I can't quite put how I feel into words, but I have to try, just to get it off my chest. I feel indifferent to the fact that I am 18 and I feel I cannot interact properly with women: my friends, some of whom I secret loathe, mainly tell say "shut up, you need to get yer hole", to which I simply mumble some non-commital reply. I genuinely don't care that much, but it still puzzles me as to why no woman/girl/whatever has ever shown me any affection. I am not particularly ugly, I am intelligent, fairly well-off, fit and I am entering a highly-regarded course at good university soon. Do I not have any potential to interact? I can make women laugh, I can have conversations with them about anything and I treat them as equals (unlike meine Freunden).
Sounds like you have burdensome "friends".
Also, you can't expect these kinds of interactions to fall into your lap. You have to actively pursue them, I'd say. That's what makes it so annoying.
perhaps something about the way you carry yourself makes you seem unapproachable or standoffish.
I wouldn't think so, I smile at everyone and I'm very polite + well spoken.
First of all, get rid of those friends, they scare off the nice girls.
>>1 Women do not sense passion or desire from you. It's nice to laugh and it's nice to be treated equally, but if you are a friend. For love interest there is a need for passion too.
I think you might secretly be me! Your story is, word for word, the story of my life (except for the "I am not particularly ugly, I am intelligent, fairly well-off, fit and I am entering a highly-regarded course at good university soon," since I am a little chubby and I haven't entered a university yet :P).
We're even the same age and have the same kind of friends. Anyway...
I've received similar advice before, and I don't quite know how to interpret it. I seem to always get stuck in the "friend zone."
I met a girl that I haven't know for that long yet, but our interests are quite similar (she's even a gamer! And an old school one at that! Oh lawd, save me). She sends be little messages on Myspace everyday and has recently given me her number, so I at least know she is interested in SOMETHING.
But I feel our activities are borderline friend stuff. I don't know how to get closer to her romantically short of outright saying, "I like you." I've lived sort of a sheltered life and have only just recently been starting to have a social life (hell, I only took my first drink a few months ago >.>), so I'm completely and utterly inexperienced when it comes to girls.
Summary: ADVICE GO!
Passion? I can be spontaneous, I can (and do) act in a "quirky" (compared to my clone fiends) fashion. How should I find passion?
OP btw.
Also, cocks.
>>8 To find passion, you must experiment, get out of the house and try to look around, just think about what you are seeing, something will pick up your interest, then think about it, create a story.
To find passion you must simply give yourself in to feeling, like understanding the world and yet loving it. Be sharp, be smart but feel it, this will create a balance between being smart and being so called 'sensitive', which you will most likely never really be but, yeah, women like to call it being sensitive for some awkward reason...
ANYWAY, thats it, you must train your feelings, don't hide away from adventure etc, get on a train and go somewhere etc, stay there for a week, come back, hear peoples remarks about how crazy you are etc, discuss with them, get angry, yell at your parents, say sorry to them.
Do things that make you feel, being the feeling whatever it is.
I agree with 9 anyway...
Girls love spontaneous guys- you have to have the complete package- not just be nice, caring, sensitive etc- that sort of stuff should be a given, and for you it's not a problem since from what you've said, you have those qualities already.
Er, but perhaps take a little more refined approach to getting angry etc- not all feelings should be shown equally, know what i mean? Keep the negative ones under control, and let the positive ones come through, and it's all good!
gonna echo this guy, along with dude #9.
Don't treat them like equals : p I'm not saying slap them up and be a dick, but act like you're a busy guy with big plans in life and that a girl will have to work for your attention. You can still be a nice guy and pull this off.
Basically, be an assertive nice guy. Not a passive nice guy.
Wow, that's very good advice, #9. I've been feeling detached from everyone, including my parents. I rarely laugh in their presence, much less smile. I only laugh with my friends, but even then, it's reserved. I think it's why lots of people enjoy being online more, there's no responsibility to reach out when they don't feel like it. But to have passion, one must be active, not passive. Being passive is its antithesis.