This could probably go in general, but I see this more on the internet than in real life.
So what’s with people coming to a new site and then thinking they can just jump right in and everyone will love them? I have a wide array of websites I go to personally, and most of them are interactive, close nit community sites. Everyone knows each other, and there are typically a lot of in-jokes. But every once in a while a new person comes along. Most of the time as soon as they find the site, they start posting right away and most of the time they are shunned because:
1. They post stupid stuff
2. They ask stupid questions that a little time spent lurking would answer anyways
3. They’re new
Then when people ignore or make fun of them, they get butthurt and cry about how mean and rude everyone is. But really we’re not being mean. That’s just the way things are and as the old saying goes, if you can’t take the heat get out of the kitchen.
What I’m trying to say is a little lurking goes a long way, don’t post until you get the feel of the website, and if you’re new then expect to get treated like you’re new.
What do you guys think? Am I right, or am I just a hardass for being mean to new people?
What "close-knit" communities are these? Practically every forum I've visited blows (or costs 10 bux) but that aside. Yes, people should probably look around the site for a month or so before posting, "lol wuts a mudkip", but it appears at least to me that people are slowly becoming more and more retarded.
See proof at myspace and youtube comments (especially weeaboo youtube videos).
I was part of a close-knit community a while ago, though it's since dissolved considerably due to stagnation of its parent site and many of the people getting lives. There are new people, but many of them aren't that interesting. Such a shame, I really liked the place.
"Lurk moar" isn't really necessary if the person posting isn't an idiot. You don't have to get in-jokes to add to a discussion; you should be able to recognize them for what they are and ignore them.
I see new people talk in close-knit IRC channels often, and most of them are capable enough to talk intelligently and carry on discussion.
I guess people are wanting to be accepted straight away so that they can have some 'warm summer memories' or something.
not alot of people are willing to put in time and effort to get to know a community and bond they want to bust in, drop in re-used comments/quotes from other forums and expect to have everyone laughing 'with' them.
i'm all open to having new blood within the forums i'm apart off, just leave the crap/stupidity at the forums they picked it up at without trying to bring it accross.
Of course people want to be instantly accepted. It seems like human nature.
i usually try to lurk in channels and comment once in a while, eventually i'll make a friend and start talking more until i become accepted.
i personally dont consider that there may be an established community present as my intention usually is not to join (or be accepted). and therefore i say what i feel for the purpose of saying what i feel apart from myself and in the presence of strangers. it simply is just a different form of expression, and all forms of expression are ways of releasing what must be released. this may or may not be equivalent to what you have recognized in the sense that someone jumps in freely and without regard, i don't know. but in the end, my answer is that i dont give a fuck. seriously.
aim:fabric
so ronery...
Generally, people are going to want to fit in no matter where they go. Sure, people should lurk more but only if they want to understand in-jokes and such. Otherwise you could just as well jump into a conversation with little to no knowledge about the site itself and hold your own.
Of course, most communities seem to be pretty elitist when it comes to new people on their site. People should learn to accept people when they present themselves without being an asshole. They should be happy someone would want to become a member of their community.