...or should I say woman? She's older than me.
It began like this. I am beginning my career as a freelancer in the film industry but since work doesn't come steady, I work part-time at a regular job. I would say in January she came in as a customer and we got to talking. It turns out she is in the exact same career field with me. We talked a lot that day (so much customer's starting getting ignored and angry) and she eventually left with us exchanging contact info. I didn't get to see her because she was visiting from San Francisco (I live in L.A.) but we ended up exchanging email quite often.
She eventually moved to L.A. a few months later but due to our schedules we didn't get a chance to meet up for a while. One week she invited me to the Opera with her but unfortunately I broke my arm a few days before and was out of it.
We finally met up for coffee in August, though we had steadily been friendly texting and emailing each other. That first meet up was mainly just talking about the work we do and stories of productions of have worked on. But wow... she was beautiful. We ended the day promising to meet up soon and even casually talked about trying out some restaurants sometime.
A few weeks later she went to Korea for a month to visit her family and I didn't see her again until last week. It was again, mainly production talk, though we did finally talk about some private life stuff as well.
The main problem I feel is that though our meeting don't feel romantic, we email each other a lot, which is something other women don't do. I sent her one email last night asking how her Halloween weekend was going and we ended up going back and forth through several messages. Any thoughts?
Even if there was any hope, there area lot of issues with the situation. First there's age. I'm 24 (turning 25 next month). She is definitely older than me, probably a 30-something. She never told me her age (though she mentioned how she grew up watching Buffy The Vampire Slayer... meaning she was a 90s teen) and there is no way I'm giving my age yet (at least until I'm 25... it just sounds older.)
It's weird... I always find myself attracted to older women...but usually at most 5 years older than me. Of course there always lies the problem that they usually expect men to by at a certain point in life to date them while girls my age are either beginning their careers or still wandering around and figuring things out.
Another point is I'm not really a go-getter when it comes to relationships. Like most guys on here, I'm geeky and shy. I have dated but usually when the situation is easy or the girl makes the move. I'm not really assertive. And the sad thing is I used to be. Lately I've been trying to get back to my old self which is why I suddenly emailed her last night (which, like I mentioned, led to a great conversation, not about careers)
So there you have. Not sure where this is going. Do you think I am just a career contact for her? (we haven't added each other on FB). Even if this is nothing, I am happy that I am at least giving some sort of effort. Thoughts welcome.
I think she's happy to be talking to you at all. Maybe she's not waiting for that spark of romance, as she is a career woman after all and probably has a ton of other things to think about, but would welcome the attention if you ever decided to make the first move. Sounds like she'd give you a chance, especially if you're able to easily carry on sudden conversations and get along with her in person.
Why not ask for her Facebook? It isn't so personal they she'd think it was weird.
@ #2, Thanks. Perhaps I'll try moving things along slowly from here on out.
@ #3 ...well like I said, we email each other a lot and text sometimes. And since I haven't told her my age, I don't really want to have her on Facebook.... it would expose a lot and I come out as immature. -_-
There is potential here. Like you said, it's not so common to exchange long mails. I think you should definitely give it a try.
As for the age gap issue, it depends on whether it's an issue for YOU or for her. If it's an issue for you, then you need to clear it out and reach a decision.
If you are afraid that it's an issue for her, then forget it, it's pointless to worry about that. Age gaps can be a problem, but not always (I know some very successful relationships in which the man was much younger than the woman). On the other hand, relationships can fail for many other reasons, so you'll never be in short supply of anxiety if you proceed in that manner. Don't let age become an obsession, and just strive to make whatever you can to live what you earn for.