1) How did you end up as a hikikomori?
I'm not stictly a real hiki, I don't like society and crowds in general but I love individuals and made tremendous efforts to overcome my fears and awkwardness so I can enjoy life.
for example: I used to get panic attacks in shops so every friday I would buy myself a dessert from a small shop so I could get used to it... then went to big shops and told myself that I could leave at any time, leave the shopping cart and just go if it got too hard. My main bother was at the till, i always feared not having the money or my cheque being refused or just them being suspicious of me so I'd beathe deeply and concentrate on packing up groceries and say a simple 'good day' 'thankyou' to the cashier.
Back then it seemed so big and almost crippling but since then I've had to adjust to life as a real crip' in a wheelchair and my perspectives have changed a lot: At least fears can be fought and tiny steps made to being more socially outgoing, you can't fight nature though.
What happened is that I left home and school at sixteen to get away from my family. i knew something was wrong with my body but had no-one to confide in so I went away anyway.
Then I fell very ill (physically) - mentally I was doing fine and eventually had to come back home to them because I was unable to properly care for myself. The fact that I soldiered on independantly and in denial for so long made the illness far worse and so I guess I'm kinda paying for my pride.
2) For how long have you been a hikikomori?
Completly housebound? almost five years.
3) How severe is your hikikomori condition?
I don't leave the house or use the phone. I shop online and keep friendships to email/letters/parcels.
4) How can you afford the hikikomori lifestyle?
I can't. I pay my parents for my keep in repairs (electric stuff like computers and lightbulbs) and cooking.
5) Why do you continue staying as a hikikomori?
No choice. My body is a weak piece of shit, its immune system is wack, it doesn't get restored by sleep and it's constantly fighting deep infection. Basically it's not getting fed properly: most of tthe oxygen and nutrients it takes in doesn't get to the cells. Shit sucks but hell at least it's not AIDS or one of those awful wasting diseases where you choke to death slowly.
I find myself exhausted by small physical tasks and social stress such as making a phone call or having someone come round.
6) If you have successfully escaped your hikikomori lifestyle, what where the events that lead to that?
I hope to escape by gradually getting well again. I'm now on a form of chemo and trying my darnest to rest in this crazy environment. It's slow and frustrating but it's light at the end of a tunnel. I'd like to start up slowly by getting a part-time job where I get to sit down all day then maybe finish high school by distance learning.
7) What is your age?
24. I feel very old.
8) Do you think you're overweight?
Yes. I have a strict diet but there's only so much you can do in terms of exercise when your muscles won't work.
9) Which of the following describes your looks the best: below average/Average/Above average.
Probably average, I have a big nose but I take care of my hair and skin and wear a bit of makeup.
All I can suggest to hikkis is that they're not alone and yes the outside world is a bitch, I can understand that they don't want to ever have to deal with the plebs again. However, some people make it worth it all and it's not worth missing out on many good things because people are dicks in crowds.
Try gradually emerging and trying things, reward yourself for any ventures into the world however unsucessful, expect people to be dumb or selfish and be pleasantly suprised when some aren't.. oh yeah and avoid cons, even if it's a way of meeting up with online friends as they tend to concentrate idiots.