's health.

The worst in a relationship is someone who does not communicate her needs and tastes, and actually fakes an orgasm, to hide the issues. This gives no chance to the guy of learning about her, and he will feel cheated and abused, when he realizes the truth. Of course, a girl faking orgasms going out with a guy who does not care for the woman's needs is a recipe for disaster.

Back to your questions on kissing, use body talk to communicate your needs. If you want something, use your hands and posture to take the initiative. Your boyfriend is doing the same thing, when he holds the back of your head. When something is not working, don't hesitate to openly talk about it. This will sometimes bruise someone's ego, but things can only last if you learn to communicate. Be patient, adjusting to each other's needs takes time and generosity. Also, even when you get used to one another, new hiccups will happen, as people evolve and grow. You have to keep an open mind, and be ready to try new things, while keep asserting your needs and tastes, so that the relationship grows organically and remains authentic.

Happy kissing!